h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

after spending the last month wandering around this ship sleeping in odd corridors, under tables and the strange rooms that I have found, I think I finally have found one to call my berth. What from the outside looked like a perfectly normal door, from the inside looks like a flap.
The room is conical, about 25´ across. A soft white light diffuses down from the hole in the peak of the roof, about 30´ above. Directly below this hole are the ashes of a long dead fire in a circular fireplace about 4´ across. Around the fireplace is a lounging area, lined with sumptous furs, I can see a polar bear head, Lion feet and snark whiskers all amongst the comfy. Outside of this area is more useful furniture. A big iron bath with crows feet, bookcases, cupboards and a table. The previous occupant must have left in a hurry as the table is still laid, and scummy grey water is still in the bath. Otherwise everything is covered in dust.
Mmmm, i think that I can do something with this..

Suppose the first things to do is to go and order a barrel of to make the dusting tolerable (thirsty work, dusting). I´ll get these furs down to the launderette, empty the bath, and light a fire to get rid of the damp and stale smells..

Hi there! Welcome on board.

Interesting cabin, if you need any soft furnishings, clothes, waterproof kilts.....drop by the Sewing Room.

Thanks
seeing as me kilts turned into a pretty revealing mini
it looks like im going to ´be after a new warderobe
(although I may just keep it in case i ever feel that way inclined)
Which reminds me

haw!

welcome aboard. you may want to know that you are indian #2 on this vessel

Curses !
I thought i was being original..
Still, at least we can have a pow-wow
In the meantime Ive tacken delivery of
Got my furs done, and the place is starting to look respectable..
Lots of polished wood, Brass lamps on the walls, soft warm glow from the fire in the middle
I have given Previous Occupant a polish and sat him in a chair with a cigar and . Looks quite contented..

Well, you're the first MALE Indian...

Ahoy Cap'n! *salutes*

*addresses Ackalon* You got any ?????

Certainly Plato

Not really intentially an Indian you know..
Just liked the room..
Mind you, sounds even better for a powwow..
Nice to have philosophers dropping by..

no problem! I'll invite my friend Demosthenes over too, shall I?

*sips *

Perhaps we could trade opinions on the subjective nature of reality over ...

? Did i hear the word ? Please, I'd love some, especially if its Pennyroyal !!!

Ahh! Plato!! How are you this beautiful day? I realize I've been scarce around here for the last several days. I'm hiding from Jess. She's on the warpath. Something about several bottles of Talisker Scotch Whiskey disappearing from her private stores. Although, I would know nothing about that. . .

*says he as he sips something from a flask.*

Speak of the devil! Welcome, Demo!

Now then Ackalon... about that tea...

Its from Ceylon you know,
Did I ever tell you of the time I crossed to indonesia on a raft made of tea chests, just like these....
Tore open the T bags to make a sail....
So any idea where the missing whisky went then ?

*looks suspiciously at Demo*

Ahhh..
Jolly welcome it is too...
Have you seen my fine collection of whisky tumblers ?

did someone mention with ?

Ahoy Cap'n!
Think I'd rather have my with Rum..
More appropriate too..
Can I give you a spot of the Captain Morgan 78% in that...
Just the thing for a
and a size ...

Goodness me !
Seems I nodded off..
Everyones gone ?!
Must be lunchtime..

Hold it right there!

I'm ship's doctor. Haven't been doing my rounds as often, kind of waiting for business at Sickbay. Welcome.

Since it's lunchtime, we'll wait out the lack of everyone else with s and

mmmmmunchSlurp..
I should imagine you get quite a diverse range of ailments abord a ship like this..
Along with plenty of wooden legs and eye patches..
- hows the ?