h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*peers into the gloom*
*hears distant chittering sound and the faint background hiss of a very large sound system at rest*

Mike?

Down Styx, down boy. Quorthon is not fionished with you yet. Go back until I've written up your profile. There's a good hell-rat

Hi Lil

Just about to officially declare the old conversation here DEAD

*steps forward hesitantly*
Yah, I was just commenting on that in the next room. I can't believe the change can be so radical, from my Art Nouveau to your... Norse Rustic?

Mike I think you could turn down the strobe frequency just a little, this isn't a high BPM garage or techno place is it

Looks good. How dark and foreboding do you want the music? I'm sure I could come up with a few things that'd take your fancy. Myself I'm more into the current US punk type stuff, Green Day, Blink182 than Slipknot or that ilk. Oh well never mind, I'm sure I've just mortally offended someone.

Aha! Looking good! Those stacks could do some serious damage with a bit of Exodus' Toxic Waltz coming out of it.

Swing around and around and your injury bound,
Waltz it up. The Pit is it!
You can take your chance on this rough new dance,
If you dare to dive in.
There are some who try, but they won't survive.
They're not fit cos they're wimps.
You must excercise to help you crucify,
With us. Exodus.

Everybody's doing the Toxic Waltz
Kick your friend in the head and have a ball
Come in and do the Toxic Walt
Slam your partner against the wall!


Fire It UP! Fire It UP!

*Begins to get her bearings*
Why, he's connected his rooms to a cavern! Those ARE stalactites up there, aren't they? And it looks as if the cave continues on the other side of this pit ... you can feel the air moving. This room is so big an the light flickers so, I can't tell. god, I hope there aren't any bats.

Well, the acoustics must be out of this world.

Wow! I like what you've done with the place. Suddenly I have a near irresistable urge to practice dark rites and rituals while listening to Type O Negative's "Bloody Kisses" album. But could you get this bat out of my hair please? I think it's trying to nest.

Yikes! *ducks* Here, let me help. Oh, it's a baby fruit bat.
*bats skitter in and out of the strobe-lit smoke then suddenly form a tight group and fly out of the cave*
They won't hang around once Mike A cranks up that stack.

Too bad we can't get them to mosh, eh? Oh, yes, I've brought a pit warming gift. *pulls large object out of thin air* Here you are, I hope it goes with the decor.
*sets down the object, which appears to be large reenforced crate with small air holes spaced along the sides. it begins rocking violently back and forth, and strange rasping noises and growels issue from it.* *the crate begins to smoke*
Oh, and you might need this too. *pulls a fire extinguisher out of the air and sets it atop the crate.*
Now don't forget, he's just a baby, but I'm sure he'll do well here.
Bye now

Methinks it is only fair to let you lot choose the music first...I like the sound of Babel's ditti

btw Phil: I like Slipknot :-0

*Styx twitters nervously at the side of the crate*
Whatever could this thng be? Uuuuhhh...anyone want to have a look inside?

Watch out for falling stagaltights. And bats of course.

Well, I'm pretty good with animals ... if it's an animal.

Maybe we should ask Affi to help; he's got special equipment for stuff like this. Or should we use your pentagram?

*starts pushing the crate into the pit*

Oh well, I thought I get some response mentioning Slipknot

I do like the smoke rolling down into the pit. It's a nice touch.

OK, is the crate completely inside the pentagram?

You think I'm moving that thing? You got another thing coming!

I'll move the marshall stacks if asked nicely, or even get up onto the lighting rig to run a follow spot, but move that crate, it's a flat NO

oof! *pushes crate then walks around it and checks perimeter of pentagram* Yes, that does it. Now when he opens it, whatever is in there will stay there.

*looks around* I hear something. God I wish I could see into the far shadows, but these smoke machines make it impossible.

I don't think they're quite smoke machines any more, they might have been in a previous life.

Do you think we could find the mixing desk and put on some music while we wait.

I'll leave that to you. If it was up to me I'd put on the Toccata and Fugue in D Minor and REALLY rattle those stalactites. *opens thermos* Glad I brought this with me -- it's dank in here. Bit of coffee, Phil?

*thing in cage twitches and kicks, causing crate to jump slightly*

I'll pass on the cofee.
I was thinking along similar lines to that, but it is a bit obvious isn't it

Tries hard to think of something along the right lines but comes from out leftfield...fails

We could always just annoy him by putting some folk or the Bee Gees (New York Mining Disaster rather than, Tragedy) on

Whatever you put on, Joan Baez, Britney Spears or Slayer, it's all going to come out spooky in a place like this.

Talking about Slipknot, a revised version of my soon-to-be-officialised article on them popped up on my homepage two hours ago . It's one of my favourites.

Now, the thing in the crate is inside the 'gram, but how do you get it out? With some Divine Intervention?