h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Here we are, understanding. I'm crushing, you see, let us crush together. Every Balinese wench would like to think otherwise.
Hold me now. It's a long time.

*slipping off slippers and exhuberantly leaping into a convenient tub of grapes, beginning to cha cha in the initial step on the road toward sacramental wine*

Not at all sure where this is going... I remember the good ol' days when all roads led to Rome. None the less, there's no time like the present to lose ones head.

Happy holidays, Dott.!

Here's what the doctor orders for you: Six or seven lustful young men in their prime.

And call me in the morning.

*rinnnnnnnng*
Bon jour!

Shall I sort 'em out and take 'em one per day, or shall I make a stew of 'em and dive in?

*searching for a jacuzzi, just in case *

You mean you haven't taken them yet? Hurry! What are you waiting for? Take them now in quick succession! You haven't a moment to lose! You've been very foolish to ignore a doctor's orders.

Well, it was a tough pill to swallow, but worth the effort.

I'm sure you feel much better. If ever you have problems with your physical or mental health, come to The Clinik. http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A674651

There are few things sadder on h2g2 than threads populated by the youth of America

I am not the youth of America. I am a lone Scot stuck in Pacific time and still two and a half hours from New Year.

Beth

South Pacific time (New Zealand) is 6.38pm, January 1.

North American Pacific time is about 9.45pm 31
december

Sadly there's no medicine that will cure a pompous dick. Your case is hopeless, Loonytunes.