This is the Message Centre for Titania (gone for lunch)

Choreography of a Crowd

Post 1

Titania (gone for lunch)

Early morning rush hour
train after train arriving
doors bursting open
like dams bursting at flood

A busy river
a tidal wave of people
sweeping through the tunnels
lapping at the walls

Yet -
Can you see the pattern? The whirls?
Can you feel the current? The rhythm?

Driftwood caught in the current
no one colliding
no one stumbling
everyone steering free

Swiftly drifting
left, right, across
paying attention
all antennas out smiley - ant

Individual
yet general
Impersonal
yet considerate

See that woman making a soft curve
to avoid the man with a suitcase?
See those teenagers slowing down
allowing a zimmer frame lady to pass?

Brave souls navigating
against the stream
across the river
and succeeding

Mutual understanding
mutual consideration
mutual evolved ability
to survive in an ant hill


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 2

Hati

Nice way to see something that scares me irl. smiley - ok


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 3

Jackruss a Grand Master of Tea and Toast, Keeper of the comfy chair, who is spending a year dead for tax reasons! DNA!

smiley - cool


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 4

taliesin

Reminded me of Tokyo train/subway stations during rush hour smiley - yikes

BTW, what, pray tell, is a 'zimmer frame lady'?


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 5

Titania (gone for lunch)

Picture of zimmer frame courtesy of Google:

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:8zX9LWRYikkJ:www.newburyvolleyballclub.co.uk/zimmer-frame.jpg

I think that's the US name for it - can't remember what the British call it...


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 6

Jackruss a Grand Master of Tea and Toast, Keeper of the comfy chair, who is spending a year dead for tax reasons! DNA!

RJR


Zimmer frame is what the British call it smiley - biggrin


RJR


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 7

Witty Moniker

USAians call it a walker.

Ti, it sounds to me as if you were hovering all the action, taking it all in. smiley - smiley


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 8

taliesin

I see. As far as I know, Canucks refer to them as 'walkers', generically, and the wheeled ones oxymoronically as 'rolling walkers' smiley - erm

I must say I prefer 'Zimmer' smiley - smiley..

A 'google' reveals that the Zimmer company produces these and other orthopoedic devices...

So this is akin to the famous adjustable wrench, commonly called a 'crescent' wrench, because the Crescent tool company popularized it.

~~~~~~~~~~

btw, I like the driftwood analogy. I often feel like a bit of wood, haplessly tossed about by the capricious waves and eddys...
smiley - zen


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 9

Hypatia

Lovely, Ti. smiley - applause

I've been meaning to ask. Do you write poetry in English? Or Swedish and translate?


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 10

Titania (gone for lunch)

Without h2g2 I would never have discovered that I can write - eh - stuff that people enjoy reading. It still feels a bit presumptuous to actually call it poetry...

In my teenage years I made several attempts to write poetry in Swedish, but I never managed to get the words to flow, and never found any rhythm.

Then one winter day, when I had been for a walk in the forest, I wanted to share the experience with my h2g2 friends. I started writing a short story about it.

I began writing it in English because that's how I do when I speak English - I don't think in Swedish and then translate into English, but I think in English from the start.

I really wanted to convey the atmosphere in the forest, so I took great care when choosing my words, I switched one, replaced another. By the time I was ready and gave it a final read through before posting, I felt a sort of flow in the text.

Intrigued, I started breaking the sentences up into shorter lines - and tadaa! It almost looked like a poem! I was baffled - surely I hadn't written a poem - in *English*? Because I *knew* I couldn't write poems.

Well, judging from the comments I got, people did see it as a poem, and I was thrilled!smiley - boing

But most of the stuff I write is done the same way as that first time. I observe something that I want to tell people about. I take care in choosing my words when trying to describe it. And sooner or later, there's that feeling of some sort of flow in the words.

To me, rather than poems, they feel like contemplations, or short stories. And I've found it much harder to get that 'flow' when writing in Swedish, so I prefer writing in English.


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 11

Hypatia

They are excellent, regardless of what you call them. So whatever you're doing - don't change! I always enjoy them. You have the ability to create an atmosphere that jumps out at people. Impressionable in a vivid, yet gentle, way. smiley - rainbow


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 12

taliesin

http://www.webster-dictionary.org/definition/poetry

"A smiley - rose by any other name..."

smiley - biggrin


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 13

Santragenius V

I'll just add my smiley - applause to the list. I do like your ability to contemplate over a moment - in that respect this reminds me about the previous one you did about sitting doing some waiting at the Stockholm central station smiley - smiley

Funnily enough, I seem to reflect in a somewhat similar way - though my musings seem to prefer to come out as prose. At least they're in more and longer lines, sticking together in paragraphs smiley - winkeye

Now - if only I could make myself take the time to convert the half dozen contemplations that sit in my Palm at the moment to somewhat decent writing... *sighs*

The urge to do them seem to be stronger in some periods of time than in others. Or I'm just too lazy...

Good then, that you keep up smiley - ok


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 14

Gw7en, Voice of Chaos (Classic)

Beautiful, Ti! smiley - applausesmiley - hug


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 15

Titania (gone for lunch)

Well Santra - I enjoy reading your 'contemplations' too - we seem to share the appreciation for nature and the change of seasons.

Converting your Palm notes - can't you just copy and paste them in the - the - dang, forgot what it's called - Palm Utility thingy?

In Swedish I'd call my writings 'betraktelser' - is there a Danish word corresponding with it?


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 16

Santragenius V

Well, sure I can (though atm it must go via my w**k PC as I haven't dared try establishing sync'ing with two machines)

But they're not in a - ummm - finished state. So ideally they should be transferred and polished. And it's the last of those steps that seem to be buried in some kind of quicksand...smiley - erm

'Betragtelser' probably could be used smiley - smiley I don't know if it is really a proper word, but it'd be understood. 'Overvejelser' might be another - but maybe reflects more thinking than seeing...

(and it's morning so I'm not at my sharpest smiley - winkeye)


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 17

Santragenius V

*repeating that last point*

smiley - blush - and smiley - ta, btw...


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 18

Blue-Eyed BiPedal BookWorm from Betelgeuse (aka B4[insertpunhere])

smiley - tit
Ti, this was a wonderful flowing piece of work. Thanks for sharing the "how to" of your craft. I'd not realized what you went through in order to get to your finished product. That's a rare insight and it makes sense to handle it that way, putting your thoughts on paper in the order and with the flow you 'experienced' at the time you observed the event.
smiley - bigeyes
I was swept up in the poem at the point you likened the throng of people stepping from the trains as "like dams bursting at flood". You depicted the organized chaos as "sweeping" and "lapping", yet you could visualize the fractal patterns, the rhythm and pulse of a collective entity. Your description of the types of movements--action/reaction--rang so true, as anyone who's been in such situation could attest. If one is new to it, unsure of where to go, how to proceed, I'm certain they'd feel just like a piece of "driftwood". I also caught your use of the juxtaposition of "impersonal" yet "considerate". That's not always the case in our larger cities. Glad you live in a society where manners are still considered an asset in daily living.
smiley - hug
When I read the passage about "a zimmer frame lady", I thought you were using an adjective, meaning something like 'zaftig' (heavyset, well-proportioned). Thanks for clearing up my personal ambiguity so I now know what to call those walking-aid gizmos.
smiley - winkeye
I especially enjoyed the final stanzas describing those folks who need to cross the 'sea of humanity' in order to reach their goal, and the diligent effort and tact it requires to do so. Again, your observation that they do it without adversely impinging upon the rest of the throng was delightful. I can still see those "[b]rave souls navigating" carefully, gently slipping into a gap, deftly merging with one flow of the current, only to side-step into another counter-stream to backtrack a few paces in order move closer to their intended destination. Not in a rush, watchful and observant of the foot traffic's ebb and flow , gauging the tide and its possible perturbations, taking advantage of each change in direction.
smiley - run
B4isitatacafe&watchtheworldgoby


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 19

Titania (gone for lunch)

Eh, B4 - you observed all that in what I wrote?

I mean - of course you did!smiley - biggrin

Your comments could be made into a poem by themselves actually - quite eloquent!


Choreography of a Crowd

Post 20

Titania (gone for lunch)

Yesterday, I happened to arrive at the main railway station smack bang in the middle of the afternoon rush hour - and what a pleasure it was....smiley - bigeyes

No, really - when I say pleasure, I mean pleasure. So pleasing to the eye to watch the even, never ending flow of people, smooth moves, and yet again those going across and against the stream seemingly so easily...

Some tourists stopped in the middle with huge suitcases? No problem, just flow around them.

A queue at a ticket counter? No problem, just some minor waves.

The sheer beauty of it - like a performance on stage, meticulously coreographed.

And that got me thinking - how do all these people know whether to steer left or right?

The body language is so discrete as to almost being imperceptible - but yet, the clues are there, however subtle.

So I focused on my own signals - ah, I seem to aim my look in the direction I'm going. If I'm approaching a narrow passage, I tend to ever so slightly push forward one shoulder and pull the other shoulder back to indicate if I'm steering left or right.

Body language - either you get it, or you don't...


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