h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, we breached copyright of just about every scifi show and/or movie ever.

well if they do I'l catch them in the tractor beam fire phasers at them, send them through the stargate, where a shadow ship will take them through the jumpgate to the Empire to meet Darth Vader

Have I missed anyone

Hmm, stick in some Space Pirates, mobile suits, and a fe demons to pretty much cover animé.

Bring on the lawyers

It sounds like you have a cunning plan up your sleave, do you care to share!

*a goon from paramount pictures opens up a suitcase carrying Star Trek copyright documents and demands an explaination and a cup of tea*!!!

(Spock) It's life Jim but not as we know it, it's a lawyer

(Bones) I'm a Doctor dammit not a character in a TV show

(Kirk) We come in peace, set phasers to stun

*Han and Chewie, on their way back to the Falcon stumble upon a mob of lawyers, their eyes gogle and they run, blastering as many as they can, but the mob is to large and lawyers well protected behind their massive suitcases full of legal documents*

[Han] I thought Jabba was dead

[Chewie]>must be some one else<

[Han] Who?

[Chewie]>beats me<

A "fox" goon comes forward with an offical sactionity from George Lucas himself, apperently!

*Deep raspy breathing*

George I know what you are getting for Xmas, I have felt your presents

*sorry couldn't resist it*

*A wjole bunch of Japanese lawyers from Sotsu Agency run onto the Outlaw Star and threaten with karate.*

Oh, kuso!

*TIE Fighters fly overhead in escort of many TIE bombers, while a division of Stormtroopers marches down the street with guns at the ready. The ground rumbles as AT-AT walkers surround the city and the sun is eclipsed as an Imperial Star Destroyer passes into orbit. Han and Chewie look at the Lawyers, who are co-ordinating the actions through their comb links, they look at Han and Chewie, unhappily*

[Han] This is bad

[Chewie]>we've seen worse<

[Han] but we had more people with us, and a fleet of ships, and ewoks

[Chewie]>true<

I used to have an Ewoks luch box. Ah, happy memories!

I hated those furballs

[Han] *looks pointedly at Reefgirl* lady, you don't know what they're like. They're like the VC, I ain't never seen nothing like 'em! They built fires around Imperial camps, chanted all through the night, left little bobby traps all over the place, popped out of bushes and speared Imperial squads before they could call for help. they're whicked fast and strong too, the cute is just a facade, trust me, they are blood thirsty

[Chewie]>they scared me something fierce<

*Stares back*

I ain't no lady cowboy

He never said you were a lady cowboy.
Anyway, I thought they were called "cowgirls".

I said I'm no lady (pause) cowboy

[Han] you know what I meant

[Chewie]>yeah<

Of course I did

Jeez why do I get involved in discussions with space junk like him still in my job you have to