h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yeah, ok, I can understand that.
You definitely should try hash, I like it much more than pot (a lot of people i know don't) and highly recommend it. There's just something about a perfectly brewed bot ... ummm ... I love hash.

Keep your pot and acid and mushrooms.. Kiddies sweeties... Sugar in your tea.
The Scots have known the secret of the altered state longer than the Maharishi.... Longer than those cactus sucking Mexicans.... Longer than those poppy sniffing Chineese.
We have HAGGIS
After one blow of haggis I love the world for at least a month... Yes even the ENGLISH... now that is an altered state of consiousness.
If anybody is interested I can give them the name of a really good Haggis dealer.

Yeah, can you imagine a cigarette infomercial?

Are you tired of having nothing to do with your hands? Are your teeth too white? Well now you can smoke Marlboros and eliminate these common problems but wait, not only will Smoking give you something to do and turn your teeth a disgusting shade of yellow, but you and all your possessions and dwellings will smell like an ashtray. And for every customer who starts smoking now, there's the added chance that you could catch lung cancer, throat cancer, or good old emphasema, and you can even pass these bonuses onto your friends. Want to forget what food tastes like? start smoking now!!

Of course people like me who have already quit are the most annoying wankers!!!!

Yeah, can you imagine a cigarette infomercial?

Are you tired of having nothing to do with your hands? Are your teeth too white? Well now you can smoke Marlboros and eliminate these common problems but wait, not only will Smoking give you something to do and turn your teeth a disgusting shade of yellow, but you and all your possessions and dwellings will smell like an ashtray. And for every customer who starts smoking now, there's the added chance that you could catch lung cancer, throat cancer, or good old emphasema, and you can even pass these bonuses onto your friends. Want to forget what food tastes like? start smoking now!!

Of course people like me who have already quit are the most annoying wankers!!!!

oh I don't think I have words to fully express my deep seated hatred of the whole concept of haggis or my physical loathing of it's taste.

Ah'll stick te ma droogs an you stick te your droogs (an' ah'll be hallucinatin' afore ye!!!) och.

Has anyone noticed the absence aforementioned instrumentally monickered persona? I miss his little contributions

where are you Johnny?

f**k. I hate it when this happens.

You should be able to switch off call waiting while on line Fenchurch. Try #43# or *43# to turn on and off (a la Tim Leary). Call BT if this doesnt work in your neighbourhood.

Johnny Guitar Watson had a couple of great singles out in the seventies:
"Cocaine on the brain" and one about "a knife a fork and a bottle and a cork" cant remember the title.
No one ever heard of a raving, stoned on pot football thug, Alcohol is the stuff yobs are made of!
Me, I drink Paulaner Weizenbier, yum yum hic.

AG

Fry your brains at home if you want to, but please don't drive on roads where I or my loved ones may be driving or walking.

There are in fact plenty of statistical studies that show that your opinion is wrong (and should it surprise you that under the influence you don't perceive the world as it really is?)
For instance, Mercer & Jeffery (http://www.raru.adelaide.edu.au/T95/paper/s4p2.html) found that 13% of drivers killed in car crashes had metabolites of cannabis in their system (in a total of 20% with some illegal drug). Now I know it's popular, but I don't think one in eight car journeys is made by someone stoned.
Haworth, Vulcan, Bowland & Pronk (http://www.general.monash.edu.au/muarc/rptsum/es122.htm) found that you are 9 times more likely to have an accident driving under the influence of cannabis than sober - yes that's about the same as for a pint and a half of beer, but that doesn't mean that EITHER is defensible.

Does this stuff really promote love and peace, or just a don't-give-a-shit attitude?

No wromg again, that was Dillinger.
Johnny Guitar Watson had Gangster of Love out.

AG

100% of all the accidents I have ever had while driving occurred under the influence of no drugs. This leads me to conclude that I am only safe while as high as a kite on whatever fruit scrapings or household substances I can find.

Luckily I tend to use common sense rather than statistics to make my decisions in life.

The references you have referred to as facts are a little shaky. Not only does neither study adequately show the effects of cannabis alone (since the test groups in both cases were negligible), but both used different methods for acquiring their data between the subjects and controls.
It might be easy to determine that a fatal car accident victim had THC metabolites in their system it would be almost impossible for the test group so comparison of the two will not be accurate.

This notwithstanding, it would be irresponsible to advocate driving under the influence of any substance. The arguments above (well right at the start of this protracted debate) related to the comparison of driving under the influence of alcohol and driving under the influence of pot. The studies you have brought to our collective attention support the argument that pot is safer than alcohol (but of course this won't be accurate either because of the above and because driving drunk is supposedly far more widespread than driving stoned).

but it is good to see somebody bringing facts to the picnic. I usually go for club sandwiches.

or bananas.

Fear Not....I have Returned. And it appears like it was just in time......MUSHROOMS?????? Eight hours grubbing around in a muddy field for a slight giggle and the feeling of smoke coming out of your legs? Good life decision.

I know you were being sarcastic, but I think that mushrooms are a good life decision. ...... Well maybe not life but at least a good weekend decision. Getting together with friends and laughing for eight hours. What could be better than that?

No offence or anything, but maybe you just didn't get good mushrooms when you tried them.

Input!! Input. Tis I. Hmm... well i hope you don't actually think i was condoning the usage of any substance while driving. But its not as if people dont do it I agree that id rather base my judgements on my own particular experiences than statistics. Statistics, shmatistics. The people in the study probably drank as well as smoked. Which would explain, not excuse the irresponsibilty. can be very hard to walk let alone drive under the influence of 10 pints and a little smoke. And anywho Id rather be murdered by a stoner than a drunkard. When were those studies done?? ---and dammit mr guitar when you finally grace us with your presence must you again sarcastically debase shrooms???Tim Leary never thought anything was wrong with tripping to think and have life experiences. You know metaphysical transcendance, i like it and even if its only a delusion in MY mind, i'm happy to have someone keep the rug over my yeyes..

Also can i have some info on what HAGGIS is?? You got me interested...

Now you're talking.

Take all the bits of a sheep your dog won't eat - lungs, heart, probably brain in the old days but not since Mad Coo Disease (as they call it up there). Mince thoroughly. Add oatmeal and spices. Stuff into a sheep's stomach. Boil until you can't stand the smell in your kitchen any longer.

Serve with a pureed mixture of potatoes and what you would call rutabegas, I would call swedes, and a Scot would call turnips - "mashit neeps and tatties".

Drink lots of whisky to take away the taste.

That's what I thought it was. But Jimmy MacJock is talking about "an altered state of consiousness" from it. I think maybe he means something else. But I could be wrong, I've never had the stuff. =)

You have to be in an altered state of consciousness to enjoy eating haggis, but I think most Scottish people are. . .