h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Heros: tell me your powers, weaknesses, costumes and favourate pieces of soft fruit here. Then I can include them onto the page

Note that that last is important. Mine's guava.

I am called Larj Parz and I have very big muscles. If you could stuff the Incredible green Hulk inside Arnold Schwarzenegger then you'd be about half the size of me and not a very nice person. I would never do that as I am a very nice person.

My favourite soft fruit is my killing raspberry which I have attached to my thong.

By the way I am a superhero with very large muscles in case you didn't know that.

Hello, My name is Lucy Lastick but you can call me Lucy or L Lastick. You don't have to call me ma'am, I wouldn't be that formal... well not here anyway.

Powers? I lived in the darkest parts of deepest... now what was the name of that colony? Anyway I was in communion with the wild creatures and learnt how to survive on nothing more than half a cup of water and a dry crust. I can change the wheel on a Landrover and can fire a rifle with my eyes shut. I can skin any animal from a shrew to a giraffe - but I don't do much of that anymore. No giraffes in Sussex to speak of.

Anyway I always carry my trusty umbrella and a hanky soaked in tea tree oil. So I think I am well prepared to deal with the lower ranks.

Myself, I like the sea and spend most of my time by the water. However sitting on rocks and lureing sailors to their death isn't really my thing. I have a bird like body (with wings and claws, ever so useful don't you know?), but a human head and voice, which can be very powerful when used correctly. I would say that my main weakness is that I can be a bit of a bird-brain at times. As for costume, umm... feathers prehaps? And you don't get that much fruit out at sea.

Superhero fromore years than I care to think about. I have an underpant elastic gun and a vest string (always handy (TM) Pat. pending) My piece de resistance is my scratch and sniffology (TM Pat. Pending) which enables me to save some of the worse experiences I ahve had - mainly culinary - on my vest and to reconstitute them with a quick scratch.

I collect vest stains so if you come across any unusaula stains let me know and I'll see if I can add them to my collection.

I was born in the streets of France in the 1800s...I seem to recall a mother and father, but that was so long ago. I think there is a novel about me out there somewhere, or at least that is what I've been told.

But the novel ends at the barricade, and suggests I died. Not true. This spaceship landed, named Dora, and I got to meet a weird guy named Lazarus and his two identical twin sisters/daughters...its too confusing to explain here. Anyway my name is now Gavroche Long.

Powers:
ability to confuse, confound, bore, and drive insane others with long sentences, obscure words, and quotes from novels.
ability to imitate the sound of birds
ability to fit in small, cramped spaces

Weaknesses:
I have the strength of a 13 year old boy. I am a lot older, but I have decided to maintain this physical appearance. It has its drawbacks.

*Smiles proudly yet wearily as the conversation moves onto him. He is used to it.*

Well, I of course have the considerable arsenal contained in the infamous Grocery Bag of Good, not to mention my cloak of purest Freem. My mini-cannons, so experienced in the way of time travel, are only used in an emergency to conserve honour.
As for weaknesses...well, I'm not invincible, I'm just too cool to be in the same place as bullets, explosions, etc. Also, lets just say I have rather an aversion to the colour pink if over-exposed to it, plus the incident with the HyperGiglogic Fool of Tabryon left me slightly vulnerable to...the radiation emmited from clocks manufactured in Australia but which contain more than 200 components.
My favorite soft fruit is naturally the Advocado, a bizzare mix between a lawyer and a normal Avocado.

*After a few hours spent talking with the other superheroes about themselves, he exits dramatically to battle evil once again.*

*sneaking around*

I am a possum. I have brilliant night vision and hearing and an astonishing sense of smell. I have lightning fast reactions, sharp teeth and bristling whiskers which confuse and confound my opponents. I can also eat virtually anything, and am frighteningly agile.

My main disadvantage is that I'm about 12 inches long. Which makes me next to useless, basically. Although I do look rather cute in my grey furred, whiskery outfit.

*Using his extraordinary powers of smell detection, notices the vile stench of a member of STUMPED in the room!!! About to race forward to battle the evil spy and smite it in the name of all that is good and true in this world, he suddenly realises that he has little hope of succuss. So he tries alerting the others, but they are too busy discussing their legendary powers and the time when Uncle Heavy accidentally flushed his own head down the toilet last new year's eve. Dejected, he goes off to his home in the shrubbery*

*is no longer nearby, but the distant silhouette of her seems to have something less to carry than it had when it arrived*

Should i be accepted for membership of the group called Choppers, this is who I am.

My name is Ishhara and I am a derivation of Ishtar, the Mesopotamian Goddess of love,
procreation, fertility and war (neat job title huh?).

I am a mighty warrior - my people have called me 'Lady of Battles, valiant among goddesses' and I have fought in many wars, being
"covered with combat and arrayed in terror". My charriot is drawn by seven lions and I am a skillful archer.

I have a shocking temper - I told my father Anu to create the celestial bull or the "dead will become more numerous then the living." I journeyed into the underworld to rescue my lover
Tammuz. I was one of the most popular goddesses of the ancient civilisations and considered to be sovereign of the world due to love's
omnipotence.

I come armed with bow - my arrows are formed from wood from the tree of life and are flighted with feathers from the God's own falcons.

My special power is that for which my people named me 'Star of Lamentations'. I can bring discord among the closest brothers and friends forget friendship.

My favourite fruit? Why peach of course.

I didn't flush my head down the toilet, it was beadet

Ishhara, you may join the heros as far as I'm concerned. I'll update soon...

you are too kind!

Yeah, yeah, welcome and all that Ishhara - but could you leave the lions outside they keep licking off all of my best stains.

[Mewtwo] }Our suggested .... Hello?{

Eh?

[Mewtwo] }Our suggested bios:{

MEWTWO and VEKURA: Mewtwo is one of the most powerful Pokémon in existence. Vekura is the other of the most powerful Pokémon in existence. They both have excessive psychic powers, attacks, and defenses, and they can teleport to places they've been to before. Their only three weaknesses are dark-, bug-, and ghost-type Pokémon attacks, their twins, and a violent dislike for cheese. If one tries to combine the last two, they will be vaporized. (At least, Mewtwo did this to someone who tried.)

OK. I see. Well, we'll get it down soon.

[Mewtwo] }Good.{

[Vekura] {No, no, no. We're equal in power. It's supposed to be a joke: "Mewtwo is ONE OF the most powerful Pokémon. Vekura is THE OTHER of the most powerful Pokémon." Also, add "with twins" to the bit about being married.}