h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

How offen do we hear that phrase?
Recent statements like 'hug a hoody' and the 'ASBOs'.

What would work?
I have my own theory but it will take a lot more than addressing the issue single pronged. We all need to work at this issue together. Bring back respect, manners and education I believe is the key.
We also need to support parents who are trying their best.

I find that most young people are charming, witty, thoughtful and caring - not to mention being darn good company.

We should remember that it's only a minority of that particular age group who create problems for others.

Encourage parents to take more of an interest in their children.

One of the interesting comparisons was that those countries where the percentage of children dining with their parents was higher, had more decent youth.

For other views on this topic, you might want to look at the following conversation: F135418?thread=3642654.

Well, I can't vouch for that, but the anecdote is, my present (rented) house where we cook and eat together is far more sociable, and problems get dealt with far more quickly, than my last one.

I guess you can't really enforce it, but its a nice, quick and easy way to build bonds. Bonds lead to caring and responsibility. I would guess that a small grouping like that would be more likely to lead to a bigger grouping than to a conflict with another small grouping, although at some scales (large) with some people (leaders too big for their boots and supporters) that sort of reasoning obviously goes out of the window.

If anybody knew how to control the youth of today they'd be elected but, if we'd known the answer fifty years ago we'd still be listening to Glenn Miller.

I don't think an active effort to bring back manners is of any use. People are far too good at paying lip service to such a thing and it's frustrating, especially because when you really mean something it's unlikely to be believed. Sorry doesn't mean much anymore

I think it's about respect. Where there is earned mutual respect everything else follows.

Most youth are alright, but I think the percentage of those that are not is on the increase, although that could always be perception. I also thing that the gap between those we perceive as okay and those that are not is getting wider.

The trouble is that I do not know what moivates people to do the things that they do. How can we get inside their heads and figure out what they have - or what they lack - that allows them to break these inbuilt rules that most of us have. Why is setting alight to a rubbish bin a pleasurable activity? When gaining power over someone is simply by making them afraid, how is than an achievement?

Quote;

Where there is earned mutual respect everything else follows.





Yes, I fully agree.


Greetings from Amsterdam

Haven't there always been some youngsters who will test authority, or do things like setting fire to rubbish out of boredom/sheer devilment/whatever?

Is it that populations are larger, more mobile and it's become more evident?

The fear element is what's more worrying to me, that people daren't accost youngsters for fear of the reaction.

I'm not bad!

Vip: >The trouble is that I do not know what moivates people to do the things that they do. How can we get inside their heads and figure out what they have - or what they lack - that allows them to break these inbuilt rules that most of us have. Why is setting alight to a rubbish bin a pleasurable activity? When gaining power over someone is simply by making them afraid, how is than an achievement?<

It's my contention that young people (perhaps all people, but especially young people ... it seems to be something we outgrow with age) want/need/demand that attention be paid to them. They will make it happen, one way or another. When young people can receive attention for doing good things, or for "being" good, this will satisfy the need for recognition. These often are the high-achievers, the straight 'A' students. When young people are not able to find ways to be recognized for doing/being "good" they will manufacture ways to be recognized, often by acting out in antisocial ways. It's the notion of a veiled cry for help ... notice me! I'm here! I want to be seen! I need to be seen! Pay attention to me ... or else!

This suggests to me that adults should do more to make it possible for young people to find ways to be recognized for doing/being good. Get them involved in positive activities where they can shine in some way, sports, academics, arts, music, whatever.

I'm a nice youth...Let's see if I can shed some light on my ill-behaved cohorts.

>The trouble is that I do not know what motivates people to do the things that they do. How can we get inside their heads and figure out what they have - or what they lack - that allows them to break these inbuilt rules that most of us have.

>Why is setting alight to a rubbish bin a pleasurable activity?

Fire is both pretty and destructive. There is a certain thrill to creating something dangerous by your own actions.

>When gaining power over someone is simply by making them afraid, how is than an achievement?

It makes you feel stronger than them.

>It's my contention that young people (perhaps all people, but especially young people ... it seems to be something we outgrow with age) want/need/demand that attention be paid to them.

I've never believed that. In my experience, going bad stuff is generally an act of revenge against a cruel, harsh world. The rationale goes something like this:

"World hurts me. When I set a bin on fire, I damage the world. Damage=hurt. Ergo, if I set a bin on fire and throw it at that shop over there, I'll hurt the world and get even for the hurt it has caused me."

>This suggests to me that adults should do more to make it possible for young people to find ways to be recognized for doing/being good. Get them involved in positive activities where they can shine in some way, sports, academics, arts, music, whatever.

Thpugh I disagree with why they do it, I think this solution might work. After all, if you see that there is some good in the world, you're less likely to try and hurt it.

>I'm a nice youth...Let's see if I can shed some light on my ill-behaved cohorts.<

Thanks for your input. Any other ideas about what society can do to encourage/help young people survive the difficult teenage years?

I'm not young now, but I once was, and I remember very clearly that being an adolescent was not easy, even in my youth when drugs and other modern temptations were not so readily available. I also remember that it's part of every teenager's "job description" to push the limits, challenge authority, raise a bit of hell, etc. But when I was young we recognized that there were some limits to how far we could push things without getting into serious trouble. I'm not sure how it is with kids these days. And of course, it's no more fair to generalize about "how all youngsters are these days" than it is to generalize about anything else. But perhaps you have some further ideas about any this?

Well, I'm forty years young so I hope I can contribute

When I was a kid, we were *scared* of the police. A threat from a neighbour had you worried all day. Because the neighbour might tell your dad and your dad would give you a hiding.

It seems now, (correct me if I'm wrong), kids know exactly what powers the police have and more importantly what powers they don't have. A neighbour shouting will be laughed at and a father lifting his hands is in so much more trouble than the child.

Some of that is a good thing, but we can't take the positive side of *progress* without putting up with the consequences.

Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire is so cool.

I don't think that the youth can be totally blamed.
After all us humans learn by example.
I can't imagine what it would be like to be brought up in a 'house' not a 'home' where no one seems to care or want to know what you are doing.
I'm not saying that all youths that come from this type of background turns out this way but the chance is bound to be more likely than not.
I know quite a few youths and I believe that there is good in everyone and everyone has at least one good quality within.
I think it is sad however, that we seem to be living in an isolated world nowadays.
From the book I am reading 'the plane truth' one armish character said that with all the communication we have; phones computers, and media it seems that a lot of people are lonely.
I thought that was an interesting statement.

>>with all the communication we have; phones computers, and media it seems that a lot of people are lonely.
I thought that was an interesting statement<<

Not only interesting, but also true, I think

I think, generally speaking, we have less time now, than we ever did, in this current society to create lasting bonds and we are all becoming isolated in a world of equally isolated people.

Why? We commute miles to and from work, we either don't want to, or are geographically unable to create a "community" in the work place. Thats just one reasen!

There is constant bombardment of information; on the net, on the TV, on the radio in the media; seems to me, to paraphrase an old song, the more we find out, the less we know. The idealised version of life we are fed is not reality - but its *nice* its pretty, its sanitized. It's more glamourous than real life - therefore we escape into fantasy.

There is less time to work at relationships - if, indeed, we have time between work, commuting and sleeping we have the opportunities to find someone with whom to have a relationship. I'm not advocating the old "Man works and woman brings up the children" scenario, but it's getting to an economical point when, in order to be able to afford to have a familly, both parents need to go out and earn - in order to pay a Child Minder to look after their children!

To my mind, thats crazy!

And Child Minders arn't PAID to bring up children, and instil basic values, and tend to their emotional needs. They're paid to ensure that the child comes to no physical harm - ie, they are fed, watered and have their nappies changed. Its the parents job to teach the child basic social skills and encourage their potential

There is no familly structure now; not in the traditional way that we appear to be advocating.

If we, as adults are struggling, and are becoming neurotically lonely... whereby instead of going out (for one reasen or another) and socialising, and creating bonds with real live people, we communicate by the written word, on silent screens with others we think, or hope we might like.

But we don't KNOW we'd like each other, do we? Theres no eye contact, no intonation. No body language - just our imaginations as to these strangers some of us regard as close confidents *are.

Interesting as some of these conversations are with their myriad view points and information, I am slightly disturbed to be aware that in being anonymous, I could, if I chose be anyone I wanted to be - and if I were not grounded in reality, I could come to believe the screen persona I'd created was more real than reality.



So if we, as adults are like this (generally speaking) then why would we expect our Youth behave in any way different?

They can only work with the examples they experience, after all.

They know "something" is seriously wrong with the world they live in. They can't articulate it any more than we can. But one way to draw attention to it is to throw a paddy, to try and destroy what is hurting them.

It doesn't work of course.

"Neighbours, Everybody needs good neighbours
With a little understanding
You can find the perfect blend
Neighbours...should be there for one another
That's when good neighbours become good friends"

But the white picket fence
Is where community ends
We sit round the tv
To laugh at our Friends
Eat your biscuits & sip your tea
For the youth of today are on MTV

A spectator event
With voyeuristic intent
We laugh at the game shows
Forget about the government
Endemol & all they know
The youth of today are a reality show.

Eye thang you

I was just doing a bit of reading and came across a passage about how the youth of today are taking to novelties and new customs, the latest of which is to stitch these little crosses on their clothes and desert the army to gallavant off to Palestein with cousin Bohemond.

Do you know what your teenagers are up to?