h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh boy, simpulpost time! Just to clarify, that last posting of mine was a reply to Candi - hence the bit about the band.

But yes, Lady of the Lake - as with so many things, the first big step is to admit that there's a problem. People should seek help. I've done it before, and even though the results for me weren't as great as they have been for some others in this thread, I'm certainly going to do it again.

Hey Orm, no probs and good luck

First I'd like to thank you all for being so open. If people need to hear others being honest on a forum, it's definitely this one.

I've suffered from chronic depression for almost as long as I can remember, and quite severely since I was nine. I'm now on prozac, and have been for just over a year. The strange thing is, I still can't work out any reason for most of my 'downer' moodswings. It's almost like I have MPS sometimes, or Bipolar syndrome - but I don't. Sometimes the littlest things will get me down, and no matter what I do to try to cheer myself up, I can't. Other days, the fit will hit the shan (sic) continuously, and I don't seem to care.
Usually, though, my mood will be slightly lower than (it seems) the moods of the people around me are. I don't know why.

When I was sixteen, I had a particularly nasty and unexpected break-up, at almost exactly the same time that I finished high school, and was already ready for a change in lifestyle. So, I did two things. I started smoking pot (not a lot, just at parties and so on.), and I became a Goth. Please don't think that these things were counterproductive - I did both of these because I thought they would help me respect myself, and to make my life happier. I was watching myself very carefully, because I didn't want my life to be 'out of control' any more, and if I thought that either of those actions were having a negative effect on me in any way, I would have stopped.
As it was, I'm still glad that I did them. I stopped smoking drugs about two years ago - only because it wasn't making a lot of difference any more, and I couldn't be bothered with it. But I'm still a goth, and probably will be for life, now.
Just because I know that most people are not used to the gothic subculture, I repeat: THIS IS A GOOD THING. It's a way of accepting who I am, and it's a culture that I fit in with. The Goths that I associate with are among the kindest, most intelligent, caring people I know, and aren't self-destructive at all. Incidentally, there's a fairly accurate description of the gothic subculture at A473924.

I have been trying to make the choices in my life that steer away from depression and make me happiest, but even so, I am still depressed, and I suspect I always will be. I'm still on prozac, and I still go to counselling. Sometimes I want to die, but I know I don't have the resolve to do anything about it. Also I don't want that burdon on my friends and family. What scares me, though, is the thought of being old, and alone, and hating my life so much that I wish I'd killed myself at twenty-something instead. For that, I dread getting old.

I'll let you know if I find a way of increasing the quality of my life, and decreasing my depression.

s

I figured this was as good a place to put my own experiences as any.

I've been a Depressive since about 13. I'm not fully sure what 'caused' it, if any one thing did cause it.

I nearly failed sixth grade and my father put the fear of failure into me. When I got to High School (7th grade here), that fear of failure increased. Just being in a classroom would cause anxiety attacks. And an exam would just about have me crying. However, this was also a new environment and I never adapted that well to change.

In addition that was the year my father decided to leave my mother and I, which added more strain. Add to that a few personal issues I'm only just now (at 30) tackling and any one of those things, or all of them together, may have been the cause.

Even now I struggle with depression. I regularly have suicidal thoughts, I have bad days, I have good days (one friend noted there seems to be a 'manic' element because I have such quick, strong mood shifts).

However, I've survived, and, I believe, I'm getting on top of it. I also have a wife who is Depressive and several friends are, which has given me the chance to 'study' Depression from all angles.

I've noticed there is no such thing as simply being a Depressive. How it manifests itself is different for every one of us. How it can be helped, treated, or even cured, is just as different. For one friend, counselling was 'all' she needed. She had to go through a few counsellors to find someone she could trust and /really/ open up to, but once she did, she was on the mend.

For another friend, an anti-depressant such as Prozac was used. For this friend it seemed to work, though the lost of sex-drive from it caused her other problems. With another friend Prozac made the problem almost tragically worse.

Personally I've tried counselling, anti-depressants, herbal cures, meditation and self-hypnosis. Of all of those the latter seem to be doing the most good. For my wife, herbal cures appeared to be the best.

Regardless of what I tried, and how well, or otherwise, it worked, the one thing that kept me going was my few /real/ friends. Those who helped me through the bad times and didn't run. Without them I believe I'd be dead now.

Given all this I have the following advice:
Remember that there is no one true path to 'fixing' your problem. Don't get stuck on just drugs, or counselling, or whatever.

Secondly, it helps to have someone to talk to, to unburden yourself with. This could be a close friend,, or a trusted counsellor. And I mean /trusted/. if you don't trust them, you'll just make the problem worse because you'll stress about talking to them. If the first counsellor you see doesn't help, try to find another.

Give each 'cure' time. This isn't going to be fixed in a couple of days. However if you notice a drastic increase in the Depression, then stop the current treatment and look for a new one.

Take your life one day at a time. Try not to look to the future too much. For me, anyway, that causes more depression as not only do I have todays problems to worry about but tomorrows and next weeks and....

If you're seeking medical advice, try to find a doctor who knows what they're talking about and who is sympathetic. If you hear the phrase 'It's all in your head' or 'cheer up', then that doctor isn't right for you. It's also good if they're open minded about treatments other than drugs as they will usually be better at helping you find the /right/ treatment.

If you think 'natural therapists' are the way to go, then try to find someone registered with whatever the local natural therapist's associaton is. I've also found that since natural therapists are often more 'holistic' in their approach to treatment that you need to find one whom you trust, much like you would if you were seeking a counsellor

I personally recommend finding a good tape/cd/book on meditation and/or self hypnosis. These have helped me increase my self-confidence. Most of my Depression seems to stem from a lack of self-confidence, and any way I can build that up is good for me.

Something that may also help is finding good resources on Depression to give or show to friends. Some people can't quite get their heads around Depression and think saying 'cheer up' will fix it. In fact that may make it worse. If you can find something that will explain it to them, then they can be better prepared and you may find you have more support there.

I hope this is of use to people. I've put it all down despite seeing some of these points raised before simply because maybe I can put things a different way to incraease understanding, and the amount of help to those that need it.

In case anyone's interested, I did pay that visit to the . She's put me on anti-depressants, which are making me feel... well, sort of pleasantly odd!

So if I start saying nice things about the Conservative Party or Manchester United, please make allowances. It'll be the drugs talking.

How long have you been on the medication - most take at least a couple of weeks to have any effect. Sounds like Prozac or Seroxat. If so, be very, very careful if you drink alcohol while taking them!!

Actually, mine doesn't seem to have any affect with alcohol, and no warnings on the packet, either. Must be the brand. (Prozac - Aurorix)
Yay for me!

My tablets are something called Cipramil. There are no warnings about not mixing them with alcohol on the packet or the enclosed leaflet - and frankly, if they didn't react well with , then I'd have found out yesterday evening!

Hi again Jerms - you must be one of the lucky ones. Many people I know who have combined Prozac or Seroxat with alcohol (anything more than one or two drinks) have experienced complete personality transformations and ended up doing wild reckless things.For example, one friend seriously endangered her marriage and in another friend's case, punching a policeman and getting arrested!

Owtch! I haven't heard of that happening!

Hope everything goes well for you, Orm. Is sounds like it's starting to work already...

Yeah, good luck. my put me back on prozac again last week. Never works, but he does so like to try. I get the vicious circle that I'm on pills cos I'm depressed, but I'm depressed cos I'm back on the pills. Damn!

I've just finished nursing the migraine from hell. It started on Thursday night when I had two glasses of wine, then went to bed and suffered a horrendous set of nightmares and hence had a very disrupted night's sleep. As I said earlier I take Prozac, but it looks like it doesn't mix with alcohol at all. Avoid this combination like you would a band of roving Jehovah's Witnesses...

Hmm... I was on Prozac years ago, and drinking while using it never gave me headaches. But Prozac doesn't go well with alcohol, in the sense that drinking a lot of alcohol tends to stop Prozac from working properly.

Hey good luck Orm hope it works and if you start saying nice things about Man U I'll deffinately say something ...

I try to avoid the whole "getting depressed 'cause I'm on Prozac" thing - you already know what that kind of spiral does to you.
I tend to think of Prozac as more like a vitamin supplement. My body doesn't produce enough seratonin by itself, so it has to be helped. Just like vitamin C, in my mind.

Well, it works for me...

Thanks, Lady of the Lake!

And Jerms - I think your attitude is spot on.

Being depressed does NOT mean that there's something inherently wrong with you as a person. It needn't even mean that there's something very wrong with the situation you're in. It can just be a medical, chemical condition. And, whatever the reason for your depression, correcting your personal chemical imbalanace can help you move on to a better situation.

Exactly.

It took me so long to accept that depression was just part of my makeup and to think of it as an illness like any other, diabetes for example, and not because I was hopeless or had some huge character flaw. It took me a long time to forgive myself for being depressed, but once I managed to take that step, it did a lot for my self-esteem, and really helped.

I've often wished I responded to antidepressants. I'd love a 'magic bullet' that would just make it go away. But the only thing that's seemed to make an impact has been cognitive therapy, (which I mentioned in the first posting). It's a lot of hard work, but I've been a lot better in the last two years, and am relative symptom-free now.

To any of you going through a rough time: I know it's a horrible place to be. I've had some days that were so bad that I thought I couldn't stand it a moment longer. Hang in there. Try to be gentle with yourself. The worst of it will pass.

As someone said earlier in the thread: find someone who you can trust to talk to. Ideally someone who has nothing to do with your problems so you can be free and open about discussing it. Preferably a doctor who knows what they're doing and can offer you medication/hypnosis/psychotherapy or whatever works best for you. Someone who you can see on an ongoing basis who will support you through the worst times, and help you work on controlling it when you feel strong enough to tackle it.

Above all, remember it's not your fault, and you're not alone. There are many people out there who know what you're going through.

I'm doing my own version of Primal Scream at the moment. When it goes into the Manic bit I just go with it, scream and hit stuff until I feel better, and then I really do! Think I might stop the pills again, they're really doing nothing for me.

Hey guys - thanks for this thread, it's really made me feel better about my doctor giving me Seroxat. And thanks for the warning re alcohol. I was drinking a couple of nights ago, and had no ill effects, but I'll try to stay clear in future.

I've just been put back on antidepressants, Amytriptiline this time, after sinking again for a few weeks. My doctor said this medication will help me sleep, which is a big part of my problem at the moment. I've just had the first tablet just now, so I'll have to see if it works. I might be nodding off at the keyboard if it does......also, I've returned for more Art therapy, which has really helped me before as I think I mentioned earlier.
So now, I'm just sitting it out, hoping I can turn the corner soon. It's been really helpful reading this thread - thanks everyone who's shared info, advice and experience here, especially SmoB, who started the ball rolling. I hope it will continue. I'll let you know when I start to feel better.