h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

indeed n i g h t h o o v e r v o d k a v o d k a n i g h t h o o v e r

gone!
Evaporated by you know who!!!!



'g'

The hoover does indeed move in mysterious ways like the emptied dust bag of fate the eternal fullness of the hoovery glass

The hoover does indeed move in mysterious ways.......

Remote control??
Programmed to sniff out dust???



'g'

There was a land so smitten, by dust and dirt and filth,
that no one apon this land could turn their hand to fend the tilth,
the dust-bunnies ran rampant,
the children they lived in fear,
and no not there be one person who in this land brewed beer,
The sorry state continued,
until one day at last,
the hand that holds the hoover holds the hoover came to pass.

The hoover moved across the land,
Across field, valley street and road,
and once the hand had moved thus,
the peoples saw there new clear road.

They all had to follwo the path,
The road that leads to he,
he who holds the hoover that holds the hoover as do we.

the land grew rich and wealthy,
they soon found how to brew beer,
and all thought on the hoover with mhrileyment and none did sneer.

the hand that holds the hoover,
mightiler than sword or gun or tea cake.
the hand that holds the hoover
never fear the badger or snake.
n i g h t h o o v er n i g t h vi eho v er h iv wn aosie eoily oily oily oily oilky oilky oilky oilky oilk!

Sod you!

Just wait until I can get hold of a Bible!!!!



'g'

And lo! the night approacheth whence bread crumbs filled the land of carpets. Entranced and magical, the crumbs from homemade bread, from bakery baguettes, from toast and biscuits, dropped from plates and softly whispered threads both near and far, and spread their trails around the chair legs and under the table.

But hush, what noise is that?

Preys bee! Tis the nighthoover

I could really do with having a nighthoover tonight.... the carpets filthy and we've a guest coming over in the morning/afternoon
Priase be lettuce hopeth the hoover moeth over the floor in the night
Mmmm baguette... that gives me an idea

Oh yes, and the baguette doth beget many crumbs but none so many as the flaky pastry of an Eccles cake.

All hail the hoover

indeeeeed for the hoover dost move in mysterious ways n i g h t h o o v e r n i g h t h o o v e r n i g h t h o o v e r
Lettuce spry

Preys bee for n i g h t h o o v e r sucketh the crumbs from under the nontable of our lives, whether they be baguette, Eccles cake or even baklava, for He discriminateth not.

I wisheth teh hoover of the night woudl sucketh up my crumbs, for my crumbvs have magnituded manafold in thei abundance lttuce spry mrhily shtgoe and with sfmielry and sliry fgmirly mhryilness n i g h t h o o v e r

I'm afraid I have to disagree with one of the things you said, O 2legs.

A few pages back in the backlog, you have said 'But most of all, let us praise door handles and shirt tags'.

Now, door handles are definitely a very fine thing; but shirt tags are evil. They itch and they annoy, and I always have to cut them out carefully until no tag is left.


Please reconsider your position on this matter.

Regards,
Lady Pennywhistle

Dear Lady Pennywhistle

It behooves me to answer whilst our great and good guru 2legs is off in the wilderness, communing with things we knowest not what. But that of which you speakest, verily the dread shirt tags, and yeah any wretched label behind the neck, shall be cast out and cut off without warning. And so, without a reminder of how the shirts shall be washed, narily many might be cast into the pile of ruined garments. But this is the sad fate, either to wear the shirt with the irritating tags or take action and fie the consequence

*filth* and *tilth*? Thuccoring thucotath!


and

if it behooves you, do you behoover?

http://www.nps.gov/heho/historyculture/images/herbet_hoover_415w.jpg

http://www.korto.com/images/Hoover%20Dam.jpg

http://www.vacuumcritic.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/hoover-u5140-900.jpg

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/b/b0/Hoover-JEdgar-LOC.jpg/475px-Hoover-JEdgar-LOC.jpg

http://www.newsfollowup.com/id/images_7/hoover_crossdresser_1.jpg

And finally- NightHoover:

http://www.fotothing.com/photos/e6c/e6c3549417e12f1ffb28b5e1411fcf83_569.jpg

That's not a NightHoover!!!

That is the Hoover Dam at night!!!!




'g'

Everybody do the Hoover!
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Lt7UvMOveug/Sh10QTH1ofI/AAAAAAAAHBE/RNKteE_mY6g/s1600-h/hoover.jpg