h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Home Made Pornography Do's and Don'ts - A979004
Author: Frumious Bandersnatch - U189494

sage advice

Certainly well written and seems like sensible advice. Can't say I'm tempted personally, but each to their own...

Should give the Community artists something to think about, if it gets picked as the Editor's choice on the front page.

Sprout

Very interesting.

Not that I'm keen to go out and make one you understand, but I do have some stuff at home that might be a good addition to this. However, I would prefer to see the first paragraph removed. There's no need to be old-fashioned you know.

Just remember that you need to be careful where you film to avoid breaking any laws.

Second para of disadvatages

Advantages

I think instead of 'What on earth must her father think that she gets paid for doing this?' does lead to 'What on earth would her father tink if he ever gets hold of this (accidently)?

Take of your shirt - should be Take off

To overcome does my bum look big find a different angle high overhead or go for the soft porn option where you only guess what goes on downstairs.

tape in another box see the classic film example in 'Trainspotting' where it appears in 100 greatest goals by mistake.

All in all though a good article I think.

Especially now Mina that they have laid down what is lawful

Outdoors no.

But a public toilet is fine providing the door is closed.

What are we meant to do.

Trainspotting - not by mistake - Renton swops the two videos over and then asks to borrow the greatest goals one...

Definitely need to mention the trainspotting bit.

Sprout

True sprout that is what happened indeed. How could I forget.

Also we could mention Chandler nicking Richard's video of Monica in 'Friends' only for monica to see it had been taped over.

Outstanding work!

I laughed out loud while reading this. Can't wait to see it up front!

It makes the assumption that the action will be instigated by the man. I suppose it could conceivably be the woman (or a partnership decision), so maybe something could be done to reflect this.

I know which is a very big assumtion I take it the author has never dared peer inside Cosmo then.

Very entertaining as well as responsible . And probably very useful tips for those who want to get into this sort of thing. This will be a very popular entry.

But is it pornography? After all, it's not for profit or commercial gain, it's entirely consensual, it doesn't exploit or abuse anyone, it's strictly private, and by your own admission it isn't like what you call "real" porn. Dictionary definitions aside, I think that pornography to most people would mean something involving one or more of these factors.

To me this seems to be more like a private family photo album, only video rather than stills. What do other people think?

I think it's still porn, and a part of the fun in making it is that it's tiptoeing on the edge of naughty. Just speculating, of course...

Also, there ARE women out there who instigate home porn. Ummmm.... I've heard of 'em. Maybe they just want to know what it looks like from the male perspective. Or something.

"entirely consensual, it doesn't exploit or abuse anyone"

I would take issue with the suggestion that porn does necesarily exploit or abuse anyone.

*cough*

Mr Dodgson would be proud of you. (Alice's views are not recorded.)

*sniff*

You've had lots of nice comments, would you like to comment (constructively) in return?

Um, thanks for all the nice comments. Spellings correct, Trainspotting is mentioned, and I still think I'm right that this is a mainly male-initiated activity. Anything else?

And yes, I do read Cosmo occasionally - it always pays to know what the enemy is thinking. But surely nobody over the age of fifteen actually reads that magazine for reasons not involving irony? Surely nobody who's ever had a job or driven a car thinks women are really like that, or that men are really like that, or that the world really works like that?

e.g. "if your boss is hassling you, schedule a meeting and confront her about it".

Point 1 - don't bother with a meeting. Hassle them right back, or look for another job. Better still, hassle them right back AND look for another job. Or more usually in my experience, at the first sign of hassle, go off work with "stress" and sit at home eating ice cream and watching Ricki Lake for three months on full pay, leaving your male colleagues to take up the slack.

Point 2 - "confront HER"??? If you're single and can afford the quantity of cosmetics, clothing, footwear, condoms, Bacardi Breezers and Marlboro Lights you'd need to sustain a Cosmo-reader lifestyle, there's no way you're in the kind of low-status minimum-wage dead-end job where you actually report to a woman.

I've worked a lot of jobs for a lot of companies. I have a lot of friends, many of them women, and they work for a LOT of companies. And of all of them, I can count the number who have now or have ever had a female boss on the fingers of one finger. This may have something to do with the fact that I and most of my friends have reasonably good jobs. Making the default assumption that your boss is female says 'this is stupid fantasy and nothing to do with the world YOU live in' clearer than anything else.

I expect lots of people will now come back and say 'but MY boss is female', to which I say 'and do YOU read Cosmo? and do you earn more or less than twice the minimum wage?': or even 'I'm female and twenty people report to me', to which I say, well done, there's the exception that proves the rule, and in any case, do ANY of those people read Cosmo? Can they even afford to buy it every month on what they're paid?

Interesting comments. The best boss I ever had was female and she is responsible for a whole department! And our Chief Executive is female and we're talking many thousands of employeers here.

Not quite sure what your point is?