h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Clitheroe Royal Grammar School - A1028431
Author: Clairybell - U225460

This is my first effort at writing for the Guide. I'd just like to know what people think of my general style, and where you think I could improve.

Many thanks,
Claire

Looks good to me Clairybell, and no problems with the information included.

You might like to think about adding some famous ex-pupils Are there any besides yourself ?

I'm afraid the teacher pupil relationship in grammer schools is long-standing and is unlikely to alter until some of those teachers who've been there 20 years retire.

This is just my opinion, but you may like to re-consider your remarks about the bell tower and the staff room. It immediately brought to mind the events immortalised by The Boomtown Rats, and may be considered distasteful by some, but wait and see what other researchers think.

Don't worry about your general style - the Guide is intended to be eclectic.

Muchly thank you. I'm not sure that there are very many famous ex-pupils as I type, but I do believe that there may be a few in years to come, so we shall see!

As regards the belltower, I shall see about revising it sometime in the future. As you say, better to wait and see what others think.

Claire

Good entry - but as far as I can see the whole thing about treating 6th formers like children applies to all grammar schools (or at least it did to mine) so maybe it doesn't need as much emphasising.

I agree with the previous comment about the bell tower too, I think that may need rewording.

Other than that, I enjoyed the article

Looks like a very nice entry Clairybell

I have a few suggestions for you:

"CRGS was founded in 1554 by William and Mary, for the free education of boys. Originally a single sex school, it admitted girls during the twentieth century"
As you already said it was founded for the free education of boys, you don't really need to add that it was originally a single sex school. You could reword that along the lines of 'CRGS was founded in 1554 by William and Mary, for the free education of boys. It remained a single sex school until girls were admitted in the twentieth century', and it would be even better if you could find out the exact year that girl pupils first attended the school.

I'm in agreement about the bell tower/staff room reference. I don't think that the Editors would allow that to remain.

Well done

Hi Claire,
A really promising start. I think that there are just a few minor points I would make.
Is there any way you can make the entry a little heavier on the historical background? I was interested in the history of the school and I'm sure you could add a little more to it.
I'm in agreement with the comment on the bell tower.
You obviously have a lot of affection for the school, and a nice line in wry humour, but for the edited guide(which this should end up in) you need to make it a little less personal.
Examples are the comment about the 'frankly ridiculous' blue blazer, the honorarium, the uniform issue, the parents and the tendency of staff to treat 6th formers like children .... which they technically are. The guide is all about personal views, but I think you need to be a little less perjorative.
Try to imagine that you are writing for an audience of interested prospective parents. Asides, and the odd in-joke, give flavour to the article, but too many leave the readers feeling like they have missed something.
It may look like a litany of nit-picks. Sorry if it does, but I'm learning to be a scout much like you are learning to write for the EG. If you can sort out the wheat from the chaff and change what you think is necessary I for one would be happy to propose it for the EG.
Good Luck sbe

Righty-ho, I have edited the bit about the belltower and the unnecessary point about it being a single-sex school. The rest I shall do as soon as I can, although it may have to wait for a while as I can't research the topic properly until I return home from university for the summer.

Many thanks for the suggestions, keep them coming. All criticism is appreciated! Cheers EG for the possibility of a recommendation.

Clairybell

I hope you don't find too many distractions during the summer to keep you away from finishing off this entry Clairybelle - I tried to recommend it last month but the Eds didn't feel that it was quite ready. Yeah, it's that close to appearing on the Front Page and having its own place in the EG

A very interesting entry, and I hope that Clairybelle comes back to finish it off.

There's one bit that I think can be teased out a bit:

>>The intake is very much middle class children, whose parents own two cars and a dog, with a sister or brother who will follow them to CRGS. This tends to put a few people off applying,<<

I had visions of a faithful dog and its siblings following the children to school

But seriously, is dog ownership a class indicator in Clitheroe? And what is the situation regarding siblings - are you saying there is an overabundance of children who are there just because of an older sibling being there, and not through their own merit?

I think you could clarify this a bit.

And by the way, instead of puzzling about the mysterious list of names, couldn't you contact the school and find out exactly what it is about?

Do come back to this soon!

Bels

Once again, thanks for the suggestions. I will certainly contact the school and see if they have any information on the Honoratorum Nomina. I doubt the people themselves will know but there may well be some literature on the subject, as well as on the history of the school.

As for appearing in the edited guide, I would be most honoured if this were to occur! In order not to keep you guys waiting too long I shall endeavour to contact CRGS as soon as possible to ask for information. Once I've been successful I will make the relevant changes.

Regarding the middle class in the Ribble Valley; dog-owning isn't a pre-requisite for being middle class I will grant you that. However, it is the case that the previous attendance of siblings does help a great deal in gaining entrance to the school. Such children still have to sit the 11+ but their chances are greatly improved by having an elder brother or sister already at the school. Personal merit is important, but for some reason family also plays a part. Not, you understand, in a "I'm from a certain family, so I will get in" kind of way. Just regarding siblings, not previous generations.

I'll keep you posted on developments....

Clairybell xx

Is it worth making it clear how to pronounce clitheroe? I have often been moved to snigger that the uninitiated might assume the "Clit" is hard, as in Clit-Hero.

Hello Trout, I see you've been browsing around my space as well as my entries. Well you're more than welcome.

Clitheroe is pronounced Cli-the-roe

Hope that clears things up for you.
Clairybell

Fine and dandy. Thanks for that.

Your Guide Entry has just been picked from Peer Review by one of our Scouts, and is now heading off into the Editorial Process, which ends with publication in the Edited Guide. We've therefore moved this Review Conversation out of Peer Review and to the entry itself.

If you'd like to know what happens now, check out the page on 'What Happens after your Entry has been Recommended?' at EditedGuide-Process. We hope this explains everything.

Thanks for contributing to the Edited Guide!

My God! I never expected that! Who recommended it? Come on, own up!

Thanks, I really appreciate it. I'm gobsmacked, but grateful.

Well done Clairybelle

Congrats!

Thankyou. I wonder what the finished product will look like..?