h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What do the iTc do for us the viewing public, they allow untrue and misleading advertising to be Aired on UK TV services . Why why why do people believe that companies such as Weight Watchers can deliver them form Obesity. Why do the iTc allow them to perpetuate this myth , when it is only them selves that can do this by Stop stuffing their faces with Food .

The iTc are actually quite a good organisation. They actually fined ITV quite heavilly for cutting too much out of films such as Robocop, thus making what little plot there is even less interesting. As for weight watchers, if one follows their rules to the letters, one will lose weight. However, just by making changes to ones diet will give the same effect. Note the huge amount of small print on most ads now!

And have you ever seen a police stop a car to check out some none-ironed cloths will a puppet head
bangs to alod of crappy music.

In real life of course.

The thing that amuses me is the iTc rulings which follow every other edition of Watchdog where they say that they have upheld a complaint of unfair treatment by the program of some company or other. The rulings are usually a year or more later than the original program, by which time the company has probably ceased trading and the owner committed suicide.

A phrase involving horses and stable-doors springs to mind...

The ITC may be working against factual error, but when can we expect some sort of taste policing for adverts? We have weightwatchers which most people will ignore as they do little more than make bean tins more pastel-coloured. Now, though, we have the diet tango™ ad "not eat willy-nilly" against that stupid thing where the daft bint claims she can "eat an entire pizza" before greedily stuffing an entire very thin slice of thin-crust into her mouth and taking a tiny bite. Eating an entire pizza means eating an entire pizza and this should be shown to be the case. Their next move should be to ban the use of blue liquid anywhere on television. Thirdly, I recall that newsreader Julia Sommerville was almost bollocked by the fuzz for taking a picture of her child in the bath. What, then, would the police make of the myriad baby adverts in which people are forced to either hear Chris Evans' voice, see a hand trailing over a baby's arse or both. If they can show babies' arses on TV when people are eating their tea
they can show other arses too, preferably those that people might wish to see. It would please me greatly if SMKB were knackered for child porn. Anyway, at the very least they could demand that a right-thinking person prepares a small
subtitle to acompany adverts, such as "this is quite funny", "this wouldn't even get a laugh from an American sitcom audience" and "don't look now if you don't want your day to be spoiled by Chris Evans' voice". That last one would save many TVs from being punched and kicked.

A mate of a mate's name is Chris Evans. He is also in media. Had he have registered his name a mere week earlier then the ginger bloke on C4 would have had to have used a different name. True.

His name is legion, for he is many. He are many, sorry. They are many. Their names are legion, for they are many. D'you think it's worth everyone registering their names in case another of CE's ilk arise?

Doc U soaps are good example of the lack of action from the iTc they portray themselves as factual accurate and True But, as anyone with the required minimal amount of Grey matter knows that the are no more than situation drama /comedy staged for the viewing public !

What? You mean that curmudgeonly old Polish bloke who was giving the police strife was only a character? Damn. I wanted to be like that when I grow up.

I think it's only a matter of time before someone makes a fly-on-the-wall docu-soap about a TV crew filming a fly-on-the-wall docu-soap.

You're back. Haven't heard from you for a while. Sprogs ok?
With all this vast plethora of digital TV and the large number of channels they'll feel the need to foist upon us, we ought to expect an entire channel of "real"-"life" docu-soap-coms. They might be bad but they're better than the american chat-shows featuring the stupidest people on earth that my flatmate appears to really enjoy watching. She is american but she's over here now and ought to know better. She would, were it not for the docusoaps. For that final touch of existential weirdness, they should make one about people making one about a camera crew filming a DIY/gardening program where they're building an bright pink outdoor barbeque on which a celebrity chef will later prepare something in twenty minutes using only the flesh of an actor pretending to be trailer-trash. On a diet.

Long live Jerry Springer ! As long as there are 24 Stone Females with Double digit IQ's fighting over 8 Stone Males with Single Digit IQ's , throw in some Paternity suits , some Silicone Lizzies with inflatable breasts and badly dyed Big Hair Blonde and Guest attempting to beat seven kinds of bells out of each other, Now That’s what I call entertainment. Venessa , Opra , Kilroy etc.. have not got a clue .

Be fair. Kilroy did do that thing where he persistently ignored some old codger on the grounds that he didn't have anything to say. Tricia does have some deeply amusing 15-year-old girls on their secod pregnancy trying to convince the 14-year-old fathers to stop going out sniffing glue and settle down as a family. If it weren't for the fact that these people might actually be out there in the street it'd be funny. It seems so much worse when they speak with a British accent and therefore seem real, rather than being Ameican and therefore unlikely to ever bother us.

Well, ****** ** ** **** ** *** ****** ******* **** ** ******! And don't you forget it!

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Yup. I'm back! Sproggs still OK (smallest is 1 today). At first I couldn't figure out where they came from, but I've sussed it now! All I need now is a docusoap to show me what it's like to have the snip (ouch).

There was one the other day with some 29-year old thick-as-pig-droppings scouser and his large-breasted 19-year-old wife. He's already got three kids and she has none. He wants to tie her down by getting her pregnant but had a vasectomy after his last child. He's unlikely to get it on the NHS as he's already spawned three offspring that he doesn't give half a cabbage about.
This is all irrelevant, but it is amusing to watch people picking the petals of freedom of the flower of life and throwing them heedlessly to the wind.
Get those little plastic implant things instead of your tubes cut. It's not the fact that it's reversible but the fact that spontaneous regeneration is less likely to occur.

Hi! I've been reading all the above, and I couldn't agree more. What I want to know is, how come the bosses of the telly stations think that putting all these people who fell into the gene pool while the lifeguard was off duty is in any way entertainment? I frankly don't care what these morons get up to, as long as they keep well away from me! They should use the huge salaries they pay the presenters to make something interesting.

Techy moment: I read today that someone complained to the ITC about an ad for one of the major IT manufacturers (can't remember which one) because it used the phrase "now running the reliable Windows NT"! If you're going to lie in your adverts, you might at least make it less blatant...