h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

i have decided you all belong in the zoo with my monkeys. don't worry i will feed you chocolate cake, lemonade, and beer.

Swings on the monkey bars in Kat's World Famous in Tunbridge Wells, Monkey Bar, spills beer, cries pitifully.

don't cry you big baby. suck it up and smile.

Asks Kat for anther beer. Escapes while Kat is not looking. Last seen heading for Arrows R Us shop in Tunbridge Wells medievil mall.

Kay: You don't really mean that I should be locked up and put in a zoo do you? I have done nothing, except hung around monkeys like Looneytunes. *looks around* Bugger he escaped

get back here loonytunes, its not safe for you to be running around uncontrolled and drunk. someone could hurt you. as for you garibaldi, you are hanging around with the wrong sort of tunes. plus what is so bad about being in a monkey house with beer, lemonade, and chocolate cake.

For further instalments on Loonytunes life on the run visit the posted entry Tunbridge Wells

Ive always wanted a monkey. I read your stuff on teenagers, Kat, and I think it sums up some of us pretty well. It was short, but conveyed much meaning or something. Anywho, I think though, with a topic like teenagers, you might want a little more material. Just my suggestion. Of course, you could probably have just written "teenagers" and the forums would have conveyed just about every detail, and then some. Anywho, you said you like to visit other pages, and read others' articles... well, would you read my first one? That goes for anyone else. Im new, so havent had time to go to too many pages, but I stumbled upon yours, Kat, and felt like replying. The article is one rock climbing, and Im just curious what people think about my writing. Thanks,
--Fuzzy

well, teenagers was my first article, and after submitting it i did realize there was so much more i could have put in, but it was too late Of course i will visit your page!

You know, you could save money by buying Hooch, a combination of lemonade and beer....but then again it tastes pretty bad, and you don't want Loony rebelling again...me and my stupid ideas...

Just popped in while moving Loonys Life On The Run to the page entitled Airport Check-In. There is a fine alcoholic thread about Venice, How It Should Be. All happening at Lake Bliss. Last one in is a tee-totaller.

you really worry me loonytunes.

Kat, you have reformed me. Fine religious yarn now appearing on my home page.

But I thought the monkey was the root of all evil.

http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?MESSAGES[(*?threadid*9696?forumid*3594)threads[(threadid*9696?forumid*3594?subset*0)#p29524

I read this because I was searching for Gnu's. Your site doesn't seem the least bit Gnu-related.

no it isn't, in fact, i think gnus are highly overrated, so there!

Ding Dong Ding Dong. This is the 12 o'clock news. The price of beer, petrol and food has gone down. Taxes have gone down further. The really good news is a little known Briton, the imaginatievly named John Smith won the Upper Tunbridge Wells nose picking world champs. This is Briton's first sporting success this decade. And so ends the news bought to you today by the Tory Party. They know they're right. Our news readers fly Air New Zealand - leading the flight from Britain.

This is a test of the emergency gnu-cast system. The gnus in your area, in voluntary cooperation with the ABC and other authorities, have developed this system to keep you informed of an actual gnu. This is only a test.

*OLLY-OLLY OXEN FREEEEEEEE!*

This has been a test of the emergency gnu-cast system. Had this been an actual gnu, you would have been instructed to place your head between your legs and kiss your willy wonka goodbye. This test serves the greater tri-state area. The state of confusion, the state of diptheria, and the state of Brooklyn, but not necessarily in that order.

are you sure it was just a test??

Well the proper wording would have been 'exam' but I didn't wish to upset anyone on holiday. Political correctness and all that, y'know.