h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've been suffering from insomnia for about fifteen years, and the only cure I've found that really works is alcohol - a fourpack of lager or a bottle of red wine in the two or three hours leading up to bedtime and I sleep like a log. On the downside, if you do this every day, your liver's not going to last too long.

There is a normal sleep pattern consisting of deep sleep and REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep (I think). Your body and mind need this sleep pattern to stay healthy. Alcohol may help you to sleep, but it also screws up your sleep pattern so that the sleep you do get is not as restful / recuperative as it should be.

My mother-in-law also suffers from insomnia. Fortunately she's retired so she can catnap during the day if she needs to.

The gigantic flying lizard with a positive attitude is right. Alcohol, consumed in somewhat larger quantities (ie. I forgot the amount), does make you sleep but it inhibits REM sleep, which is just what your noggin needs to function properly. The funny thing is, nobody exactly knows why REM sleep is so important. Some say that it's a kind of a "refill" for neurotransmitters, and other say that it provides the brain with a method to parse all the sensory gunk that came in during the day.
I think that this whole REM issue might warrant a guide entry? Provided that I find my (neuro)psych book and magically develop the ability to write sensible text, I might even do it.

Anyhow, I bet lots of us can vouch for the tranquilizing effects of King Alcohol, but how many can say they felt rested and energetic the morning after?

The longest bout of ensomnia I have suffered has been 9 days. Usualy the sound of a fan or my stereo turned on to static with the low frequencies turned up to high. When that fails I get the trusty bottle of bushmills and pour myself a nall shot. Antihistimines tend to work well also.
And, please. do write something on rem sleep. It would definitely be a worthy entry.

Sorry. "INSOMNIA".

Yeah, I'm not actually recommending you do it, just saying that as a genuine long-term sufferer of insomnia, it's the only thing I've found that guarantees you get to sleep (although pass out might be a more accurate term). The quality of sleep is obviously lower, although while I was at university I used this method quite regularly and always felt fine the next day. This was probably at least partially due to the fact that I didn't get up until one in the afternoon; the quality of sleep being slightly less important when you get about twelve hours of it. I suffer less these days, working nine to five regulates your sleeping patterns a bit better than the university lifestyle.