h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*The Greenhouses were smashed during the initial Rebellion, but plants still bloom here. Some of the sealed chambers, built below ground, are still undamaged and full of valuable plants, most of which produce toxins for use in bio-weaponry or poisons. Fester moves through a shatters greenhouse full of Oranges, Bananas and other exotic fruit, glass and debris chinking and rustling at his feet...*

" hey fester do you need any help clearing up here "

*Fester spins to face Ryu.*
[Fester] Ah, Ryu. I was here to collect some samples. Dangerous and otherwise. There was a secure bunker somewhere here, but reports suggest JACKAL forces in strength. Come along if you wish, but it may be dangerous...

*Screeching jet engines - ork fightas fly overhead and plough into the planet about 200m away from Fester and Ryu*

[Fester] Ah, Grishnak...
*Pulls out his Stubgun just in case.*

The companians draw closer to the clearing the fighta had just left, several very drunk looking orkoids stumble lazily out of the hull door. Fester notices they have Grishnaks mob markings on them, and breaths a sigh of relief and lowers his stubber

*The Orks wander closer. Fester waves a greeting to Grishnak, and notices a red ring moving up the chest of one of the Ork boys...
Shi-KAKKAKKAKKAKKAKK!!!
A 'Torji' JACKAL armed with a gatling rifle guts the Ork in his sights, and blows a hole in the head of the second. The group dive for cover. Fester cursed. Snipers he didn't mind, but Snipers with Gatling Rifles could kill entire squads in an eyeblink. A volley of shots shattered through the foliage of an apple batch, grazing the leg of a third Ork. He fell, but had the sense to stay quiet; if he cried out, the Sniper would have slaughtered him.*
[Fester] Grishnak! I'm pinned! Can you or Ryu see the Sniper?
*A Salvo blasts rockcrete chips out of the growth vat that Fester is hiding behind...*

Grishnak: "HUH???!?! Wah?? where the frag?"
*grabs frag stikkbomb and lobs it into the bushes about 20 ft away*
BOOOOM!
"Not there!"

*There is a rustling sound, the Sniper relocates. Fester spots movement, a fires a Rupture Round. It hits a rockcrete growth vat, but the shockwave from the round hits the JACKAL, and he goes down. One of the Orks finds his screaming form, and squashes his head. Splat.*
[Fester] Is everyone alright? *He turns to the wounded Ork* Here, let me treat that. The sooner that heals, the sooner you can go back to the fight.

" we should really get out of here incase of more stray JACKAL "

*Fester turns to Ryu. It often bothers people that Fester's gas-mask stops them from reading his expression, but Marshal or Pestilence could have told Ryu what his stance meant.*
[Fester] Ryu... You believe me so helpless?

" well fine "

*Fester laughs, an ugly noise through his mask.*
[Fester] Ryu, I was made leader of VIPER because of my skills, not because of my appearence! I must continue, but if you do not wish to, I understand. Courage does not make a hero.

" no i will stay and helpclean up , and i also might tip the blade of my sword with some venom "

[Fester] I'm glad to hear you're still with me. The silo should be right about... here!
*Fester pulls open a large, heavy door. Inside are rows of plants with strange coloured fruit. Biohazard signs are stuck everywhere.*
[Fester] Ah, my prize plants. How I've missed your potent fruit. A single drop from this fruit's juice will cause agony, paralysis and death...

" so which one is the best to use on my sword ? "

[Fester] The purple liquid in that cabinet. Any other toxin works on contact, and would burn through your sheath, clothes, flesh and bone if you put it on your blade.

" ok i will have a lot of that "

*Fester retrieves some samples of the plants, and places them in a secure pack.*
[Fester] There! Now, unless we need something else... Of course! Oranges!
*Fester moves enthusiastically to a grove of orange plants. He plucks a few, but pauses just before removing his gas mask to eat one.*
[Fester] Maybe not here... I'll save one for later. Ryu! Take whatever you want, but I'd recommend you get yourself some fruit, our rations are hardly appetising...

*Grishnak wandersaround the immediate area; boyz skulk around nearby acting as makeshift sentries. All of a sudden a howl is audible from the trees nearby. Not just any scream; not a scream of pain - it had an unhuman quality to it that sent a spine-tingling chill down all but the most stalwart or stupid of men. Or orks as the case may be....*