h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What exactly is the difference between a tea spoon and a coffee spoon? Is there one? And does it matter?
Also, is there any way of training fish to stir tea for you?

Yes, there is a major difference and it does really matter. The tea spoon is for stirring tea and the coffee spoon is for stirring something else. Coffee, I believe.

What if you want to stir Hot Chocolate???
Which spoon do you use, and why? Is there such a thing as a Hot Chocolate spoon?

Also, what sort of fish would survive in a cup of tea long enough to stir it for you without eating the sugar?

Surely a spoon is what you make it. I've had many, many minutes of fun deciding what exactly I could do with my rather sizable collection of spoons.
I even stirred soup, once.

i like to eat my tea with a spoon, am i a freak? Instead of drinking it i spoon it into my mouth. I also have a special long spoon for when i drink from my special tall green mug. Not only do i eat my tea i also eat my cofee, hot chocolate, milk and any alcoholic beverages.

No, I doubt very much you are a freak as I also eat tea with a spoon - but then I often use drinking tea as an excuse to eat more sugar-cubes...
As for using a spoon to drink alcohol - hmmm... You don't get those cocktails with cherries, lemon-slices, three umbrellas a sunbed and outdoor heated swimming pools, do you?

I suspect the only fish that may be used to stir a REALLY HOT cup of tea would be a dead one on a stick. Preferably the fish would be concave on one side and convex on the other, and if at all possible shiny (like a goldfish). This has 2 advantages. firstly it will stir the tea better that way, and secondly you can amuse yourself for hours by looking at your upside down reflection in the concave surface. Hope this helps.

It is said that all land life evolved out of fish in the sea (although mankind is directly descended from the Golgafinchiums in the B Ark), what sort of animals would evolve from fish in a cup of Really Hot tea?

extinct ones

What about the fish that are able to survive the hot temperatures near underwater volcanoes?

Then why did you ask ?

my freind is a fish and he stirs his tea, does this count? he does use a spoon

If you don't ask, you never learn...

Has anyopne tried using a table spoon in a tea cup?

Their too big in most cups

True...

Is it just me, or has everyone given up on this conversation?

Yes.

Thought so. Good.

2 weeks later: i haven't!

Has anyone used a tea spoon on a table?

Erm, how can you stir a table????
It sounds interesting, so please explain!