h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

If you tell a Texan that in Britain red kidney beans are called chilli beans, they may well shake their head and sigh, although I have seen recipes that claim to be authentic Texas chili which have either onions or tomato in them.

2legs is actually right, here - they really are just variations on a theme. I've met people before who won't eat Mexican food, for example, unless it's made by a Mexican. Because otherwise it won't be good. I've never been able to understand that.

Quite so, and there are variations on themes all around the world, such as ingredients wrapped a pastry shell, from the Cornish pasty to the empanada to the turnover. A myriad different types of dumpling. But a dumpling isn't a pasty, and a chili isn't a curry, so I'm not sure where this point is meant to be going.

I've never heard of kidney beans being called chilli beans.

I haven't had chilli in ages. My girls don't really like it so we don't eat it often

Maybe they don't use that terminology in Yorkshire, Sho

Now I really, really want to make one It's such a big deal here that you can get meat ground especially for chili in supermarkets. It's like mince but coarser. And there are probably those who wouldn't dream of making it with anything but cubed meat.

Either way, I want one and I plan to make one in the near future

Well, that was my first attempt both for making chilli in the slow cooker (second only time ever using slow cooker), and first time doing a chilli using cubed/diced beef chunks, rahter than minced/ground beef.
I'm also trying to recall when the last time was I made a chilli.... Probably more than four years ago...

Anyhow, I'd looked up a ton of recipies, and there seemed a lot of favouring using the cubed beef, when doing the chilli in a slow cooker, which now I think of it, was probably the reason I bought the cubed beef
hmmm....
A bit like the stew (beef), I did last Sunday, the consistancy of the 'sauce' just doesn't seem right to me; Having used stove-top for years, when doing a stew, I'm just used to that* sort of thick reduced down sauce, with a stew, and likewise, today, for the chilli, to me, or at least to what I'm used to, it seems a bit 'thin', when done in the slow cooker...
probably because of this, the sauce also didn't quite taste tomatoery enough, to how I'm used to it being...
The little bit of cumin in worked (never heard of that before, but saw several recipies using it, and as I've got both ready-ground and seed in, thought I'd try it)... so that's a win, just adds a little something to it, in the back of the taste, kinda behind the chilli...

The chilli, almost* enough.... was that kind of not noticing it, until a few seconds after you'd swallowed, which is to me, how it should be, but not quite* enough.... so, definately not so restained on the chilli powder next time

Then, of course, to the fact it was with the cubed beef, rahter than minced/ground...

I liked it... but... its just not* chilli, with diced beef ; well, seeing as how I've only ever had chilli with minced/ground beef, before, no wonder, my taste, and overall 'sense' of 'chilli' just wasn't 'met' by having it with diced meat... but... yeh, it was* tasty, the meat was gorgeously soft, tender, melt apart as you ate, but and maybe again because of the diced meat, rahter than ground, it added to tthe overall sense that the sauce was just a bit thin... with the ground beef, its all a lot more.... sort of... er... 'together', being wrapped, as it is, each grind of b beef, in its tomato, chilli, coating...

and, nah... pinto beans ain't quite right, dunno why... needed to be kidney again really I think (again, probably just because its what I'm used too)...

Which all makes it sound like an epic fail, wheras, actually, that was really damn tasty, and with half a bowl of chilli, and half a bowl of rice, I'm stuffed now...

But I'd not call that chilli.... do it again... with diced beef, more* onion, more* garlic, more* chilli powder, black beans, and* pinto beans, 1 LB spicey kiewlbasa sausage,cubed, and perhaps another meat too, and call it spicey Polish-influenced beef, meat and bean stew, and I'd almost call it a 'differnt' recipie Which reminds me... must find a local source to get the duck blood from, for making Polish stews... seriously... they seem obsesed with bluddy duck blood

So... next time I do a chilli, think I'll stick to ground/minced beef, kidney beans, and more* chilli powder... and maybe do it stove-top next time, just to remind myself how I normally would be doing it/eating it...

I'm sure there is some stuff the slow cooker is best* suited for, but so far, I think both meals (the beef stew last Sunday, and chilli g today), would have been better, were they done, stove-top Hmmm.... also wondering whether it should have had an extra tin of tomatos in it today, though, of course, were that in the slow cooker, I guess it'd have been ending up even more* liquidy, rahter than necessarily any more tomatoery...

ahh. pastys.
yeh... dumplings... pastys... pierogi... I must* get round to trying to make my own pierogi; I've a theory that If I cook some, in the oven, they'll be basically cornish pastys, albeit with a differnt type of 'pastry'.... as it is, when I do them by boiling, short period, with a fry, afterwards, they're .... more like a 'snack' food one picks up, which just reminds me more of pastys, in some ways ... hmmmm... and now I'm craving a proper cornish pasty.... guess its time I made some shortcrust pastry soon, not done that in ages and ages

There's two kinds of chili in Texas. There's the competition chilies that have absolutely no visible vegetables or fillers. They can have tomato in it, but it must be in sauce form, no chunks. Basically, it's meat and a spicy sauce. The meat varies. I've had a really good chili that used cubed prime rib steak.

Now, many folks are very vocal about the No Beans rule in Texas chili, but that only applies to competitions. At home, there are no rules. Even at chili cook offs there are two types of chili, the chili for the judges and the chili for the "People's Choice". The People's Choice chili can have chunks and beans. They normally don't have beans though because you'll get called a Yankee.


Here's a good article on Texas Chili that almost reads like it was written for the Guide. http://survivalfarm.wordpress.com/2010/10/24/dos-and-donts-of-a-texas-chili-cook-off/

N.B. The joke at the bottom was most definitely not written by anyone who's ever been to a Texas Chili cook off as it keeps mentioning things like beans.

So now y'all know And that's probably the only time you'll see me use that colloquialism

By the way, I think the folks at Cavenders Boot City would disagree with this "Eating chili in Texas, Texas chili cook offs and beer seem to go together like levi’s, pickup trucks and a cow dog riding on the tool box."

Nuthin' but Wranglers at Cavenders (Disclaimer: We might have mentioned this before but I sure as hell can't remember).

Chilli without beans... but... but... hang on... arn't cowboys meant to just live off beans virtually? hence chilli should have beans... or not... I guess

Oh, we make some mean pots of beans as well, but they don't go in the chili (in competition).

Oh, by the way, I was a judge at a chili cook off. (It was the annual Outpost Tavern Chili cook off which was a prelude to the annual F.O.D, (Flight Operations Directorate) chili cook off at the Johnson Space Center.) The other judges gave me some good tips. Mainly, you don't have to taste every chili. Some were horrid. I'd almost swear that one of the teams submitted canned dog food by the look and smell of it.

Some overdid the heat and some were more like bolognese. One did have chunks of tomato and bell pepper and we disqualified it untasted.

A few days ago I was at the supermarket looking for some plain red chilli powder. Y'know, dried red chillis, ground or pounded or whatever it is they do to them. Could I find any? Could I heck as like. There's a dozen different chilli powders and blends, and when I say chilli powders I mean things like ground ancho and suchlike. And when I say blends I mean different chilli powders mixed with spices and salt But not just plain red chilli powder. I might have to make my own. Years-old spices are a thing of the past in my kitchen - freshly ground, wherever possible, is the way forward now.

And if tomatoes are going into my chili, and I think they will, well, there's almost always a bottle or a jar of passata in my cupboard these days.

I'd have probably been better off using passata, either on its own, or in conjunction with some tinned chopped tomatos
The place where I buy all my dried herbs, spices, and (mainly) whole spices/seeds from, has to be one of my favorite places on the plannet

In the Indian supermarket, you come in, walk past the fresh fruit and veg, and either take a right to go down big shelves buldging under the weight of industrial sized bags of rices, rice flours, chick-pea flour (err gram?), dried beans, lentals etc, or take the left....
I strongly recommend the left....

Ten, hang a left, but duck... as its a low sort of enternce way, into the spice area.... and... gosh... spices and spices and spices....
I think the entire spice/herb/seed area is split into three; the first is all* the spices/herbs/seeds etc., in 100 G bags, then the same exact ordering and range occurs again, in 200G bags, and then, again, in I think 400 G bags
Sadly, I have two out of my four top kitchen cupboards, full of dried herbs, spices, seeds, gram flour, lentils, beans, dal etc, and really just can't physically fit anymore in there

I always keep things in, like ground cumin, and garum mucarla spice blend, but when I have the time, and remember, I always just take out the seeds, to make up my own versions fresh of the garum mucarla, or just use cumin seeds (which I prefer), mind, I've also got my own spice blends, in tubs, like my own dansak mix I make up, useually doing a big batch of it, when I do a dansak, and keeping the rest in the tub, for spare/the next time

Actually... I'm so* overdue having a sort out in the spice cupboards Re-organising them periodically just makes sense and I must* get back to cooking some Indian dishes, not done biriani or dansak, or dal or anything in ages and ages Actually, doing the chilli last night, and doing the rice with it, first time in ages I've done basmati rice, and that smell that hits you, from it cooking, about 10 minutes in, I'd almost forgotten that* smell (and I've the best part of a 5 KG bag of basmati taking up most of the top of the fridge, a along with my 3 KG bags of organic bread flour), and I might as well eat that rice up...

Must get soem of this chilli into tubs, to freeze... I'm half tempted not* to label them... then it'll be pot luck between beef stew and beef chilli when I next just grab a pre-made meal from the freezer...

There must be some kind of law that Indian food shops have to be laid out like that There was one very near to one of the last places I lived in London that sounds just like yours, and sometimes I'd go in there even if I didn't need anything, just to breathe in those aromas

All the fruit and veg was out front like an old school greengrocer, then inside there'd be those huge bags of rice, massive tins of ghee, bags of beans and lentils, then you'd go through a low doorway and down a few steps to where all the spices were kept, and other stuff I didn't even recognise. And they had those massive bags of loose tea which weren't such a big draw for me at the time because tea isn't exactly expensive in Britain, but they're much more attractive here because 1. it's much harder to find loose tea, 2. when you do it's relatively expensive and 3. if you have to make do with tea bags it's generally weaker than British tea.

One doesn't use tea bags doncha know. That's like putting a bottle of ketchup or a jar of marmalade on the table instead of decanting some into a small silver pot with a spoon. Terribly non-U and infra dig

I use tea bags with little strings on them

I know I mentioned this elsewhere (possibly Useless Facts) but the tea bag was an accidental invention. A tea merchant sent some of his customers samples of tea and he wrapped them in silk sachets.

Silk would be preferable to the paper bags of today. I don't miss that film of white, er, whatever it is, that you get on top of a cup of tea made in the mug with a paper tea bag. And making tea in a teapot with bags... well, it just ain't right. Silk purses and sows' ears come to mind.

I'd be quite interested to know what the native Texans make of my chilli.

Onions, garlic, thyme, oregano, cumin seed. Fry gently. Add salt. Fry more.

Chillies - depends a little bit what I have in the cupboard, but I usually go with a couple of chipotles, an ancho, a pasilla and a new-mex-red. Might throw in a habanero if I'm cooking for chilli-heads. Rehydrate, reserve the water, chop the chillies and throw in with the onions.

Chuck steak, finely diced, AND about half a pound of steak mince. Fry.

Crumble over a beef stock cube; get some nice brown colour. Throw in the chilli water and a bottle of darkish beer.

Good squirt of tomato puree, plenty of black pepper and maybe a dash of Worcester Sauce. Simmer away until gloopy.

I may or may not add kidney beans (never called 'em chilli beans in my life) depending on how I'm serving it. With a baked potato, beans go in. With nachos/sour cream/cheese or - god forbid - a chilli dog, no beans.

B

Sounds good to me.

I think I'll have a crack at that recipe, B. With added chilli beans.