h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

here is the story behind the spinning blue poop:
my friend got sick and she shitted blue poop, when she flushed the toilet is spun very slowly. i can't tell exactly it happened. by the way, what did you think of my entry on teenagers?

enters wearing giant silver back gorilla suit, glares bainfully, slaps chest, emits low lovingly constructed Oscar Wilde like grunts

well i don't know about everyone else, but i am impressed. just make sure you don't knock over the china.

Drops Chinese kumquat peel on floor

I read it!!!

I read it, does that mean I get a monkey too?

Or wait-maybe not, I might get it tangles in my pitcher's beard.

But I've wanted a monkey my whole life-no, no I shouldn't. I don't know if I'm ready for that kind of responsibility.

Oh well. I read it.

Sort of the like the difference between diarrhoea and verbal diarrhoea

Not really folowing you. Just going in the same direction. That's all.

Saw a funny thing once. You just reminded me of it. Whenahworralad, I saw a lady with a big (monumental) piled-up hair-do (the fashion, at the time) attacked by a monkey at fair. I can't remember how the situation arose, or how it resolved itself. But I can still see that monkey tugging at the unfortunate woman's hair.

If it was my mother, and if it was a male monkey, she would have tugged right back.

I don't recall that this lady was much of a monkey-tugger. For some people it's more of a vocation, I guess. One would probably need to be fairly serious about it, in order to do it safely (like hang-gliding, and so on).

Handbags full of mace perhaps. With back-up hand grenades tastefully tucked into bras.

Some kids had really scary mums, who were probably practicing for monkey-tugging contests. I am often surprised by the small number of one armed adults one sees.

I'm a bit confused. Maybe I shouldn't have clicked "reply".

Sorry. We are rather leading your forum off topic.

Sorry Kat. I too [Bela Lugosi] am confused!

I am always confused, just the amount varies. It has similarities to me being in the s**t all the time, just the depth vaires.

Not on purpose, mind you. If we were doing it on purpose we'd say something like "I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike, I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it where I liiikee..."

But wait-maybe we could put it BACK on topic that way- I want to read your articles, I want to read them all, I want to read your articles, I want to win a monkey too..."

But...it didn't rhyme

Hmmmm, not very intellectual I know, but there you go

I once read a thriller
about a large gorilla
I once saw a monkey
who was no ones flunky
I once met a chimp
with a terrible limp

Wow...you win.