h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They say that bad news comes in threes, well we got all three in one day. We were told yesterday at the hospital, that the result of the tests done on that lamp on her breast, is cancer?

They can't operate or so anything de her emphysema, so all they can do is giver her pills that they hope will stop it growing, or even shrink it.

Yet, we both know the truth, and after a good old cry, we decided to make the best of the time we have left together.

It put the excitement of getting our new car, on the sideline, in fact, the only time I've driven it, was to go and get a prescription that the doctor left, it was nice to drive, but my heart wasn't really into it?



Smudger

What to say that makes any differance ... So sorry

Have you got a small, portable oxygen cylinder for the car? Get out and about as often as you can


lil xx

Smudger, I am so sorry, but you are right to make the best of every minute and day together, organise things that need to be organised, and hope the medication does some good, without causing her any more distress.

Oh, and doctors are not always right, so hang in there.

best wishes,

Websailor

Thanks for your posts, much appreciated.

She can't have oxygen, as her lungs are so bad, we do have a portable nebuliser that we got a couple of years ago, and that has it's own battery, it can also be plugged into the mains, as well as the car 12v plug.

Once they sort out her meds, we can make plans to try and get out more, but she is very mobile at all now, and gets short of breath just standing up?

Thanks again.

Smudger.

Been through it Smudger and it is tough. The main thing is to try and keep a sense of humour but that might depend on how she treats you. I took some stick from my other half, as he took his frustration out on me

Keep in touch,

Websailor

Aye! WS, I've all that already, as she has gone through some rough times with the emphysema and then the brain haemorrhage?

So I have a good idea of what's ahead, the hard part is having to cope with it all, just after they have stopped the therapy I was having for the past six weeks, for the PTSD
Which has given me enough sleepiness nights as it is?

We are hoping the our G.P will put us in touch with the Macmillan Carers group, who help cancer victims.

Smudger.

Try fora s much help as you can get Smudger, particularly as you have your own problems. I was lucky to be but it was still a nightmare. I can't suggest anythign as I am sure things are very different where you are.

Websailor

We had a nurse in today to give Mk2 an assessment, and told us that we will be getting help from now on.

In fact she was surprised that we didn't get help earlier, I told her that it wasn't for the lack of trying?

Must admit, I will be really grateful for it, as I'm so tired these days. We have had a lot of visitors, but none of them have helped in any way?

Smudger.

Good news hope it helps you both

Shame about the visitors, but perhaps they are afraid to offer. Anyway, for your sake visitors are good, it is so easy to get locked away and focussed on your partner, and you need a breathing space and change of conversation. You are lucky to have them as so many just disappear when things get difficult.

Take care. You know where we are if you need a chat.



Websailor

Aye! Cheers for that WS, I don't mind them coming, but they all offer help, and to give me a break, but that never comes?

I would rather they didn't offer to help, if they have no intention of following up with it?

We have a breast cancer nurse coming on Tuesday, so we hope she can give us advice on where to find the help we need.

Smudger.

It is a bit like after I lost my other half, so many people said they would keep in touch or come round or invite me out. Have any of them? Not one! The ones who promised nothing were just 'there' and did without fuss.

Human nature I guess.



Websailor

Aye! That's true, like all the folk who told me not to worry about keeping my parents grave.

They were all parishioners of my Dads parish, when he was the Priest way up north in Golspie, they all promised to tend his grave.

When I got the chance to drive up there, some years later, it was completely grown over?

It's like Mk2 says,....a seven day wonder, then forgotten? ...........Which will never happen in her case.

Smudger.

She won't be forgotten Smudger, she is one gutsy lady

Websailor

I was sent up to the crematorium today by Mk2 to buy our burial plot, Geez! what a price they are £565, then the same amount again to be buried in it?

Before I left, I called the hospital to tell them that since we were told the news, we have seen or heard, from anyone at all?

By the time I got back, the doctor and the district nurse had both been to see her, and that starting tomorrow, they are going to come and give her a wash, and treat her bed sores, and give her the new pills, every day!

At last, I am going to get help with looking after her, it's been a long wait!

Smudger.

Oh, I am so pleased Smudger, it will make a lot of difference to both of you.

It is costly business being buried which is why all my family opt for cremation. We are running out of space down here anyway!i

Take care

Websailor

Cheers WS, another bad night last night, then we got told that my wife was going into the Hospice, to give everyone some respite, which we were all looking forward to.

Then we got a call saying it was all off, due to a double booking?

I did manage a two hour kip this afternoon, while her sister sat up with my wife, still a bit tired though?

Smudger.

Oh, that's a shame but hospices down here are struggling to help all the people who need it too.

Hope you get the chance to catch up on some shuteye soon,


Websailor

I was in visiting my wife today, and she has lost that twinkle in her eyes, and seems woozy a all the time, and only had around ten minutes of being lucid, for the three hours I was there?

The nurse told me that it was the effects of the strong pain killers that she is being given.

Her youngest lad took in our two year old Granddaughter this afternoon, and told me that really cheered his Mum up!



Smudger.