A Conversation for Talking Point: Coping with Depression

My depression

Post 1

Beer Elf

I started feeling strangely around the end of September 2006. I lost my job, but I soon managed to find what I thought would be a dream job in the following October, it was around that time that I had a run-in with the Tax Credit Department ( Social Security or Welfare for non-UK members) as I had begun to work full-time again, they deemed that I had been paid £1000 too much and would clear this by not paying me any more money, leaving me £30 per week to feed and clothe myself and my two teenagers, after paying my rent. My daughter is studying to go to university, my son, after recovering from his depression has so far refused to find work for the last year, despite my pleadings.

My daughter has had her own problems at college, including various run-ins with members of staff, and she was diagnosed with an Autistic Spectrum disorder in her early teens but has also improved somewhat.

I lost my dream job at the end of February, the job was stressful in itself, and I don't feel that I had been properly trained, or dealt with as management seem to think I was. Part of the problem with the job was my inability to concentrate, I wasn't sleeping so well, my mind seemed to be full of "chatter" and I didn't feel able to retain information, therefore I didn't blame my former employers, and went quietly.

My GP prescribed Prozac, along with cutting out Caffeine and Alcohol, and I started to get side effects immediately, with shooting pains in my arms and legs that rendered me immobile, dizziness, confusion, and permanent thirst. I am now in the process of withdrawing from Prozac, with a view to prescribing amytriptilyne (sp?) A drug that seems to have worse possible side effects than the fluoxetine (Prozac) I requested either CBT or counselling at my first appointment, and have not heard from anyone for the past three months. Part of the problem, at least in my experience is that I lack the motivation to get out of the chair most days, let alone to chase up appointments, or apply for further help from Social Security. I am lucky that my daughter is around sometimes as she stops my brain getting crowded, and helps me concentrate on one thing at a time, instead of feeling overwhelmed. I still have suicidal thoughts most days, even though I can laugh at the birds in the street that I can see from my window. I think that as well as the stress that I have from being a single parent, the only reason that I am still alive is that I can't bear the thought of abandoning my children when they need me still.

Does anyone out there have any experience with Amitriptiline?

Thanks for listening

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My depression

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