h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

In orbit you will find White Star 9 parked, the planet's surface is covered on forests, beaches and habitation domes, the motto is Anything Your Heart Desires Is Here.

On a deserted beach You will find the Captain of the White Star, chilling out with a Beer and a Trashy Novel

Join us if you want

*Defolds into normal space.*

Hiya everyone, HDS was boring decided to come here.

*The Tallgeese goes rocketing down onto the planets surface next to the beach where Captain Reefgirl is.*

*Tallgeese smashs into the ground leaving a big crater of sand around it. When you look at Tallgeese you notice that its knee is on the ground and the capsule hatch opens up.*

*Craxus walks out in his flight suit, and puts on some nice sunglasses. Craxus begins to walk over to Reefgirl.*

*pushes up sunglasses in a swift sexy move

Hiiii glad you could make it, pull up some sand and chill out

*hands Craxus a beer and some SF20*

*The UII forces suddenly appear inorbit of the planet and the crew rushes to the dropships to have some much deserved leave on the pleasure planet. The crew's drop ships descend and land and the brothels are filled with the sounds of drunken partying*

*HDS himself teleports down and participates in several parties which involve the use of finite improbability drives and all manner of things that decorum prohibits speaking of*

*Fortunatly they're nowhere near the beach*

*hands Craxus another beer*

Why thank you Reefgirl.

*Craxus takes the bear and sits down to Reefgirl.*

*He takes off his flight suit's shirt revealing his strong muscled body.*

I need someone to help me with the sun lotion, Reefgirl could you help me?

*a voice drifts over the air towards craxus*

You're perverted

*Mean while, HDS is just waking up from getting totaly smashed on Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters, he hwas quite a head ache, so he gulps down a handful of Ibuprofin and heads off to the public bathes*

*The EXCALIBUR de-folds, and settles down to land. It's hatch opens, and Mystrunner hops out, tucking his helmet under his arm and stretching.*

*several pretty women in hula dresses skip up to Myst. One of them points a finite improbability drive at him, turns it on, giggles as his clothes appear 2 meters to the left of him, clicks it off and hugs him when his clothes are back on him*

*Turns to the pretty girl, glares, and watches as she falls to the ground, dead.*

Right. Next person who tries that, won't be lucky enough to die first. I'm feeling evil today.

*One of the other women screams*

You're a friggin psycho!

*She scampers away and calls the corpse gatherers to get the body off the planet*

Corpse gatherers? On a pleasure planet...

This place has problems.

*looks around*
nice planit.....

well, some of the older visiters have heart attacks during their celebrating. Lots actually.

*Starts to rub SF20 onto Craxus*

Anyone else, this is the pleasure planet after all

*Points Craxus and Mystrunner to a sign that says DO NOT FEED THE TROLLS then points at HDS, winks knowingly, giggles and hands them both more beer*

I'm not a troll!

*Gets drunk, feels better, passess out, wakes up, feels worse *

Ahh thank you Reefgirl

*Craxus lies down from a rough time in his starship Asgard and his Tallgeese IV.*

You know life is tough when your almost always in combat.

*Hooks HDS up to an IV full of Absinthe so he's perminantly comatosed*

*tsk* you can spot the boys who can't hold their drink a mile off

Now do you mind returning the favour with the SF20, at least I can stop thinking in Minbari now, that makes your brain hurt

*HDS spontantiously combusts, with a flash the corpse is gone an a tall strongly built Scottsman stands in his place, this is HDS's new avatar, and it is sooooooo Scotish, that alcohol doesn't affect him*

Right, I'm off to the beach

Do me a favour sweetie go to the bar on the other side of the planet they're showing the Celtic/Rangers game, you'll soon see if you're scottish or not