h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

WHY DO PEOPLE CALL THEIR CHILDREN MORAG OR SESSLE?

Morag is a genuine name (Scottish, I think) so I have no problem with it. Sessle, on the other hand, looks and sounds as if some one couldn't spell Cecil. (I assume that you aren't the person who mis-spelled it!?!) I am dead set against weird names. Bob Geldof and Paula Yates should be strung up by something painful for naming their daughter 'Fifi Trixibelle'!

Also, "Zowie Bowie" and "Moon Buggy Zappa".

Actually it's Moon Unit Zappa. Much more sensible.

Actually I think 'Zappa' is the silly bit.

If you think that's bad... I grew up with a girl who actually was given the name .... ~gasp~.... Jane... ~shock horror~ ... What some parents will do to their poor off-spring...

Now Greebo is a far more normal name... don't you think????

Actually, I find it amusing that people can decide to name their children whatever they want, and then the children (until they are of age) are stuck with the name. Those with eccentric parents can be teased by other children, while those who have common names will wind up having trouble finding their own identity when they hear their name spoken over and over again to different people. It is an unique problem: how to find an uncommon enough name to give the child a sense of identity without facing harassment over a name which can be made into a joke.

I once read of a couple who were desperate to find a name for their daughter. They wanted a name that couldn't be shortened or messed around with. Eventually they decided on 'Amber' and were perfectly happy with their choice until they heard their daughter being referred to as 'Amburger'.

Then there was the woman who was quite happy with her name (Ida) until she 'phoned a friend. The 'phone was answered by her friends young son, who called out 'Mum, it's Ida the Spider!' (Kids, who'd have 'em!)

I'm not sure anyone "lies" there name, they all try and change it it someway. How many of us even use a close resemblance of their real names in these fora (forums?)?

I know myself that I use the name I am most comfortable with here, which is slightly different to the one my real life friends, and totally different from the one I use at work.

I am all in favour of invention of new names, especially surnames, think about it, names like Smith, Cartwright, Miller, Cooper all stem from honorable crafts and trades. We need new surnames, Webmaster, Accountant, Producer, Spin-Doctor, Cosmetic_Surgeon perhaps.

Chris Scientific Officer (or C Hawke or !"£$%^ or :@~!£$)

I never use my own name in forums. it's scary doing so as someone in there might know me or try to find me. The reason I use the name I do is too long and complicated to explain.

My h2g2 nickname comes from a book on Chinese horoscopes that I was given some years ago - I was born in the year of the Cheerful Dragon. I use a nickname rather than my real one because it's the persona I want to project. If I used my real name, then it would just be the 'every-day' me on these forums, not the inner me. (That sounds a bit new-age or pretentious, but I'm not sure how else to put it, so I hope you know what I mean!)

I'm not unhappy with my real name, in fact I quite like it. Which is just as well because I've had it for long enough!

My name is Mary Adele. I go by Adele b/c in kindergarten, there were 3 other Marys and I (and the teacher!) wanted to simplify things. I use the Forum name I do because I've recently been listening to a collection of music entitled A Winter's Solstice, and silver solstice was nice and alliterative. As for weird name stories...
A friend of mine's father is an ER doctor, and he likes to collect odd named that come through. Once he treated a girl named Female (pronounced fuh-MALL-ee). When she had been born and the hospital staff had given her the hospital armband saying FEMALE SMITH, her parents thought she had already been named. Also, once my science teacher was substituting in a class that had twins named Lemongelo and Orongelo (spellings are guesses.) When he got to those names on the roll, he pronounced them lemon jell-o and orange jell-o.
silver solstice

I think on this point, the French have a sensible system going. A friend of mine who lives in Paris wanted one of his son's first names to be the middle name of another friend of mine. This other friend's middle name, while being very uncommon as a first name (I think it was the surname of his great-aunt or suchlike), does actually sound like a perfectly normal, sane first name. However, as the French authorities hadn't come across this name being used before, they required to see the relevant birth certificate, to assure themselves that the name wasn't just made up, before they allowed the name to be used.

Whenever the media do report daft names, they rarely seem properly critical. I'd prefer an interview along the lines of :
'So, you called your kid after the entire Liverpool football team - don't you realise how childish and stupid that is, you sad, obsessive loser?'

That said, it's not just the weird 'Fifi Trixibelle's, or football-team-kid that have the problem. There are loads of names given to children by snobbish parents that must be hard to live down for any child that ever meets the general population, let alone one that ever enters the state school system. Anyone called Tristan, Isolde, Crispin, or Petronella may as well carry round a flag saying
'My parents are stuck-up tossers who want everyone to think I'm posh',
because unfortunately, that's what loads of people they meet _are_ going to think.
Trying to pigeonhole or predestine children by their names is as inexcusable as forcing religion down their throats.

My name is Rigmor. Ok.. I am Norwegian, maybe that can excuse my parents? I find that people from other countries that Sweden, Denmark, Germany and France simply can't pronounce it..
Also I get comments like "What.... ?? Have you forgiven you parents yet??" and "WHY?"
Personally I don't mind my name. It might not be the prettiest name on earth, but it's ok enough.
And I've survived so long..

My parents decided to name my sister after our grandmothers - all three of them (my maternal grandfather married twice). My sister rejoices (or otherwise) in the names 'Anna Elizabeth Erna' - my mother is German. That left them at a loose end when I was born - they were hoping for a boy and they didn't want to name me after my aunts. I am very grateful for this. My dad's sister's names are Dorothy, Gladys and Beryl, and my mum's sisters are Gesa (prounounced Gaysha), Ilse (pronounced Ill-sir) and Hede (pronounced Hay-de). So, either I'd have been cursed with dreadfully old-fashioned names, or names no one could pronounce. In the end they named me after some friends of theirs. Unfortunately two of the friends were male. So I'm stuck with the names 'Irene Regina Lesley', after Reginald was shortened and Leslie was feminised (the names, not the people). I don't mind. In fact, over the years I've grown to like my names.

When I went on my first date with my wife, we had a long conversation about what we were going to call our children. She had all sorts of crazy ideas, all but one of which I immediately said NO to, and I had all sorts of boring ideas, all but one of which she immediately said NO to. We managed to compromise on one boy and one girl name, and ended up calling our son neither of those things, but nevertheless something that we both loved and don't regret at all.

One of my criteria was a "top set" name. A teacher going by "Frank Chalk" had a blog in the early 2000s which he made into a book called "It's Your Own Time You're Wasting". One of the anecdotes was the "top set bottom set game", a game played by teachers in the classroom at the start of term. Simply list the given names of all the kids in the top set, and all the kids in the bottom set. Colleagues have to guess which list is which. They ALWAYS get it right. Top set names are Andrew, David, Michael, Elizabeth, Jane, Rachel and so on. Bottom set names are Shaznay, DuWayne, Chardonnay, Kevan, you know the sort of thing.

No child of mine is having a bottom set name...

Kevan is the Irish spelling of Kevin. IMO it's only a bottom set name if child isn't Irish or of Irish ancestry.