h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Maybe you should offer to fix 2legs chair before he does himself a mischief?

I feel very unstable on this chair now... it keeps trying to tip back as well as being at a very odd angle... I tried to play guitar whilst sitting on it a bit ago... and it was just so not working ... for which I blame 2legs I also blame 2legs for my having to go off out for the rest of the day in about half an hour to drink, smoke and (hopefully) do some ... kink

I blame 2 legs for my car breaking down

I blame 2legs for people thinking I am a chap called lazanby

You were better than Roger Moore

I blame 2legs for the fact that three screws in that stupid four-door wardrobe wouldn't come out, so we had to carry it downstairs half assembled. It wouldn't have been so bad if we'd not been trying to take it away from the far wall of a 2.5m x 3.5m room where the door opens in and there's a double bed in the way... Also, the ceiling is under 2m, so we couldn't even turn the wardrobe on its end!

I blame 2legs that I could think of a purchase that would use up the rest of his ISA

what a new guitar?
I blame 2legs for mammoth drinking smoking sessions that go on to the early hours and mean you don't eat any dinner and for having sex whilst your too drunk to enjoy it properly and for my not having had lunch yet

'nuff said!

I blame 2legs for my lunch I just had

I blame 2legs for backlogs and the utter booooredom of legal paperwork

I blame 2legs for the fact that my hair has decided to go for the "punk cockatiel that just rolled out of bed" look - and that's *after* I brushed it!

I'm having a bad hair day too... I've not even mustered up the energy to try and brush it into shape yet
I also blame 2legws for general lethergy ... and my ignoring all the useful stuff I could be doing today

I blame 2legs for not telling Mala that the simplest way to never have bad hair days is go get a crew cut.

Saves a lot of time and money as well. No need to comb or brush your hair, and you don't need to use much shampoo either

But I'd get cold ears!

I blame 2legs for those really annoying wardrobes we just put together

I blame 2legs for not telling Mala that the dark blue H2G2 hat is excellent for warming cold ears.

I also blame 2legs for all paperwork deceased parents generates

I blame 2legs for all paperwork... full stop I also blame 2legs for my wonky chair making me feel very insecure ... well moreso than useual anyhow
I think one more tilt back on thechair and the metal will just give way and the seat bit shall no longer be attahced to the base part

I blame 2legs for tipping back on his chair.

I further blame 2legs for making me terribly envious of all the leisure activities he gets up to, especially since I only saw my young gentleman once last week and we were both very tired.

I blame 2legs that my watch has stopped - how *very* annoying!

Or has it?
Or is it time which itself has stopped, meanign teh watch is still showing the right time?
I blame 2legs for time dilation and time decorylation events on the horizon
I also blame 2legs for laundry, coffee, cigarettes, tuna, mayo, gherkins and wholemeal bread but not necesarily in that order