h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I was supposed to get married the summer 2004. Now it looks like it will be already summer 2003... as my grandfaher might not live until 2004 due to illness.

Now.... as current being in my last year of university, money is not exactly the easiest thing. To make it harder, me and my finacee are from different countries, and we may have less than a year to arrange everything.

As I have never gotten married before, please tell me what this "everything" includes? I know we have to sort out menues and invitations and seremony, but what else?
how long should the organisation take? And how can it be done well, but inexpensive?
Orginially we wanted to have a viking wedding, but it might be little time for arranging that?

-online-

Look out for Wedding/Bridal Fairs in your area. Local wedding venues, specialist bakers, dressmakers/hirers, florists, photographers etc have stalls and this is one way of getting some idea of costs.

Wedding venues in the Summer months are often booked up a year ahead and if you have some idea of what sort of ceremony you want, civil, religious etc., this will be the first thing to book.

I have been to posh weddings followed by the whole reception and evening party thing as well as Registry Office followed by pub meal and enjoyed them all.

The main thing is to work out a budget, decide what you want and don't be bamboozled by anyone else into altering or spending more on your plans (unless they offer to pay for it). It is your special day so make sure its one you will enjoy and have lovely memories of.

If parents are paying they should have a say. If they're not, they shouldn't, but don't knowingly offend anyone's religious feelings.
My son and his wife arranged a perfect wedding in Dublin in June, with over a year's preparation. Friends here in HK arranged a pretty good one with 3 months lead-in.
List - in this order
1.Religious or civil? Book dates
2.Guest list.
3.From size of 2, decide where to have party. Book if necessary.
4.Think about degree of formality. Long white dresses, like chaps' formal togs are much cheaper to hire than buy.
5. Buy one of the bridal magazines - if nothing else it'll give you a good laugh - to get an idea of a proper countdown list.
Do not let anyone, not even me, interfere

thanks... normally I like to organise way a head, but if it has to be closer than a year, it has to be closer than a year.

Ways to save money:
1.Make your own dresses.
2.Do your own flowers
3.Provide your own music
4. Make your own cake - and the rest of the buffet
5. Apart from the first drink (champagne)run a cash bar
6. Put this information on the invites, which you are printing yourself
7.Print your own orders of service if you're going religious.

I'm not saying that the pair of you have to do all this, but you have friends and family who will be delighted to do a bit if given enough warning (one person only for each responsibility) and provided you're sufficiently laid back about it.

The one professional you cannot do without is the photographer. Employ the best you can afford. You'll doubtless get some good back-up stuff from your mates, but mates with good cameras have been known to cut everyone's heads off, to run out of film or batteries, to lose the camera and/or pics for months.

The only things you MUST have for a marriage are the words that make it legal spoken in front of trwo witnesses and the certificate signed by the celebrant, yourselves and two witnesses. Anything else is entirely up to you

At least a professional photographer will stay sober, hopefully.

Here in the SE UK, a photographer costs around £500, 3 tier wedding cake £250, flowers £250 (the venue will affect flowers as to the number of arrangements and buttonholes needed), disco £250. Just to give you a vague idea of how much things could be .

Wand'rin star is right, if parents or in-laws are stumping up, they should have some say in where their money is going. But it is still your day and not theirs.

http://confetti.com may be of some help.

Sorry;

http://www.confetti.com

Ignore the above entirely

http://www.confetti.co.uk/

wow , you're really helpful! Heh.. my gran already volunteered to do the cake

That's great - the longer the cake has to mature, the better - if you're going for the traditional iced fruit cake. The main thing is to enjoy the preparation as well as the day. I've just had a sad conversation with a colleague who reckons his wedding day was ruined by his feuding relatives. If you have any of those, get your parents to tell them to behave themselves, or don't ask them.

I agree, or chose a venue that has limited seating. Ours only allowed 20 which neatly covered our immediate families. It was a lovely, intimate ceremony.

We had an evening party after the reception for family, and could invite more to that.

My advice is that you go splurge and buy yourself a little bridal planner, and a few bridal magazines. the first should help you organize your thoughts on paper (if you're a paper person, otherwise a wedding planner website will do just as well), and the magazines are fun to look at, and you might even get some visual inspiration for designing your own. also, never underestimate the decorating power of tulle (the white gauzy stuff). you can make birdseed favors out of it, drape it most anywhere, etc..also, sweetheart roses are pretty and are MUCH cheaper than longstems. some things not to skimp on:
1. your dress..especially with a short amount of time, best to buy one you really like, even if it's second hand, rather than have a friend make it. your bridesmaids can all go with you (or if you're like me you can just get their sizes and go yourself) to a chain clothing store that sells prom-type dresses. i say chain because then the store can order sizes from other stores that they don't have in stock. also, can get them on sale quite cheaply if you're willing to shop at sears, maurices, etc. simple, satiny sheath type long dresses in a color you like are lovely and flatter many figure types.
2. your cake - buy it (pick a grocery store whose pastry you like), unless you have a pastry chef in the family.
3. your bouquet..make sure it's just what you want. the idea is that this is your one shot to be a princess. same goes for shoes, a nice perfume, etc. also..less makeup is definitely more for the bride in white.
4. very important - even if you can't afford a honeymoon, at the very least splurge on a hotel room. let your friends and family clean up and take your stuff home (if you're caught cleaning up, well, i'll come slap you myself) - there is no need (and i think there's a law against it somewhere ) for you to go back to your house on your wedding night. that said..a nice white negligee would be lovely as well...wait for a victorias secret sale (online or in the store), you can find pretty lacy get-ups for like 25 bucks.

hope that helps a little and congratulations!!!!

I have helped organise weddings on a 'shoe-string' including my own. The best one was a friend who had a truly "country" wedding. She married in a beautiful little church, in my village, in June (mid-summer in the UK) when all the roses growing outside the church were in full bloom.

The reception was held in a fantastically rural converted cotswold stone barn next door to the church and all the flowers inside the church and the barn were wild flowers gathered and arranged by a group of friends the day before.

There was champagne initially followed by wine and beer (far more popular with the chaps), all bought cheaply on a friend's trip to France. The food was simply but very good, prepared by a local caterer and it was served by the local farm/estate workers (dressed in white shirts and black trousers/skirts).

The whole wedding was so increadibly charming, no-one realised it had been done that way to save money, but thought it was just done on a country theme.

The thing is, if you want to have a wedding without costing a fortune, it is better not to stick to the strict formalities etc. as everyone will compare it with other formal weddings. Alter it so it is slightly unconventional, so everyone will think you have just added your own touches, whereas in fact you are also saving money.

For my own wedding, I had the reception in my cottage, which I decorated with flowers and ribbons. I did all the food for the lunch, my mother made the cake and a friend did the flowers in the church. My father decorated his car (beautifully) as the wedding car, and I found a very reasonably priced dressmaker to make my dress. Fortunately the best man was a professional photographer and so we saved a fortune there.

Hopefully with everyone's suggestions and a year to go, you will be able to plan the perfect wedding without costing too much.

I can't believe nobody has sent you here:

A378731 !

Since I'm pretty sure some of the contributors have added to this thread.

OH, congratulations btw. And sorry to hear about your grandad.

I can't really add anything, except to say that shoestring weddings can be the best. My whole (massive) family still talk about mine, and that was 17 years ago.

My dad organised booze and marquee on the lawn (he was still in the army then, got the guys coming back from Germany on exercise to use their allowance to get the wine) - the modern day equivalent is to ask if you know anyone coming back from France or somewhere who can help.

If not try a local off-licence or something, and get it on a "sale or return" basis - or do the bar thing, as suggested before. I hear it's very common nowadays and most people don't mind. (also, people don't tend to drink so much so you don't have family members having fistfights - yep, seen that before)

If you do get a friend to make your dress, make sure you both allow plenty of time. And once she's cut out the material, please don't lose any weight, or put any on. 2nd hand can be good, as is renting something, or going for a non-wedding dress that you can spruce up with accessories.

Best of all, please try to enjoy it, it can be a really stressful time, and I'm sure (since you're moving your wedding date because of him) you also want to spend time with your grandad, and you won't enjoy that if you spend the whole time thinking you should be out making up little net bags of sugared almonds.

Good luck!

My advice is save your money, go to Vegas, get hitched in a sleazy wedding chapel, have tons of fun, come home and tell everyone you're having a party and you expect them to bring wedding presents!

Perhaps not the best advice in the world but it's what I'd do (hopes b/f doesn't read this and think I'm making plans)...

For great wedding decorations including confetti and streamers check out: http://www.artistryinmotion.com