h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well if it's any consolation Zarquon, I have the same problems with books...and so does my partner... which unfortunately means that our house is a bit of a library! The most ironic one is "Clear your Clutter with Feng Shui".....

I also have far too many clothes, some of which date back over 10 years from my days as a goth...
I *know* that they are clutter, but I can't seem to part with a lot of them for some reason. I'm aware that they are clutter both physically and emoionally, but I get overwhelmed by the sheer task of getting lost in it all.
My partner and I moved in to a new house together in March, and I've been slowly working through all of my stuff, trying to get rid of the unnecessary stuff, but it's *so* tiring and depressing!

One at a time eh?

I wonder perhaps if I don't need someone else for moral support when I have a go at clearing some of my clothes. I have given some to my mum (she's even slimmer that I am) and some to the charity shop, but you're right - it's the sheer volume of the stuff.

Ditto with books. i also have at least two 'Clear your clutter' books including Karen Kingston's.

It has struck me before that as and when I have to move, if I don't do something now about it, I'm going to have to hire a couple of skips. I have a three bedroom house with a cellar and a loft!

Perhaps what Maggy said was right about releasing the 'deadness' that goes with clutter.

So yes, one at a time.

Clearing clutter is painful - whether it carries good or bad memories. Other people to help can be tremendously helpful because they don't feel the charge.

I remember, when I was getting married for the first time my Mum came round for tea and suddenly said: 'Do you have any old love letters from other men?' I said 'Yes' and she said 'Well they have to go!'. She practically forced me to put them all in a bag and took them away to be disposed of!

Ironically, when Henry died a year later and I had to clear out his London flat to sell it, I found a load of his old love letters which, of course, I read, and which actually hurt me quite a lot (being a sensitive Cancer-rising, Scorpio-moon type). I found that he had taken me to a hotel and to the same bedroom where he had proposed to a previous girlfriend. She'd turned him down but finding out about it later was not good...

I've just cleared some emotional clutter in a Marketing workshop!! It made me see how disliking and resenting someone else who promotes herself 100% had held me back from marketing my work because I didn't want to seem like her.

Getting rid of that emotional block sent me home and I started working on my new website immediately! Physical and emotional clutter do hold you back from happiness.

The prosperity workshop I used to do used to have a 'bring your clutter' morning where we did a swap-shop and that was great because one man's clutter is another man's prosperity!

I have quite a lot of letters from my brother who died some 15 years ago and also some bits and pieces that he bought me. I would like to throw them away, however part of me says it's disrespectful and maybe my son would want to see some of his letters. Aargh. What do I do?

I've also got things like the original stuff from my scholarship to Tanzania (when I was 19). I never look at it, however I'm hesitant to get rid of it.

What do you do about photos? Which ones do you keep? Do I throw out all the ones of my ex-husband - or send them to him? He was part of my life for 20 years.

Interesting what you say about the emotional clutter. Maybe, like me, you were brought up not to push yourself forward. "Children should be seen and not heard."

I remember you saying about the swap shop for clutter. Seems like a great idea.

Getting someone in to help me clear my clutter is also good. I had an American staying with me a couple of years ago and she cleared a room so it looked tidy and chucked some stuff out in just over half an hour. I couldn't do it and wondered why. Someone told me 'It's because there's no attachment for her'. I just thought I was weak.

I'm afraid I'm guilty of keeping letters from old lovers...
I suppose I'd better get rid of them before I get married!
Funnily enough I found some of them yesterday whilst clearing some (read: minimal ) clutter. Didn't chuck them though...

I find that it *is* easier to clear someone else's clutter than your own - my partner and I sort of take it in turns to help sort out each other's rubbish! I don't think that I'll be letting him near my old letters though...

Well done for clearing that emotional clutter Maggy!
I can see how that woman could make you feel that way (maybe that should read: I understand, because I feel that way about people like that too...), how did you clear that block?

I wondered about that too, Maggy. How *did* you do it?

I did it!

I had a ceremonial burning of some 10 year old letters this morning....

I didn't think that it would affect me quite so strongly, but I guess I've been holding on to (the worst parts of...) that relationship, and all the grief that came with it. One thing I reaised through re-reading them now, is that the way I felt so badly about myself was partly due to my ex's emotional blackmail at such a tender age (I was 17-21 when I was with him), so now I don't have to have guilt over my behaviour anymore....which is strangely liberating, but leaves me weirdly bereft of something.

There is *loads* more stuff like that to be disposed of, but I feel that it is best to do it in stages, rather than just burn the lot on a bonfire (I have had rather a lot of lovers and their associated clutter... ).

I once read somewhere that women carry the energy of men they have been lovers with for something like 7 years...
It feels good to be able to release that energy with love, something I hadn't been able to do before due to unresolved guilt and anger.

I'm free!!

Wow! Well done! I think the simplest answer to all of it is to clear things that feel bad and keep things which feel good...

How did I clear the block? Well, I had a miracle (but that poor girl didn't). Firstly just realising that I was beating myself up through it was very good in giving me the impetus to do something.

Then I went on the internet to look at her website. I thought that by reading that and assessing who she is now it might help.

Well, she doesn't have a website. All that was up there was some stuff about talks that she's doing for different organisations...and then about three pages of pornographic stories about a woman with exactly the same name as hers.

I looked at this (and it isn't nice stuff..all about having affairs because her husband's so boring - and he was named too) and my heart went out to her. Whatever my perception of her might have been, she doesn't deserve that. I don't know if someone did it deliberately or if it's karmic or what...but I suddenly realised that I didn't have a problem any more and I was free to go...

All a bit odd really...

On the energy thing - yes, it takes the chakras seven years to clear emotional ties out...like the physical body takes seven years to re-build itself entirely. There are things you can do in the meantime however, like loosening the bonds (clearing clutter etc).

Oh...on my ex...I just cleared out all the magazines that we edited together. I didn't throw them away, just passed them on to the editor who took over from us as an archive.

And I sent the Jewish prayer book that I used to love to my ex-Mother-in-Law, having copied out the prayers that I loved for myself.

AND I went through ALL the files on my computer and checked which ones had his name on as co-creator (we used to share a Microsoft programme), copied and deleted them so that the new files are all my own ownership.

This particular man is a psychic vampire which is why I needed to do that. Notwithstanding my own responsibilities in the relationship, he sucks energy from his partners and leaves them depleted so it's really important to get that energy out of my life. Even if what I'm writing is rubbish, I believe it so the action is still important for me!!

Congratulations to both of you. It will inspire me to carry on with my clutter clearing.

I didn't know the seven years per lover - I have only had two and it's now a good seven years since my last one. Maybe this is one of the reasons why I suddenly feel freer to go out into the world of relationships again.

I can relate to the psychic vampire bit. That's how my son's father is, and I was so relieved when he got married again, although I feel dreadfully sorry for his wife.

I can see the photographs have to go.

Well done Maggy!


hmmmm...psychic ...
I think that they are only attracted to powerful people (like us of course ) filled with energy and Life, so maybe we should thank them for alerting us to our Power..

or maybe we should just chuck em out with the rubbish!


Good luck with the clutter clearing Zarquon...
If you need any help, just come and ask - maybe we can help you decide what stays and what goes?

OK, thanks, I may well need this encouragement. I've just this moment taken out a drawer (aargh, drawers) and I'm looking through it.

Letters from my brother, who died, though. Should I keep a couple?

Photos - I know the stuff about only keeping flattering photos (that means I throw most of the ones of me away - I've only recently been happy to be photographed - I'm usually the photographer). How many photos should I keep?

I'd say in your brother's case, do it slowly and keep quite a lot. After all, photographs don't take up that much room.

About a year after Henry died I made up a photo album all about him/us with letters, photos, momentoes...and then got rid of the rest. I don't look at the album much but it's nice to have it there.

I sent all the photograph albums of my last marriage to my ex - the way he finished the relationship badly damaged the past as well and I couldn't bear to have them. However, I did take out all the lovely pictures that I knew I would love again one day - and all the ones which weren't of us.

Maybe we should do a swapshop between us! I'm relatively clutter free nowadays though...

I think the old phrase 'keep nothing which is neither useful nor beautiful' which means keep anything that IS useful or beautiful. Catherine Ponder, the doyenne of prosperity teaching says get rid of anything you haven't used, looked at or worn in a year. I always allowed two years as the British weather means you might not get to wear that winter coat or that summer dress for a while. In the US the weather is generally predictable!

That sounds like good advice. I think I'll leave them until later in any case. There are much bigger things to clear first.

My drawers will take longer than they should. I would like to start on my clothing soonish. That will be painful. I think I may need help with this. Perhaps my friend Rose will help.

I think one of the things that affects me it that I was brought up in a household where there was very little money and so still have a bit of a poverty mentality. I'm working towards having an abundance mentality and am much better than I was.

Mum used to save and buy new clothes and put them in the wardrobe and not bring them out until at least six months later so that when dad saw it she could say that she had had it a long time. Sad.

I'd say to clear the biggest things first Zarquon - that way you can really notice the difference in your house and the extra space that is then created.
Leave the little things like letters and photos until last as they don't take up much room - and your attitude to clearing clutter may have changed after dealing with the less personal things first.

*hiding head in shame, and wondering why it's so easy to help other people to do the things that you can't...*

On the subject of clothes.... why not get your friend Rose to help you decide which ones *really* suit and flatter you (is she brutally honest?!??)? There's no point holding onto clothes that no longer help you to look your best (again, wondering how long it will be before I take my own advice.....) so out with them!
We only wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time, or something.

You're totally right, Leopardskinfynn. I only used 20% of my clothes 80% of the time.

And yes, isn't it much easier giving advice than taking it yourself!

I had intended doing good things over this weekend, however I had a friend's child to stay over unexpectedly, and now a friend I haven't seen in 10+ years, who's been living in the US for 15+ years is coming to visit on Sunday afternoon, so it puts things on hold. Well maybe not quite, as I was in the middle of clearing some from the dining room, which I would like to look reasonably nice when he arrives this afternoon.

I was thinking yesterday, that often we teach others what we most need to learn.

Hi Zarquon (or should that be ??)

How did your weekend go?

Do you think that your friend from the US coming to visit for the first time in 15+ years is anything to do with the beginning of your clutter clearing??

And on the subject of teaching others what we need to learn, I agree with you.
Sometimes when I give Shiatsu, the things that come up for the client (health-wise and emotionally) are often things that I need reminding to work on myself.

Could be that they're related, Leopardskinfynn.

It was interesting how it came about. I was checking 1471 to see if someone else had called and I got an 00 number, so out of curiosity, I phoned back. I got through to a voice mail, with my friend's name and so I left a message, then I got a call from him. If I hadn't done that, he may not have tried again. I think it was that I was open to communication.

The last time he was here, he left it too late and I couldn't make the time to see him as I had other commitments.

I'm also beginning to see possibilities for myself that I wouldn't have dared to not that long ago. For instance, I wouldn't have thought of moving house or job. Now, if the time and the opportunity feels right, I would go for it and trust that it is the right thing to do. That would force me to deal with my clutter.

Another positive thing that came out of the weekend was that I was looking after a friend's child on Saturday and Sunday and she helped my son tidy his toys from the living room into his bedroom to make room for the Christmas tree that we put up.

So as you see, a weekend full of suprises.

And ... I don't mind either Zarquon or , or even ZSF!

it is then... (ZSF would be too confusing seeing as my abbreviation is LSF...)

But do feel free to call me Fynn, it's easier to type!


I'm glad that you had such a rewarding weekend...and you now seem to have so many opportunities opening up for you! Excellent!

Hi Fynn!

Yes, opportunities do seem to be opening up for me, which is lovely after what seems to have been a good seven years of blockage, probably longer (my divorce was 8 years ago). Despite the difficulties, I think I have come out of it as someone who is nicer and wiser.

Did you get the chance to speak to your partner about the Feng Shui? I'd be really interested in what he has to say.

I'm going to start on clothing soon as I want to clear the middle bedroom and it's full of books and clothes at the moment.

Hi Maggy,

What do you know about Pluto transits? I was told they were transformational and that they could be scary. I was also told that for somone 'in our world' that it shouldn't be quite as scary, as we are able to acknowledge what doesn't work and to move through the difficulties.