h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Right I see now

*Pulls miniture raven out of pocket and whispers something to it. It then flies away*

Right and thats my business taken care of.

*Corrupt squishes one of the ants*

I wonder how Aries could've smashed my head into Kudos's -- really, that'd be quite a feat since Kudos is **not in this forum**! Though I kind of wonder where he is... but...

Where is that danged NYC?!? I need some weaponry, and I need it NOW! I've got two people who need some... ehehe... "payment"...

*As she heads for the door, she pushes Aries into the plant, which tangles itself around him, grinning rather eagerly. She then stomps her way out of the forum.*

*pulls out knife and struggles against the plant*

*A mail chute hidden amongst the detritus on the far wall suddenly attracts attention when a note flows through it and stops with a /thunk./ It reads "Special discount: All firearms, whether kinetic, laser or energy-based, are half price to those who get villains out of tough scrapes. No questions asked, but the villain must stay alive at least until the purchase."*

YOU! Get your plant off of me or I'll kill it!

*waltzes back in, sees Aries's predicament and laughs*

Hah! Then you shouldn't pick on things unless you can fight back! However, Big Hungry won't eat you. Yet. He knows not to eat things that could be potential customers...

*she reaches over and strokes the plant gently. It instantly calms down, and as it relaxes, the vines become limp enough for Aries to simply push away*

There. Now stay away from the plant; I'm NOT helping you again! Oh, NYC...? Where's my DISCOUNT?!? I need some service here!

*puts the knife away*

Tell your plant to keeps its vines to itself or I'll cut em off.

Now back to my order, which I'll now need to increase to 19 genesis devices (ignores floors creaking) and a chefs knife set.

*Corrupt decides to disappear for a bit, and randomly teleports herself to a random forum in a random disguise.*

*a hole appears on the far wall, and NYC comes flying through it*

Much better! And now for another howitzer, two curved sabres, and a trusty laser rifle - and here I go!

*NYC jumps back through the hole*

*jumps through hole*
Eh? where did he go, then?
*Jumps back through hole*

*appears from behind the serving counter*

May I help you .......... gentlemen ?

*a note flutters to the ground*

"Put it on supervillian account #1337"

Whatever.

*looks up supervillian account #1337 and notes that it is larger than the national debt of Mexico and contains a special file note"

~icily~

We may have a small problem Sir.

*a call comes in*

And how does it compare to the bounty on Red Dog's head? I'll kidnap him twice if need be!

Good luck!

*brings up Red Dog's file on the computer .... it is like a vivid rash*

This Hero seems to be extremely well known to our organisation - leader of the Anti-Cat Federation and leader of a breakaway faction of the most active Super Heroes. Also member of some ancient neo-Imperialist organisation called the Chaps Club .... they seem to want to restore the British Empire. He has been a thorn in our sides for a long time and it is time he was neutralised.

This would be a prize catch indeed - I think we can do business.

However I note from the file that there does seem to be some issues about 10 Red Dog clones so please make sure you have the original.

You are dismissed - pursue your quest.

He sounds like a bad case.

*sirens and flashing lights suddenly start up, and a quick check of account #1337 shows that it holds more credit than the current worth of the Galaxy, due to recent purchaces...*

GIMME SOME!

I'm poor, no honestly I am I spent the rest of my money on a bunker buster.