h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

How do I know that anyone I meet online is a real person, and not just a bot? Or even that everything isn't just a figment of my imagination and that it really does exist? In fact, how do I know anything at all? I know I exist, for to wonder weather I exist, I must exist, therefore I exist.

1. If the Bot is clever enough then you won't know, it would have passed the Turing test see http://www.h2g2.com/A168365

2. That depends on your current state of mind (mine can't handle it either)

3. I think therefore I am (I think that was Decarte)

I don't think you can know. Your experiences are based on you perception of your surroundings. Experience alters perception. How do you know that when you look at the sky, for example, that other people see the same "blue" that you see?

I think I'd better jack out of the Matrix now...

I've thought about this, too... how do I know that you two are real people... YOU may know if you exist, but I don't. But if nothing is real, what the heck is everything, and why am I the one to experience it?

Thats YOUR problem
It can't be mine if I don't exist

The original Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy proved that nobody exists. As I recall, the proof went like this:

The universe is infinite. In this infinite space you have an infinite number of galaxies and hence an infinite number of stars. These stars are orbitted by an infinite number of planets. However, not every planet is capable of supporting life, so there is a finite number of inhabited planets and hence a finite number of beings in the universe. Any finite number divided by infinity is 0 (near as damn it), so the average population of a planet is 0. Hence, anybody you meet is the product of your own deranged imagination.

I'm off to imagine my husband!