h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

LOL..Yes, I suppose we'd better be somewhat choosy with our clientelle, lest we head for Bangkok brothel-dom..

And we don't want that now. But I think Bassman deserves our attentions, don't you?

*peers at Bassman* Maybe we should force him to make a case for himself. But then again, he seems to have lost interest in the prospect long before we did . Maybe we should put out an advert.

"Beautiful masseurs require males to be pampered in the Jacuzzi. Competition is high, so seel youreslf!"

perrrrfect..we should put it in our titles or something

That should have read sell... or steel, I suppose... Yeah, like it...

Good good..I wonder if we'll attract people or scare them away *ponder*...of course, what am I saying? A bunch of guys with the knowlege that two girls are half naked in a jacuzzi? Unless they're eunuchs..

I can't see many saying no...

hmm..well, angel, this girl needs some sleep. I think between the two of us, we'll have this place manned..er..girled..about 24/7

Okay. Sleep well, my pretty one!

[arrives, looking very abject]

Ah! At last! I'm getting confused between the two Jacuzzi threads now.

Shall I start on you back, my love?

[nods in such a way as to indicate utter, utter readiness, to the point of incoherency]

*jumps in fully clothed for a quick word*

Hi Guys,

I've had to change the title of this thread, because Jacuzzi is a trademarked brand name, and the company are not always happy to see it bandied about willy nilly. Can you try to refer to this lovely bubbly bath as a hot tub, or spa bath, or Rodney or something from now on?

It keeps us all out of trouble, and doesn't interrupt the conversation too much.

Now, I hope I didn't interrupt at a 'delicate' moment.

*leaves and for the other participants, and flies off on her broomstick *

I liked "Rodney". Is this a bit like the way Jethro Tull got sued for entitling their 1971 offering "Aqualung" by the Aqualung corporation of America?

I once saw an hilarious article about the Hormel Food Corporation vs. Jim Henson, about a character called Spa'am -- Spam being Hormel foods' main product (they thought merchandise for the Muppet Treasure Island featuring Spa'am the pig might compete with their own tasteful line of products).

[this little aside over, Andrew resubmerges himself and submits utterly to any tender ministrations aimed in his vague direction, hint, hint]

Alright, got the hint...

*kneads his back gently*

I didn't realise Jacuzzi was a brand name.

Nor did I. Very, very odd.

Hmm ...

[slowly relaxes and hums in a descending scale, eventualy reaching the subsonic]

HMMMMmmmmmm m m m m - m - m -- m --- m ----- m ....

(Shall I do you in a minute?)

Yeah, that'd be nice, though Nyssa did a good job earlier .

*joins in the humming sixths higher*

[starts with the thumbs between the fifth and seventh vertebrae, and the fingers spread over the clavicles and adjacent tendons; moves the thumbs outwards about an inch each and squeezes; repeats, moving gradually down the spine and widening the finger grip]

Now *that* is what I was doing to you, but I have never been able to describe it. The closest I got was saying it was like a fan. And it is, of sorts. Just with thumbs.

Mmm...

*closes her eyes and lets herself relax into the bubbles*