h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

HA ha you cheeky wee minx. I found yer wee hiding place.
I called my French Teacher a cheeky minx the other week.
She called me a bratt.
I couldnt think of a reply.

So i am smaller than your French Teacher hmmmm..... interesting. How could you see me hiding here behind my computer? Damn you! sorry

Well its not too difficult to be smaller than my french teacher (tee heee) and of course, it is well known that smaller ladies are ummmmm..... well.... small?

I'm not small, well not very small but i do like tall blokes, short blokes can be attractive but they tend to be very angry about something

Yes. I have known short people to have a general degree of angriness about them. And also ummmm, bees have the ability to make honey, but what is it actually??? Bee spit? Bee wee? Mouldy pollen? What is this strange substance that is so sugary and addictive?

who cares, it's sweet and good to eat.

I CARE!!!! It important i know what i am eating. I mean, when you are eating some sort of baked good, dont you like to know whether it is made from dog poo or not??? even if it does taste rather interestingly like peanut...

I know now, they make it to feed their queen through the winter after their all dead.

well?

hmmmm. very interesting. Oh and its my birthday tommorow. 16 oi willst be. oooh arrrr

Happy B-day. Hello by the way. I'm a goddess, no need to bow.

Thanks. But i wouldn't have bowed anyway .

And anyway, now its time for our favourite song:

I want to be the very best,
Like no one ever was,
To catch them is my real test,
To train them is my cause....

Name that song!

don't tell me it's something to do with pokemon?

Actually, its an irish folk song about catching leprachauns. You see, the irish thought that if they caught them, they could train them up and make them do magical things for them. And of course this is totaly true.


(ahem)
...

look i've told you before and i'll tell you again, i'm not a leprachaun i'm just short!

I am a leprechaun.... okay i'm not really a leprechaun, but i am short.

Short what? Short bread? Short cake? Shorts? Or maybe you miss typed and meant that you were shot whilst on duty. (*sound of gunfire*)

how about short og cash oh honey is tecnically worker bee's vomit

BEE VOMIT!!!!!!!!!!! Are you trying to make me vomit???? And we eat it???? UGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh. I MUST NOW KILL ALL BEES TO STOP THIS HAPPENING. (*runs off on his quest to kill the bees. He returns an hour later, covered in stings, only having managed to kill one bee. And that was because he trod on it. Accidentaly. And even though the others bees had died from trying to sting him, that didn't really count, as they commited suicide.*)