h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Just the 400, why not 4000.

That's just greed!

And your problem is?

Hi just came from the main h2g2 page.
Did I hear you talking about cake? I'm sure that 4000 would be eaten soon enough.

However in order to cut up 4000 cakes you would need a nice set of virtual knives, which, by curious co-incidemce I have here. What do you say?

Just reading about the choc .. *gasp, cough* .. late cake has given me a migrane! Any one got an extra Imitrex?

I'll take them off your hands, I have a shed load of weddings coming up. How much do you want for them?

Weeeell, this is top quality merchandise, donchaknow, proper stainless steel an' all. how many were you thinking of buying? I might be able to give you a deal on bulk purchase. From a look around at other people's knives I think £5 a knife seems reasonable. This might come down on bulk orders or if you make a comment on my home page (Aha, bribery to get people visiting, why didn't I think of that earlier?)

BTW do you need any forks?

Comment has been registered (I do love a good singalong). I am indeed interested in a bulk discount, what are your rates? Also, do you have one of those wood block things for holding the knives. I always like to get something sharp/heavy as a wedding present, I like to see it put to good use when the arguements start.

If you're in the market for knives and forks, I've got a nice collection of airline cutlery here, still in original plastic wrappings / complementary serviette / rubber band. The assortment of salt, pepper and sugar packets and refreshing wipes alone is worth 27.3 zillion pounds, but you can have the lot for threpunce ha'penny. Can't say fairer than that.

I'll swap you for last weeks copy of Scottish Recruitment, fat lot of good it did me.

Do you want to recruit in Scotland then ?

I don't want to recruit in Scotland, I wish to be recruited FROM Scotland. Entirely different thing. Why do you have a job lurking in the back of that Hillman Imp of yours?

A worthy question. Is there one for me too?

I prefer to eat my chocolate cake with pastry forks, due to the stickiness and scrummy-yumminess of the icing.

Do you have any left-handed pastry forks?

Hundreds, NOW GET BAKING.

Will you all stop talking about cake? I'm starving! Come on, less words, more action! By the way, anything for me in that copy of Scottish Recruitment?

If I make more than four chocolate cakes, my electric mixer overheats. For 2 more, I use my own elbow grease. A normal, healthy male can do the stirring, mixing and beating for 4 before he gives up. My female friends manage an average of 3.

For 400 cakes I therefore need around (400-6)/4 males and electric mixers or (400-6)/3 females.

I'll do you a reduction if you mix, but I'll still require you to pay for the ingredients.
.

Menza@@e,

I'll swap you the first 8"x8" cake which just came out of the oven for 2 left-handed pastry forks.

(THey're quite difficult to get hold of, you know)

Oh well, it was a nice dream while it lasted.

You COULD just mix 4. And you get those 4, guaranteed, if we can settle on a price. (plus the one for the pastry forks - that makes 5).