h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

<---<< caught red-faced

A beeper goes off in one of the spare legs, announcing that Flint is within 1000k of the ship.

*finishes tidying after 3 days w*rk*

Whew! Well, Captain, given your taste in cupcakes I'll have to think of something special for your room.

Cupcakes? What would you know about my taste in... oh

Here, you pick the theme to paint - it's too much for me!

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=pirate+girls&hl=en&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GBGB395GB395&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=_4-5TrrcCsXVsga___2mBg&ved=0CEwQsAQ&biw=1152&bih=643&sei=%20BZC5Tu3wLYPHsgbBrb2rBg

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear - decisions, decisions

This may take a while. Don't wait up

*stirs the paint*

Tough decision. I think these are lovely - well, at least they seem to be clean:

http://images.cryhavok.org/v/Dirty+Pirate+Girls+by+jFury.jpg.html

On the other hand I think this broad looks more like our female crew members:

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_X2YpBDWHkYo/RoBrXC6JtgI/AAAAAAAAAQk/fAaUDBCRD54/s400/pirate+wench.jpg#I%20love%20my%20pirate%20wench

I like the pirate wench one! Jane Russell with a sabre!

Fierce broad!

*Finishes painting... *

Hope you're happy with Jane!

What's next?

Maybe you should ask Lanzababy.
In return for your favour she may show you pictures of senor Cesar Manrique's house on Lanzarote. He was a famous painter, sculptor etc. and his house is fabulous, partly built underground!

You could also ask Alec Trician, although I doubt he would like you to paint the generator room

Maybe he'd like a nice Hello Kitty decor?

http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=hello+kitty&hl=en&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GBGB395GB395&prmd=imvnsu&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=95zITr_AMMSZhQf4ms25Dw&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CE8Q_AUoAQ&biw=1152&bih=652

That'll be the day

You know after all the work being done here maybe we should have something special to eat.
how about

Sea serpent soup

Ingredients:
3 med. onions
1 tbsp. butter
1 tbsp. oil (preferably not crankcase oil)
1/2 sea serpent, cut into chunks (remove bones, but not skin)
2 tbsp. flour
4 or 5 c. water
2 tsp. salt
6 corn peppers
1 tbsp. lemon balm, chopped
1/2 tsp. allspice
2 tbsp. parsley, chopped
1/2 tsp. tarragon, chopped
1 tsp. grated lemon peel
1 tbsp. capers, chopped

Preparation:
Quarter the onions, then sautein oil until golden (that is, the onions
should be golden, not you, not that it's not okay for you to be golden. Dust the sea serpent pieces in the flour (we are assuming that it was a rather small sea serpent, as a really large serpent would not fit in any of your soup kettles). Brown lightly in the fat. Put in the water. Also put in the salt and herbs. Then cook gently for 30 minutes, leaving the lid off. Take out the sea serpent pieces and put aside, while you simmer the stock until it reduces and thickens (if it thickens to the point where you can dance a tango on it, you have simmered it too long, and should add a little water again). Put the sea serpent back into the pot, rewarm and serve. If you like, you make sprinkle parsley on top as a garnish.
(found in a 2001 posting while looking for my recipe for wassail)

Parsley? You use parsley for this? Really

Yes, great, but how do we get the sea serpent?

simple we use for bait.