h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

... i stood in the lift (or elevator) this morning for about 3 minutes before realising i hadnt pressed any buttons

Yes but have you ever put your glasses in the fridge and then spent ages looking for them?

Do you know that electrical thing, where you have an extension, and the bit where you plug about 4 plugs into. I plugged one into itself the other day and wondered why nothing worked

...i havent ever put my glasses in the fridge, but i did once spend most of a very hung-over day looking for some cigarettes that were in the fridge.....

I did that too.

it must be some sort of overcompensating-for-irresponsiblity thing, '..i'll be really clever and put this in the fridge so it doesnt go off' thing.....



i've done quite a lot of randomly stupid things.... like getting up and racing to college then getting there and having the janitor tell me its 10:30 AT NIGHT....
oh dear...

A couple of months ago I left work in the dark - kind of a bit creepy walking across the grass when you can't see anything, but anyway... Tripped over something which promptly screeched and started hitting me. I screamed, and a couple of security guards came running. To rescue me from the duck....

hey, thats strange, iwas told a story yesterday about 2 ducks raping another duck..... honestly, my friend saw it!!!

evil...

Invincible Driver, wtf, ducks gang raping each other?
Are you sure the duck that attacked you wasn't a swan? Swans are right nasty...

i know!! i didnt really believe it at first, but she swears its true

Yeah...I'm going off for tea.

The most stupid and embarrassing thing i have ever done,and believe me the list is endless,was to see what i thought was my husband walking just ahead of me.I crept up behind him,jumped on his back,and playfully bit his ear,yeah,you've guessed,it was a total stranger.The guy was quite ok about it once he realized i was not a mad assassin.That was over 40yrs. ago and i still cringe when i think of it

Thats either a really good or really bad one, depending on how you look at it! Mad assassins that bite ears, hmmm...

Nope, it was a small female duck, definitely not a swan....

I bet you made the strangers day, good thing his wife wasn't around.
Some of the really stupid things I do you would never believe. Like the other night trying to switch the reading lamp off at the wall and wondering why it didn't go off, I mean standing there for several minutes trying to figure what was wrong not even seeing that the "big light" was flashing on and off.

stoooopid!!

My favourite story about silly things to do is the young care worker told to go and help the elderly patients clean their false teeth. She took a big bowl of warm water around and collected everyones teeth in it. All teeth together she gave them a lovely warm wash and brush up then the penny dropped. Who belonged to which teef?

Ohh, that's unlucky. And sadly exactly the kind of thing I could end up doing.

Ducks don't 'gang rap' so to speak, in as much as there's no organisation or co-operation between the males, but it's very common for large numbers of male ducks, particularly with mallards, to be involved in sprawling fights over one female who doesn't exactly get a lot of say in the proceedings...

Azathoth! You're back on the threads I'm normally on, haven't seen you in ages.

Well that explains the duck thing.

gang-rapping ducks eh?