h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

'That bird is a lovely shag' - that has GOT to go in there!

"I've always thought that the expression 'shag pile carpet' conjured up some interesting mental pictures... "

...Not to mention interesting marks on knees and possibly elbows...

B

Hi, Ben!

The poet Robert Graves wrote a very odd little book called 'Lars Porsena, or The Future of Swearing and Improper Language'.

Writing in the 20s, he claimed that there was an definite class difference in the use of the swearwords b*****d and b****r. He claimed that in the working class, where people might well be sensitive about illegitimacy, but were often unfamiliar with homosexuality, b*****d was a mortal insult and b****r a much milder term.

The severity was reversed in the upper classes, who had nice traceable bloodlines and a boarding-school education. He claimed that b****r was a much more serious insult in upper-class circles, where people were more likely to believe it!

Azara

agcB
I think you should include definitions and parts of speech usage. It seems like this entry is seeking to be as scientific as possible. Why not make it comprehensively so?

Azara, that is great, and is going in there right away.

Theanthrope - um - no - it is NOT trying to be scientific, and I would hate it if people thought that it was. It is about usage, not about linguistics. A scientific entry, even one on scatolinguistics, is a project for a less flippant researcher than I am.

It is primarily intended to entertain and to give the information that you don't find in dictionaries, not the information that you do. And there is an excellent source online in www.yourdictionary.com.

If the Towers or the Powers Behind the Towers want full etymologies then I guess they will go in. But my time is limited, and I was doing this for my own entertainment.

Ben

I meant scientific as opposed to prurient, in the study of these words. Sorry.

No, I am sorry, Thanthrope. I didn't mean to snap. It is just that this entry has been around for a long time, since late April last year in fact, and it looks as if it might *finally* make it into the Guide. And if it doesn't, then it will be a definitive no. For now.

I do take your point about the etymology of the words, but I am feeling a little daunted by the prospect of all that additional digging in dictionaries: here's a proposal - if you can provide 'em, I'll put 'em in.

Everyone! Read this!

I have added the suggestions to date - but unfortunately the copy on my hard drive was the first version which went up about 10 days ago.

So some of the original errors and typos may be back, and some of the pearls of wisdom may have been dropped. Please cast your eye over the place where your suggestions should be and see if they are still there. I have checked it but am beginning to .

Spiff - you mentioned the 'quaynte' origin of the c-word, which is an allusion I missed - do you care to elaborate?

I will put the revised version up on Geocities, but not bother the mods with it. They put stars in the last version, and were confused as [insert short word of choice] about it, bless them.

a lexicographer called Ben

Ah yes

The use of 'shag'

I had to warn the Dutch continguency not to ask for 'heavy shag' when trying to buy tobacco in the UK as they may get more than they bargained for!

shazz

Ooops!

Didn't mean to bother the mods with this interim version; I was going to wait till the weekend.

Sorry, guys. *waves to mods*

Ben

If it doesn't get in, can we tack it onto my universit project?

Y

Well done, Ben - I am proud to have had my contributions included and credited! Just one thing - the 'shag' section seems to end in mid-sentence...

Also, further to the section on 'willy': I imagine that the celebrated actor/rapper Will Smith never realised how British audiences might interpret the title of his 1997 album 'Big Willie Style'...

thats great a mini slang dictionary.

heart of Darkness

ben, i finally got round to reading it last night





it's great. i really like it and i hope it gets into the guide. lots of lovely examples of usage to prevent people embrressing them selves.

well done
i wont make any suggestions cos i dont think thats really what you want right now!

FABT

Looking good Ben
Minor point: seems to be a typo or two in "definded with delicacy as 'a sebaceous seretion" in the brand spanking new smeg section.

vp

Yeah, this version is chock-full of typos... What can I say? It was late, I was updating V0.1 instead of V1.0, I was chatting, I was listening to Toploader, (what's a big Moka, btw?) and stuff like that.

But do tell me of any typos, I am crap at spotting them.

And just a reminder: Nominations close at midnight Saturday (in your timezone of choice). I will do the final version on Sunday morning, and hand it over the The Very Important Editorial Process on Monday.

Lets hope that the realise that almost all of the text has been published as individual posts on h2 already.

(Is it daft of me to be excited about this?)

Ben

no no, be excited, be very excited

Curiously enough, last time I checked (about 6 minutes ago),whichever version is on h2g2 was unhidden, visible to all comers....

... ah its latest version, I see.....

how nice to see it in goo

I hate to keep pointing out typos, but *They galked of his having a Cardinal's Hat,
They's send him as soon an Old Nun's T**t*

Should be They talked of his having a Cardinal's Hat,
They'd send him as soon an Old Nun's T**t

As it was quoting a line of poetry, it might be assumed to be part of the poem.

A small addition to include the phrase
"Busting my balls"

might be appropriate in the section on balls. This is an american phrase so it might be better defined by them but I think Busting SOmeone's Balls equates to winding them up.

Heavily used in american gangester films such as Goodfellas and Casino