h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've had this one flatmate on several occassions and he really is a very good friend of mine.

Having said this, I've been living on my own now for the past two years and I still go flaming beserk if I think back of the last place we shared.

It was a crap place to start with. Really, my friend is still living there on his own and his ceiling came down last week in the shower. Fifty kilos of debris to deal with and a gaping hole. No, this is not something you can expect in an old house, mister Houseowner.

Somehow the sharing was horrible. We are both pretty neat people on our own but together we never ever cleaned anything. We made rotas again and again but they invariably broke down because one or the other just didn't keep the agreement and then the other would stop doing their part. Resentment festered. The fridge festered. There were bitter accusations (I really never stole any of his socks). We lost our innocence and our friendship has been pretty cold for quite some time.

I am still thankful every day that I can do the dishes without anger and frustration. Relatives who visit don't assume I'm alcoholic anymore since there is no longer five years worth of empty bottles and beercases in the kitchen.

I hope never to have to share my house again. Frankly I don't even think I would want to live together with my boyfriend (if I ever find one).