h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Anybody have any new stories?

I have three cats. Seventeen-year old Smokey appears on the previous page - he of the "presenting chickens to people sleeping in the buff" story!

Skittles is 12 and two years ago was very badly injured to within an inch of her life. I had actually gone to sign the papers to give consent to have her put down, but she showed just a little spark of life when I stroked her and the vet persevered. She is well, but disabled, and does not go out into the garden at all.

With the house mostly carpeted, she is finding it too warm in this current weather to sleep on the floor or on the beds, and the dogs take up most of the kitchen lino so she does not get a chance there, so she has taken to perching on the living room windowsill - not too comfortably. It was with some surprise then, that I discovered her on her back, with her legs in the air in the bath, under the tap, which she was patting to encourage a drip of water every now and then to fall on her face. I gently turned the tap on a quarter-turn and she played in the water for about 20 minutes before taking herself to the other end of the bath for a thorough grooming session.

That was four days ago, and she begs me to do it for her every day now!

Happy Tuesday
Universal Granny

I love it! Now that's a smart cat! Mine lays in the sink where it's cool, but shows no interest in water!

I've two cats at the moment the elder one, ScoobyDoo, appears to understand a great deal and communicates with us humans as equals(even teaching us to headbutt him in greeting). He loves sleeping in my partner's car and loves olives, tomatoes and pasta. We think he is a reincarnated Italian gentleman. The younger one, Kipper appears rather slow mentally but is very good at catching birds, frogs and worms. He is frightened by his own shadow but will play fetch with a furry ball. He will eat anything, including Scooby's vomit We think he is a reincarnated dog! On Christmas morning my partner was reaching under the Christmas tree for the last presents when he made a gruesome discovery. One of the cats had deposited a headless mouse along with the presents as a gift for us. I love

I'm a park ranger. I drive a state truck, a pickup with a lightbar on top for doing law enforcement. Recently, my idgit has taken to climbing up on the truck and laying on top of the lightbar, so that she's tall and can survey her territory.

I got in from work at 0630 the other morning to find my eldest cat (17 years) howling in the hallway. He rubbed all round me and begged to be picked up, then to be put down, then to be picked up.... strange behaviour for him. I took him in the kitchen to give him some food, but he didn't want it, just kept rubbing and howling.

As I watched (and this bit is a bit gory) the whole of the top of his head erupted - he had three abscesses which all burst simultaneously and he was obviously asking my help. I cleaned him up with kitchen towel and warm water, while he growled (with pain I presume) but stayed with me until the job was done. He must have had one whopper of a headache! The holes are mending now and he is a lot better, but stays indoors much more and is

oops! accidentally posted there instead of finishing the sentence!!

...stays indoors much more and is VERY affectionate now, instead of the usual "Jack-the-Lad" he used to be.

Poor boy! Glad he's doing better now!




So, UG, did you get more guinea pigs yet?

We have always been a cat-mad family, and have contrived, since I was born, to own at least twenty-odd (at one time we had twelve at once - but then we did live on a farm and they were technically working cats, if rather spoiled ones).

A few tales:
Indie was a large, fluffy, affectionate and unbelievably stupid cat. We adored him (obviously) and spent an awful lot of time rescuing him. For instance, in our main room we had an iron stove (no central heating, this was a seriously OLD farm house). In the summer we used to use it as an ad hoc coffee table and at one point it had a foot-high stack of magazines on it. Like all cats, Indie liked to sit in high places, and one day decided to take a flying leap from the back of the armchair onto the pile of magazines. There was a very long moment while he sat in 'nothing untoward is happening' pose as the whole pile slid slowly sideways...
And in winter we would clear all the gubbins off and light the stove and use it to boil bathwater on in great big pans. One day the top of the stove was pan-free, and Indie, who normally curled up on the wood next to it (must have realised it was hot, surely?) leapt up onto the stove. He was very happy to let us hold icecubes to all four paws, I must say.
We also had the pleasure on several occasion of watching Indie, who never learns, eye the stove from the armchair next to it, then decide to stretch out and step onto it (when cold - he had learnt that bit). He ALWAYS misjudged the stretch and just the very very tips of his paws scraped down the side as he belly-flopped to the floor. We began to think this must really be a fun way to get down from the chair.
One day I made a big tray of EXTREMELY rich and chocolatey brownies. I left them to cool covered with a cloth and went to do something else. It never occured to me that cats would like the smell of brownies. When I came back, some small toothy creature had chewed a hole through the cloth and eaten NEARLY HALF THE TRAY. I know my brownies, and a full-grown human would feel sick after eating two. Lord knew what six would do to a cat. We found poor Indie sitting on the doorstep, tummy round and full and tight as a drum, hiccupping and burping and refusing to budge an inch, with his whiskers full of chocolate crumbs. Astonishingly, he didn't throw up. He sat there for two days without eating or drinking or so much as twitching his tail. On day three he staggered to the water bowl and drained it, and then staggered to the dirt tray and made it imperative for us to change it at once. After that he was fine.

I could go on. And that's just Indie. I still haven't told you about the exploits of Wallaby, Svikas, Rasmus, Dimitri, Zazu, Tinsey, Kitsey...

Currently my aunt has 6 cats, two of which I claim joint ownership of. Her oldest female is called Splodge and despises the hoover - whenever it gets turned she'll stand, hissing but otherwise motionless. one day I was hoovering and my aunt was moving some clothes off the table. Splodge was hissing at the hoover as usual until my aunt accidentaly brushes past her. Splodge jumped literally 4 feet straight up and then ran into the kitchen, not to be seen again for a whole day. Our oldest cat, Spike, is really nervous of just about everything except Splodge. Despite our best efforts nature took its course and Splodge gave birth to four healthy but insane kittens; Dawn, Yoda, Smurf and No-name. Spike is terrified of his offspring but they love him. Everytime he comes into the house the kittens charge at him to play. He reacts by running up our kitchen door and hiding which has worked fine except now the evil bunch can climb the doors, trapping Spike until either my aunt od i rescue him

Our cat has something of a penchant for boxes ... no idea why but if there's a box lying empty she's squeezed into it before you can say "why's that cat in the box" ... loves plastic bags too and is frequently found asleep in them ...

Just plain daft, there's no other word for it ...

i used to live in a box ?!

My boyfriend's family cat Kitsey loves boxes too. He would jump in, and after a few minutes want to get out again. The flaps of the box would of course be sticking out on all sides looking, to a cat in a box, relatively solid, so he would put his front paws on one for leverage so he could hop out - and the darn thing would bend under him, and either leave him hanging over the edge of the box by his armpits or slithering back in. He could not work it out. He'd try it again and again, and you could always see him thinking 'Looks solid, so where does it do? Why can't I put my weight on it? What's happening?Help!'. When we took pity and lifted him out, he'd often as not jump back in again. Boxes lying on their sides were safer, and he'd go to sleep in them. On one occasion, he was scrabbling about in a box on its side and somehow manged to tip it up so he was under it like a tortoise in a shell. And then he couldn't get out, and ran madly about, a self-propelled box bumping about the living room. Then he learned that if someone left a plastic bag on the floor he could rush into it and the momentum would slide him along. He tried to do the same to a paepr bag and merely tore it, hurlting out the bottom looking deeply surprised.

We have three rescue cats, who are all beautiful. Ever since I was a baby, I've always been used to there being cats around. A few quick stories...

A couple of people have mentioned their cat's fascination with boxes. Our cat Bubbles loved them, she used to try to get in any box, no matter how big or small. One day, I decided to try her with a matchbox, which I put in the middle of the floor. Sure enough, Bubbles walked over to it, and sat with her front paw in it, purring contentedly!

We have a six-month old kitten called Milo. He wakes me up early every morning to feed him, by biting my nose. No matter how many times I push him away, trying to get a few more minutes sleep, he comes back again. It's like he's on a piece of elastic! Milo also plays 'fetch' for hours at a time.

Lastly, our cats have two fishing rods with mice on the end. Every night before we go to bed, the rods are downstairs. When I wake up, without fail, they are on our bed. I don't know which one brings them up, but they're quite heavy toys, so it must take a lot of dragging!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/3163574.stm

Ouch!

Ouch is right! Here's to Roy's recovery


I sure hope they won't end up putting the tiger down for doing what tigers do naturally!!! That's the chance you take when you turn wild animals into performers.

Yes, I was thinking that too. We were saying earlier that most domestic cats lash out once a year or so. Big cats must be the same, only much stronger.

My little idgit has bled me more than once. I shudder to think how much damage a tiger could do!

Those 2 guys are 59 and 64. If that's an up-to-date pic they must be putting something in their tea.

I can remember watching them on TV my entire life, but I was still surprised to see their ages!

I'd be curious to know what all behavioral similarities there are between the big cats and our little domestic versions. I watch Animal Planet, then watch my girl, and think that cats and tigers have a fair amount in common. More so, it would seem, than dogs and wolves.