h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The 10 hungry lions have just arrived.

The SON Says, "Hah! Silly Old Fool Can't Take His Spirits! Why He Doesn't Just Retire Permanently To That Place Outside Of Time And Space I'll Never Know!" Downs HIS , Giggles, And Crawls Over To Join The Sumerian And The Scots Person Under The Table.

Bruce 7:42

To answer the thread title: get a grip, of course he didn't.

Bleedin' timewasters.

Aw, c'mon Roy. Pull up a nice comfy yak, and have a on the house!

Effers, do you think 10 lions will be enough?

There's an awful lot of Christians....

Actually I'm quite worried they'll be half starved.

Maybe I ordered a few too many?

I'm sending 7 back tomorrow morning.

We've got 3 really huge ones who'll enjoy playing with the christians as much as eating them. I've seen my cat do it with mice. Imagining that happening to Christians..

Clearly you have never watched a lion attack.

They waste very little time, and, unlike domestic 'kitteh' have absolutely no concept of play

On the positive side, they tend to be messy eaters

There'll be blood all over the shop...

I'm already fantasising about Christian arteries being punctured by giant canines. Fountains of red blood in all directions....

Must make sure the batteries on my web cam are properly charged up.

>>Must make sure the batteries on my web cam are properly charged up<<



Ah, google has exclusive video rights...

<>

My son the is working at Ward 62 (Haematology), and you should hear the way he talks, assessing everyone's veins, and talking in a truly disturbing way about cannulation and taking their blood...

Vicky

Hi Rick,

[Deletes about 4 pages of text and decides to start again]

Sorry to be so slow getting back to you, but as you can probably see from the above, I have not been idle! I started trying to do a comprehensive reply and then decided I was just being a boring

Firstly, I don't think that Arianism is relevant to the debate over the Trinity. For our purposes, the Arians were Trinitarians. They believed in the Father, Son and Holy Ghost, and that those three were one. (They differed on whether Jesus had existed forever or not, because there is nothing in cannonical scripture to tell us this.) Furthermore, they may well have based that view on the 1 John verse, may have originated at around this time (or then again, it may not).

So I don't think Nicea is relevant - by this point in church history, Trinitarianism was the mainstream, orthodox view and there was no serious dissent from this (only 3 of the 300-odd Bishops at Nicea refused to sign the Nicean creed). Furthermore, the argument to authority fails if the authorities were basing their opinions on a corrupt text.

*****

Certainly the refs that you gave for God raising Jesus are numerous, clear and unambiguous. There is definite textual support for this. But the Holy Ghost ref is rather different; you have just one, and if you read it, it doesn't say that the Holy Ghost raised Jesus, it says that God raised Jesus and the Holy Ghost should dwell within you.

The 'my body is a temple' ref clearly shows that the author believed Jesus to be God; but again, this belief is not unique to Trinitarianism.

If we compare this to the very strong scriptural support for Adoptionism, it's clear that without the 1 John verse, Trinitarianism does not have unambiguous scriptural support.

Gif

Veins are no fun, Vicky. The blood is at a relatively low pressure as it returns to the heart via venous return. Hence blood samples are taken from a vein.

Now if you want to kill someone or commit suicide you go for an artery. The blood in an artery is flowing at high pressure as it is pumped by the heart, directly. Slit your wrist appropriately and you may an initial giant spurt into the air. As I said a fountain.

Yes arteries are where its at for lions with big canines biting Christians.

Veins are just for s and junkies I'm afraid.

I thought they went straight for the spinal chord?

Who nurses?

Gif

Yeah. Viscious buggers, nurses. A match for any lion.

No, Gif, these lions I've ordered in are specially trained for ''Christening Christians' as its jokingly called. They jump up and and pierce the carotid artery in the neck, the most spectacular one for blood fountains. As the lion is mauling, the blood squirts out either side of its mouth, like a roman candle. The lion itself is thus drenched in blood as it comes back down. After the initial blood lust, and more general mauling and biting and chewing and eating, the lion very cutely licks itself all over like a domestic pussy. It makes a nice ending to the show.

Sorry, it was you Ed, who spoke of spinal cords, not Gif. The spinal cord wouldn't help the show as the Christian would be immediately paralysed. The idea is that the Christians writhes in agony for a few moments whilst there's still blood enough left in their body..

'course...a fair number of them volunteered for martyrdom. They'd make a public show of not making offerings to the state gods and then say 'Whatcha gonna do about it?' One court is recorded as telling them,
'If you want to commit suicide, just go right out and do it...but stop wasting the court's time.'

Effers, you are a deeply disturbed individual.

Gif

Have you only just realised that Gif?

I recommend reading, 'The Savage God, A study of suicide' by A. Alvarez' which I read many years ago. I seem to remember him explaining that the reason 'Suicide' was made a sin by the church, was that so many Christians were topping themselves to get to heaven. I suppose they were panicking that their lemming mentality would mean they would soon be extinct.