h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Okay the ubiquitous "CHAV". What is a chav exactly? Yes, admittedly I should look it up on an online dictionary but I reckon the H2 community might have some interesting things to say or provide useful insights in the way that other communities just can't do.

I'm slightly weary of being unPC, but methinks it has something to do with council houses, the unintelligentsia and Burberry?

I think you have it covered. Although several friends of mine have been using the term for a number of years (albeit minus the Burberry)

For the female chav, hoop earrings are de riguer. Also, one's skirt, if worn, should cover the buttock area but not much else.

RF

Also much to do with making careers living off benefits and driving small cars flat out with buckets strapped to the exhausts.

See http://www.chavscum.co.uk

and be otherwise known as a belt

the skirt that is, not the link in simulpost

As far as I am aware it is a slang term coined in the Medway Towns area, to define a particular type of youth from Chatham (prob. apocryphal) who wears designer gear, loads of cheap jewellery, hangs around shoping centres as generally unemployed, tattoed, pierced, with a pregnant underage partner or young child from an unmarried partner.
If female, the signs are low waisted skirts showing the classic 'T-bar' of her thong and cheap plastic white shoes, belly-wink and tattoo either in the small of the back or close to the cleavage.

http://www.oup.com/elt/global/products/oald/wotm/wotm_archive/chav/

Oh, I thought it came from Council House AVerage.

On chavs at the cinema:

chavs will find it highly amusing to sneak in some alcohol as it's just a another on the checklist of anti social behaviour.




I have just realised that chavs are everywhere.

On chavs' mobiles:


The use of mobile phones by Chavs to text messages each other has led to a new written form of Chav english, known as 'F*ckwit'. This is where Chavs write in an abbreviated text message form of english even when they are not sending a text message!

The sartorial chav:

The males wear baseball caps at all times (pref. Burberry), often with hooded tops on top of the caps (if you see what I mean). They obviously have very poor circulation as their hoods are also up all year 'round - even in heatwaves. Footwear is a form of sports shoe (usually a brand name trainer) which is useful as a good turn of speed is useful in their usual line of work. The females do not seem to feel the cold - they have a tendancy to sport legs with blue or purple splotches due to the imminent hypothermia caused by a lack of tights beneath the pelmet that they wear in place of a skirt. Sports shoes tend to be worn in summer and very high strappy sandals in winter. Practicality is the chavs watchword. Both sexes seem keen on an excess of gold belcher and/or curb chains at the neck and wrist accompanied by a permanently attached cigarette held by a hand covered in 'sovereign' rings. Blingtastic mate!

I'm not too worried about what they wear and what they talk like at the end of the day. My main annoyance is the way they are automatically suspicious and even aggressive towards strangers.

I can personally confirm that the Chathamchav (one word, no spaces) was recognisable and named at least as far back as 10 years ago. The term has spread but that's the origin.

Chav, apparently is an old romany term for child - chavi. Indeed, Del Boy is seen to call his new child a lovely little chav in a particular episode of 'Only Fools and Horses'

Of the particular type of person who is now likely to be called a chav other areas of the county they have come under other monikers before now. Some would call them a townie, others as a swill.

I remember when I was at school (late 80s) we had a word "chaff" which meant "to steal". I wonder if it came from that?

chavs are the lowest of the low, theyre like orcs, they go out lookin for a fight and if they cant find one they beat each other up! whats all that about??? just to say the word chav is from the romany chavri, nearly there lol, just one letter missin! i really dont like the chav, grr.

They also like
-to shout 'GOFFIC!' or 'O, you Mosher!' if you're wearing black/baggy jeans & hoody/trench coat/clothes they consider weird (anything that isn't designer, a track suit etc...)

-asking 'goffics' and 'moshers' for cigarettes, and if they say no and the chav is with a group of friends, they'll start something, using something along the lines of 'o bruv, why you lyin' ? I knows you gots some, like innit? Gimmie one bruv or I'll batter you, like!'

-Throwing bricks/bottles/stones etc... at 'goffics' and 'moshers' because it's 'fun' apparently...

I know there's *MANY* more but I really can't write them all down now... I'm on work surrounded by quite a few of them...

Here is a guide entry (in the making/ discussion phase) which you might find interesting or worth contributing to. http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/F48874?thread=626022 Y.

i did do a lil section on the morons, however the peers didnt like it, i tried to add it to teh guide but ive not found it yet, oh well i guess ill post it here, its a lil long winded but its fun, well here it is.

Ok, in this entry I will explain the chav, the reasons for its behaviour and just about everything I can think of to do with them.

The Chav is normally a violent, illiterate, unintelligent and abusive form of mankind.
They can be found, for one who actually wants to find one, standing outside of shops, normally off licences, on bikes trying to perform complex tricks, they normally fail miserably, resulting in the applause of their other ape-like friends who think they have succeeded, the chav is commonly found to be asking anyone who passes by "'Ere mate can u go inta dat shop der n get uz sum white lightenin'?? Or jus aney cider?” to which people occasionnally say yes, this is followed by "arr cheers pal/mate/fella, dats sound/boss dat!” however most of the time they are told "No, your about twelve years old and shouldn’t be drinking anyway." to which they normally reply by shouting meaningless growls and shouts of disappointment and abusive language such as "arrgh rawrgh grawar! You fu**in grwlsa tw** grah fragh ghhrarr!!!!!” this is normally followed by them being laughed at for their immense knowledge of highly abusive slurring, spitting and nonsensical growls, however if they manage to string together a sentence without actually being uncomprehendable they generally tend to get some sort of witty comment which they cant understand in response, or a smack in the face.
The chav finds it very difficult to fight his own battles, they tend to attack as a cluster, much like the goblin or orc, and just as violently and untactically, safety in numbers would be the term to use here, however this is flawed by the fact that they end up hurting each-other more than anyone else, the chav is much like the orc in the fact that they go looking for a fight and if they cant find one they will fight between themselves to determine who is "deh ardest in deh gang", this is silly, as is the chav.
The chav has a hate for everyone and everything, including themselves, however, having lived around chavs for the best part of my life, and being Goth myself, I can say that the most distinct hatred they have is directed towards the Goth culture, we are frequently set upon by this disgusting form of human, however they are easily deterred by tearing of outer clothing of the upper body and charging into the fray screaming wildly and going directly for the biggest one there, then making him cry, a swift knee to the testicles does this very well, however one must be wary of the others, and just keep going crazy, this has worked for me on a number of occasions and its fun anyway.
The chav is very unaccepting, anything slightly "weird" and they want to kill it, they are afraid of being undermined and put down by any member of any other culture.
The chav has a strict dress code, Burberry. Anything Burberry is acceptable, tracksuits and shirts, not together, are also acceptable as long as there is some form of visible Burberry on show, normally their socks, which are almost always over the bottom of their lower garments, the chav can be heard approaching long before it arrives by the loud and obnoxious shouts that rend the air in the early hours of the morning or the late evening when they are drunkest, however they can also be easily detected by the constant jingle of their "Bling Bling", every movement must be followed by a jingle or a rattle, they make very good shooting targets from long distances when the sun shines off the innumerable bangles and chains and sovereigns covering their body, just incase your interested.
The chav is the lowest form of society, the animals in the alleys and gutters are higher than them, as are the homeless and the dead, the funniest thing I have ever seen was two chavs in a completely Burberry car, exhaust tips and all, get out of the car wearing entirely Burberry shell-suits, with socks over the top of course, and so much Bling their elbows dragged along the floor not just their knuckles.
So, if one ever comes across a chav, point and laugh, make witty comments, confuse them and run into them when they do the only thing they know how to do, attack, then walk away feeling happy and fulfilled. I do

and im surrounded by them now in college, lol. i must confirm that yes i am a goth and yes i do hate them all, and yes they do have a habit of saying things like OI! Wierdo why you dreesed like that? in reply i like to say Because if i dreesed like you my mother would probably do what yours did and disown me you pleb!
also i wish to express the uncanny resemblance to the earlier description of a goth that was posted by the other dude, as i am sat here in black baggies, new rock boots, a trench coat and a black shirt open with a gray t shirt underneath, weird huh?

Chav=knacker, correct?