h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Shagbark checks his car and makes sure the surfboarde is in the back seat and drives to the distillary.

Maybe I should wait till after it closes to make my raid.

the Ghost of the Zaphodistas sneaks into the back seat...

ha ha you can't fool the crew of The Blood Shagbark!!

how long have you been here

Long enough. BWAAAHAAAA

well, maybe you can help me with this distillery.
My Blackbeard impression might not be enough hereabouts.

Lanzababy is watching the whisky raid through a very powerful telescope

sends message through intercom

Bring plenty back to The Blood!!!

Shagbark tells ghost be sure and radio crew that they will be getting the standard cut. It won't be long now.

It ought to be dark enough by now.
Shagbark puts flarfes in his false beard and draws his cutlass.
the ghost flies up and cuts the wires on the alarm system.
Shagbark pulls his pistol and shoots the lock on the front gate.
AAAARGGHH He says as he runs inside.

He lights the flares and runs for the vat room.
I wonder what lanzababy thinks of the show so far.

He finds two barrels of aged whiskey next to the vat and clamps anti-grav hoops on them.
A security guard in a side room phones in a report.
We had best skedattle before the constables arrive.

With the two barrels rolling in front of them the s make for the exit.

shagbark straps them onto the luggage rack of the car and heads out.
Word that pirates are attacking has reached Fort George but is dismissed as someone's over-active imagination.
The local constable decides to at least check it out but he arrives five minutes to late.

Arriving at the northern end of Loch Ness shagbark freemantles a motor launch and transfers his booty.He is soon steering a course beneath the stars back to the ship.

Hooooooraaaaaaaay! the sound echoes across to Shagbark

I hope you will join us for a celebration. I think that the Captain and Alectrician are propping each other up in the bar of this Hotel.

Don't ask me where I am, it's all a mystery!!

I have a tracking device that always lets me know where Captain Pierce is. I will be arriving shortly.

is that so? i thought i had a tracking device on you?

They aren't mutually exclusive

i wouldn't count on it

Shagbark and Lanzababy pull up alongside the Blood of the Zaphodistas.
A secret door opens below the figurehead.
Would you care to join me on a secret mission
shagbark disappears into the woodwork.