h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oi moight 'ave a job for you. You'd 'ave to be discrete on account it's for a rather well-known researcher oo'd loik not to 'ave the publicity if you get moi drift

It's a bit of an unusual assignment on account moi master wud loik an entire thread eliminated. You see it's become a bit of an embarrasment for him - someting that started out small and innocent 'as got completely out of control.

It needs to be fixed and fixed quick. Somebody tells us you're the boys for the job.

Interested - go to F65857?thread=161877

You ain't seen me roight

Hmm... so let me get this straight.. you want the thread killed?

And what .. ah .. remuneration will be proffered?

Well I got a lart of surplus garden produce from the Chaps Club which oi could let you have at a discount

Maybe oi cud throw in a few bottles of Gin as well - they've got enough to keep the Royal Family afloat !

Sad as I am to say it (and partial to alcohol as I am), that isn't quite in the spirit of the remuneration to which the mercenaries are accustomed.. (and one should point out the monetary nature of remuneration).

what would you like me to be doing, exactly?

Ahhhhhh, Money - well woi didn't you say so furst up. Oi cud alus empty moi tip jar ..... oi think Mr Munchers put a tanner in thar in 1963 wunce and oi did foind thart 10 bob note on the 9th hole a few years back. Thats a tidy sum that. Wud thart suffoice ?

I've been trying to kill that blasted thread off for months - I've tried lethal injection, explosives, radiation, hordes of the undead, ignoring it, I've used conversation-killers and hypnosis. It's all a bit of fun and the more I try to kill it off the more determined they are to keep it alive. Actually my real aim is now to get the biggest journal entry of all time together . RD

*njan taps his foot unimpressedly*

.. how about a really really big fight? .. there hasn't been one in any rp threads for some time now. that'd either utterly kill the thread dead or expand it more than anyone anticipated before.

You might be interested in this: A899634

There's even a plot, if you're interested... A880896

*puts a $40,000,000 bounty on.. himself*.. would I be able to do that?