h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Thought I'd start a condolence thread for Gordon Brown and his wife.

For those who don't know he's the Chancellor of the Exchequer here in the UK and was pictured a few days ago with beaming smiles as his wife gave birth to a rather premature baby.

The baby died yesterday

No matter whether you like the government or not this is awful news. A tragedy.

Orcus

Well, it is something that happens to a lot of people. Bigger tragedies have happened. What about all the ones who didn't get TV coverage when their baby died?

"Bigger tragedies have happened"
Sorry Xanatic, but for a parent there is no bigger tragedy than the loss of a child.

As was previously stated, regardless of politics or publicity issues, as a parent myself, I can not help feeling for the Browns.

Losing a child is always tragic, but having it splattered all over the press must make it all the more difficult.

Although the spotlight may fall on one tragic, albeit 'famous' family it does help illuminate the tragedy of many others in similarly unhappy situations.

Compassion should not be discriminatory...my condolances go to the Browns, as well as to all others who have lost children.

here here

I find myself torn between agreeing with Xanatic and Whisky here.

It is a very sad loss for the Browns - and yet at the same time many other people have been - or are at the moment - going through this.

I don't agree that it should take up number one slot on news items - especially when other important world issues are taking place.

I would like to send my condolences to ANYBODY who has suffered the loss of a loved one - regardless of age or status

'I would like to send my condolences to ANYBODY who has suffered the loss of a loved one - regardless of age or status'

Just the sentiment that should be given Lady in a Tree

Perfectly put - lady in a tree

Yeah, my sympathy goes out to all that have lost a child, not just the ones with media publicity.

But considering that thousands of people can die in India without the media paying attention, I think we can direct our sympathy elsewhere.

As with anyone who loses someone close, especially when it is so unexpected, the Browns have my every sympathy. You invest children with so much future happiness that to have that removed, after a few hours, or a few years, is a terrible trauma.

To have this happen in the full glare of the press must be doubly stressfull, though the support the received fropm the public when the baby was ill must have been welcome, the intrusion into those private moments which were plastered accross the Mail and the Sun todayare just voyeurism as its worst.

Whiskey said "for a parent there is no bigger tragedy than the loss of a child" clearly this is true.

Xanatic said "Bigger tragedies have happened" this is also unfortunately true, for you child to die accidentally as the Browns did, is tragic and inexplicable, but to have your child deliberately killed is another matter, one which is without explination, understanding or forgiveness. And indeed such tragedies have happend and gone unreported because the press have been busy with this story, which is after all little more than voyeuristic celebrity gossip.

Rainbow said "Losing a child is always tragic, but having it splattered all over the press must make it all the more difficult" I can't help thinking of the parents whove had their children splattered across the streets of Palestine, Iraq and Afganistan these last few weeks.


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I think we can direct our sympathy elsewhere.

Does that mean that you feel that you have to ration your sympathy?

In the same vein, because there is a war on, should we stop caring about a friend who has just split up from a girlfriend, or offering comfort to someone who's just lost their job?
Compassion should know no limits.

Compassion should know no limits.

Media coverage however should be a little more selective.

There is a limit to how much sympathy you can feel I'd say. And if WW3 broke out, I'd probably also tell my friend to just get on with it.

I don't know what to think about what I just read. You see, I'm from the Greater New York Area. I also am on a "sabbatical" from my job, in the Coroner's Office.

If compassion is a zero-sum equation, and each of us has only so much to give, and right now we can't spare it for some couple we've never heard of (I've never heard of them) because they lost their baby, I don't think that reflects too good on humanity as a species. It says a lot about why we don't mind when the killing goes on and on, if we only have so much compassion to spare.

I have a friend who's a nurse in a neo-natal intensive and critical care unit. He's said more than once, it's when the nurses stop grieving about every single baby who dies, no matter how moribund at birth, that they know they need to be transferred out.

The same goes for people who work in morgues. I know some callous, hardened, totally disrespectful jerks in my line of work, who make crass jokes (and we all make jokes that would curl your hair, because that's part of the environment, but we don't say these things to people who aren't inside a morgue 40 hours a week, either) and even more disgusting physical humor at the expense of the decedents. I'm considered "too sensitive" because I tend to yell at them. S**t, that was a human being not so long ago, and maybe a better one than I, and definitely a better one than some of my colleagues, and mattered to someone -- usually. Street people deaths are sad because no one cared for them when they were alive.

I don't think I want to be part of a species which treats compassion as a zero sum. I'm Jewish, and I'm not taking sides for or against any Muslim on the basis of religion, because Islam and Judaism are not so different. Fanatics are ALL nuts, and don't see humanity in anyone they think is wrong, so it's "right" to slaughter them. I can't hold with that. It's shameful to us all.

While the point about one couple's baby being on tv and what about everyone else has some validity, there's some truth to what someone (sorry, I don't remember your name) said. When the First Lady, Betty Ford, admitted to prescription drug and alcohol addiction, it caused a huge rise in consciousness. Same when Roslyn Carter talked about her mastectomy. If this causes people to start discussing ways to prevent premature births (most, but not by any means all, could be prevented, and certainly in the communities where low-birth-weight and high-infant-mortality are problems MOST of them are preventable), then GOOD. Otherwise, it's just a big invasion of the couple's privacy.

Wow. I didn't realize I was going to go on and on like that. Sorry about that, folks. I came here to NOT talk about my job, and to have light and silly fun. But I couldn't let that go. If you've never autopsied a child... I'll leave that thought right there.

Quincy

quincy said a lot of what i was thinking.

i don't think this is an appropriate place for people to argue the principles of compassion, really, but i do want to respond to xanatic.

you said that you sympathize with everyone who's lost a child, but you also said there's a limit to how much compassion one can feel. if you really could sympathize with everyone who had lost a child, that would be practically every family in most of the developing world, and in places where there's a lot of violence, and... well, it would be a lot.

if you really think there's a limit on compassion, you're pretty cynical, or you just know your own emotional limits. i don't think there's a limit on how much compassion i can feel, but maybe on how much i can feel at once? there's just been too much, you know? quincy, i don't even want to try to think how you survive your job.

sad for the and all the people on it.

wfg

wfg,

I didn't survive that great. That's why I'm on "sabbatical". This is a vacation I was invited to take.

I can't talk about this stuff any more.

Outta here...

We never expect to outlive our children, I'm very sad for anyone who ever lost a child, or a baby, or a pregnancy, or anyone close to them....

IMO compassion knows no bounds.

I've had 9 pregnancies, I've got three children.

I agree. Very sad indeed, and having to go through it in the glare of the media must have been dreadful.