h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I am a bit dense in a writing world.
I miss the faces and voices and other cues.

Here were my newbie concerns especially about posting intimidation.
When you are not responded to for a while or you are the end of a thread how do you know if you are a thread killer ,insulting, you completed the thought or you are being ignored?

I have read on site, the best way to get rid of people is to ignore them if you are not the insulting type. I was not the first newbie to see that and wonder Until you know the personalities and the site there is no way to guess without being insulted if you have nothing of value to add or worse, you're just an irritation.

I do not know GuideML. I tell newbies that are not computer wise they do not have to learn it to participate. I believe some leave due to this technical ignorance.
Some aces make it sound like a requirement.
I did not post but only read for a year because it was a mystery to me being totally new to computers and I thought I had to use it.

Whew.

Backlog.

Read it all, since I haven't been around here for a while.

The questions posed by B when she started this thread are good ones. I think that what my intimidate folks who have just signed up or are considering signing up is the sheer SIZE of this place. Yes, there are forums for just about everybody. The trick is finding them. Lots of people, I suspect, are just overwhelmed.

Things have gotten a LOT better since I first signed on, in the midst of controversy, and jumped into one of the most devisive conversation threads around.

I also can't imagine the current italics threatening a newbie (I'd been around for nine days, I think) who had not yet posted anything of any significance, with being banishment, even if that newbie had a vested interest in one side of a divisive thread and was a self-proclaimed associate of the person(s) responsible for all that controversy.

NBY

Usually I skim read very long posts because I don't have the patience but I read every word of yours Kea.

I agree with you about the controversies and arguments, they ARE integral to the community, as long as they don't take over.

You could always ask the researcher posting the thread to explain what has happened in the UK. It seems polite to me anyway.

Thinking about what people have posted here I reckon that it's impossible to find a 'one size fits all' ambiance on any internet forum (though as I say, this is the only one I've ever taken part in).

Just as in RL, people relate in different ways, have their own personalities, idiosyncracies and personal needs. And just like in RL, if a person is somewhat shy or easily intimidated, then they will probably feel the same here on occasion. But, as has already been pointed out, this site is so huge and all-encompassing that I find it difficult to believe than anyone would not be able to find some nook where they feel welcome and comfortable. Though this might take some perseverence.

Although I'm not easily intimidated I do fall prey to bouts of insecurity and/or over-sensitivity (as Ivan just did with regard to what Teasswill posted) but it's been my experience that if I confront the person (as Ivan has) the result is usually one of better understanding.

I have always found h2g2 to be very welcoming (in general). But then again, I'm a rather tenacious sort of person. Once I find something I like I am loath to give it up just because of a few unpleasant experiences. And so, this would be my advice to all newbies - to just stick it out and keep looking around until you find the place here that suits you best.


az

I hope a lot of newbies aren't reading this thread. We make h2g2 sound like a really bad place.

It's so easy and inviting to analyse the worse qualities of a subculture you're part of. We care about this place so its problematic aspects really bug us.

What I hope the newbies reading this will remember is that the good aspects outweigh the bad ones for everyone who has posted here. We wouldn't be here if we didn't enjoy hootoo.

ps

To Blatherskite - no, it wasn't YOU! In fact, it was you and P-c who convinced me to return to the thread (even though you all continue to ignore me there ). It was another researcher, who as I said, has since ended up becoming one of my most cherished friends here. Which I think is another good example for not letting a misunderstanding put one off.

az

my ps

What I was trying to say was that all the dirt that we're dishing here isn't necessarily all that essential for a newbie.

<>

Oh, I don't think so, Aïna. I think we are simply addressing the possible problems a newbie might come across, so I reckon it's quite a good thing for them to see these things being discussed here.

Perhaps this thread will help them to think - 'oh it isn't just ME then!' - and it will empower them to keep on looking around.


az

A very fast moving thread like this one can put newbies off, but I see no reason why it should put them off hootoo altogether. The ace's welcome is a very good thing to start with, I plunged into guide ml and set up my PS before I even had a conversation, and I can recommend it, because people will find some information about you when they come and have a look, and I was very proud to have managed something that was completely new to me. Several newbies have left me messages, attracted by my nickname, I always answered to them, but many of them never replied again - that could put me off answering the next time a newbie leaves me a message, really.

Ivan, I would have liked to answer to your posts, but when I came to reading them, there were so many later posts already, and I can still hardly keep up with the conversation - although I'm in the same time zone as most people here.

<>

Yes, I agree with you there, B'Elana. It was nice to get a welcome and my ACE also helped me out with a few questions I had about the site.

I also agree that setting up some sort of PS thingy is a good start - I did this on my second day here. Later on (since it turned out I was a total dunce about Guide ML) another hootoo friend designed my page for me, adding pictures and such. It's the same page I use now, and though I *have* learned to edit the page a bit I could never have created it on my own.

I also get occasional messages left on my PS by newbies, and I always answer them (except in one case, someone I found was leaving messages on PS's that had 'girly' names - he obviously thought h2g2 was some sort of pick-up joint). But I do try to be welcoming.

I have also discovered that I am on the friends list of people I have never heard of, people who have never contacted me. This is a bit weird, I must say.


az

>>I have also discovered that I am on the friends list of people I have never heard of, people who have never contacted me. This is a bit weird, I must say. <<

So I'm not the only one ? That's reassuring, really. I wonder what makes people add you to their friends list without ever having talked to you in the first place

>>(except in one case, someone I found was leaving messages on PS's that had 'girly' names - he obviously thought h2g2 was some sort of pick-up joint)<<
Happened to me the first week I was here, so it took me very long to realise, but I'm still in touch with them, cuse they're both very nice and have always been polite, so I had no reason not to talk to them.

Thanks alex

The problem with asking for an explanation of a thread is that often by the time I get to the thread there are already several pages of postings. If I ask for an explanation there can be another page of postings by the time I get back to it (I'm pretty much in the same time zone as Ivan, so I'm often asleep when all the activity is happening). I started a thread on The Forum btw F135418?thread=605361 .

One thing that Ivan's comments got me thinking about was the threads where people getting to post their opinions seems most important compared to the threads where engaging with each other is most important. This varies alot depending on the thread, but I have been in some conversations where the debate definitely takes precedence over people actually communicating with each other.


~~

az and B'Elana, I sometimes add someone I don't know to my friends' list because I find their journal entries interesting. I used to always introduce myself or let them know what I had done, but I must admit I have gotten slack about this now. I tend to think of the friend's list as a subscribing option, as well as away of keeping up with friends.

~~

I was thinking about when I joined h2 - the first week I put 'newbie' in my tagline. People were *so* nice to me. I didn't have any problems going into threads, and most people said hi or whatever. Maybe it's changed since then I hope not.

In my first week I also started a thread about Should I be Worried? about how I hadn't gotten the dishes done for a week and what would happen when I ran out of food. I lived on h2 for those first few months.

So I found it relatively easy to get with what has happening here. It helps that I really love a good argument. One thing that concerns me though is that in RL I know that in groups with loud people, the quiet people often get missed. I wonder how much this happens on h2 and we don't see it because we are not physically present. Quiet people often have unique perspectives on things because they listen more. Sometimes it takes intention or creating space to get to hear them though.

kea.

<>

Oh, no sh*t?

I do understand what you have said about the 'quiet people', but on the other hand, what better forum for them to express opinions 'anonymously' than here? This should actually be a place where shy people might shine - they can express what they feel without RL people putting them down.

And if a few rude hootooers put them down - what harm has been done?

Therapeutically speaking, I reckon h2g2 could actually be a very nice way for shy people to speak their minds without having to worry about the response. I mean, should one truly care that some 'nickname' on hootoo has disagreed with you?


az

>>I mean, should one truly care that some 'nickname' on hootoo has disagreed with you?<<

No, you shouldn't, but some reserchers are specialised in getting very personalin their replies, picking on your grammar, selection of words or spelling, for reasons unknown to me. The problem of many researchers is, that they are ignorant of the fact that there actually are some researchers for whom English is NOT the first language, and even if it is, and their language isn't 100% correct, what gives anybody the right to pick on them because of that ? I have learned to avoid or leave conversations where a certain researcher posts regularly .

Well yes, but you know there's still a person behind the nickname. In theory I agree that posting here should cause a lot less stress than speaking with people in RL, but there's no way I can just stop being shy around strangers, whether or not they're speaking to me from the other side of the globe. This is still a social situation, even if this is a freer (is that a word) environment.

I'm probably sounding pretty socially challenged right now. I *can* meet new people, I do all the time, and I get along with them. Honest! But those situations still do stress me out, both here and in RL.

I was replying to az.

<>

Which is also good advice for any newbie who comes across someone who is obviously just being nasty.

Well, as I've said before, I don't actually like txtspk being used here, but it is silly to harp on grammatical or spelling errors (I only do this with friends, when they know I am kidding with them). My thing about using paragraphs in long postings is about making the posting more readable and user-friendly - it is never meant as a personal insult.

Once again, there are always going to be *nasty* people here, just like in RL. With a bit of time and experience, one can learn to simply ingore them. And move on.


az

>>Once again, there are always going to be *nasty* people here, just like in RL. With a bit of time and experience, one can learn to simply ingore them. And move on.<<

...which is one of the advantages online , because you just can't always ignore nasty people in RL

Yup, that's a definite advantage.

Apologies to Ivan for the delay in replying - this illustrates one of the problems, you ask a question of a specific person & the thread has moved on a page or two before the person is back on line. Does make for some disjointed conversations, or some posts being ignored.

I certainly didn't mean any offense to you Ivan, I was just pointing out that diverse as this place is, it's unlikely that absolutely everyone will feel at home & like it. There are bound to be some who register before exploring, dive in (maybe try to assert their view of how things should be) & find it isn't to their taste.