h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It means he got turned into a heap of little 1's and 0's, of course!

(Tries to figure his binary dna pattern, but gives up quickly)

thanx Red, we'll take care of him later-like probably when he tries to take over STUMPED again. Sound good?

Wonderful.

*walks in, seemlessly out of thin air*

Gooood morning people, I would like to purchace some unpleasently destructive looking weaponry, if you'd be so kind.

oh yeah and som simple stuff that usually works too, maybe an AK47 o something, they tend not to break at inconveniant moments

*Walks back in.*

Hello. On my quest to revive the h2g2 community. Anyone have any c4?

(looking for Sea)

the shopkeeper does not appear to be in...

*NYC walks past the unmanned counter and through the entryway to the storage room. A lone security camera whirrs to meet this new movement, if only so as to relieve the boredom of training the wallmounted guns on the every unfortunate cockaroach to crawl by. NYC looks at the camera*

Don't mind me, I'm just here for a few things...

*The sounds of wooden crates getting pryed open is soon heard*

*a click is heard from directly behind NYC Student's head. sea does not recognize him from the back*

whoever you are, you'd better have a pretty effing good reason for thinking you can steal from me. let's hear it.

raise your hands above your head and turn around. slowly.

*NYC slowly puts his hands up*

What, a blackmarket wholesaler has qualms about thievery? That's a little hypocritical, innit?

*SEA scowls. NYC hunches over quickly, throws his hands out and backpedals into SEA, grabbing her arm; SEA's gun discharges inches from his ear and both fall to the floor. NYC spins around on top of SEA with a pistol of his own, only to stare down the barrel of a second glock, as held by SEA's other hand*

*sweat beads form on NYC's brow*

Suddenly I feel the waves of unrequited goodness washing over me! I now see my wrongs for what they are! Stealing is wrong! I see the light! I'm saved, I say! Really! I--

*click*

--don't think you'd be willing to grant a little reprieve?

Ummmmmm....

(Fires borrrowed continuity gun at NYC, making note that

CONTINUITY STATES THAT YOU CANNOT PREFORM ACTIONS FOR OTHERS, ONLY REACT TO THEM.

the gun precedes to reverse time, and set the situation to where NYC has a gun to the BACK of his head...)

(Pulls a Dostovei out of cloak and aims at his face.)

Now we're back where we were.

nonononono, thanks for the concern, red fox, but NYC and i have had a long-standing agreement of mutual approval for continuity breaking. i have no problem with the action in NYC's post, and therefore will react to it.

*sea's finger tenses on the trigger of her gun as she faces both the thief and his weapon, then relaxes. she frowns and cocks her head*

i'm sorry... you look awfully familiar. do i...?

*sea's eyes narrow*

NYC? is that you?

*NYC peers past the gun barrel*

SEA? SEA!

*NYC drops his gun and hugs SEA, pausing only momentarily to raid the storage area*

How's things? Where's everybody? Who's this guy pointing a gun at me?

*hugs NYC back, and puts gun away. watches NYC raid the storage area with a complete lack of caring, as i think i remember giving him permission to do so millenia ago, and if not, oh well*

red fox, meet NYC student. NYC, red fox. NYC and i go back to the early days of STUMPED. he's got a few days' seniority on me.

Oh.

Quite sorry, old chap.

Oh, as you're both super villans, please take a little peeky at this:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/alabaster/A933491

*A figure in a deep hooded cape walks into the shop turning the shop sign round to "CLOSED" in the process. All that can be seen is a huge (and obviously fake) handlebar mustache. The figure is obviously trying to disguise their voice and is carrying a large heavy bag*

A-hem ..... shopkeeper - I have a complaint about the shoddy workmanship of this ere product wot you sold me a while ago.

*lifts the bag up and empties the various remains of the Kill-Da-Bug splat 2000 onto the counter top. Some bits spin round for a while and others roll off the counter to the dark recesses, nooks and crannies of the shop*

I wanted something with a bit of va va voom and some style, somat that would do some real damage. Wot I got didn't meet the specification - the Kill-da-bug was particularly ineffectual you know

SEA? You seem to gotta customer, but tell him the Bug-Zapper 5100 is mine!

Well well well, look who's back! Back from off conquering distant lands no doubt. Great to see you again!

*glances in the case and is transfixed*
I....Uhhh...need that.

with those-

That reminds me; what need I pay for this bunch of vicious goodies?