h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's all very well for the Hungary millions, but what of the Bulgaria millions? The Slovakia millions? The Albania millions? (That's enough Eastern European countries. - Ed)

RF

Testicles for all..........

I wish I knew the source and could remember the percentage... I'll call it 10% - 20%... Anyway, whatever percent it was...


A goodly portion of the American public, when polled, believed that humans could regrow limbs.

(Maybe it was 51% ).

There is a rather nice Chinese phrase for 'homosexuality' which translates as 'Man Dragon Preference'.

Surely drag-on would indicate a transvestite.

<>


Eeeeuuuuwwww. but that's gross!

A juxtaposition of words and ideas in the above reminds me of a former colleague who did National Service in Malaya.

As you can imagine, the loos in the Malayan jungle would have been pretty rudimentary. Anyway, he said he had been sat on the loo for a while, conemplating the world, etc etc. When he sttod up to go he happened to look down as he pulled is trousers up - to see an enormous leech attached firmly to one of his testicles. (Apparently leeches quite liked to secrete themselves under the loo seat)

Double eeeuuuuwwww! Leech on testicle - yikes, I bet that hurt!

It's unlikely to hurt at all. Leeches secrete an effective local anaesthetic before they bite so you could carry one around all day and not notice.

F

YUMMMMMMYYY

(Takes a quick shufti)
Nope. Nothing lurking down there today.

There's a story of a famous diva who wanted to lose weight, so she drank a glass of champagne containing a tape-worm. Unfortunately, the story seems to be an urban myth, as it is told about many different people. It's not clear whether the tape-worm would survive the immersion in champagne.

who did you hear it was?

Maria Callas

There was an interesting epidemiological case in which a number of people of around the same age in an area of the American Midwest were found to be infected with variety of tapeworm indigenous to (I think) Asia. This was eventually traces to their having taken a particular brand of 'diet pill' in the 1930s. Said pills consisted of dormant tapeworm larva within some sort of shell.

Do you suppose they were entitled to use the Royal 'we'?

That sounds like another Urban Myth to me.

On a modern Western diet a tapeworm (or two) would have absolutely no impact on a person's weight. In fact it meight even be beneficial:

http://my.webmd.com/content/article/87/99477.htm

Worms have been tried as a treatment for Crohn's disease and irritable bowel syndrome.

F

'Fraid not, Mr Gnomo (Hey! There's an idea for you!)

I've not tracked down the epidemiological story - however, I've checked on snopes.com (a pretty good source for debunking urban legends). They have the Maria Callas story, and some other stuff about tapeworm. It seems that such diet pills were, indeed, marketed in the 20's and 30's)

As I recall, dieters were meant to take a second, de-worming pill after a few weeks, but many forgot and lived in blissful symbiosis for many tears.

Tapeworm were prevalent in Ancient Rome. Catullus wrote a poem in which one emerges from the corner of someone's eye. They can come out of any orifice, you see.

STOP PRESS! You can still buy tapeworm pills on the www!

They say that Maria Callas did suffer from tapeworms, but not as a result of an attempted diet.

They also say that diet pills claimed to contain tapeworms in the 20s and 30s.