A Tribute To Several A/K/A Random
Created | Updated Nov 10, 2005
Several a/k/a Random: A Look Back
I'm writing this with a heavy heart. Recently I found out that Post regular Several a/k/a Random had passed away. In addition to news from the world of sports, his weekly column was full of observations and pithy commentary about goings-on in northern Ohio and other corners of the world. Do you know how you will read someone's work and really wish that you could know that person in 'real life'? That is how I felt after reading Did I Leave the Iron On?, so it seems fitting to look back on 'the sporting news according to Several' to create a portrait of the man behind it.
Right from the first he showed us that we were in for an interesting ride.
Wow. A sports column of my very own...
I sincerely hope that Egon's loyal readership won't miss him too much, and I'm sure that both of you will enjoy my column every bit as much.
He had a curious mind
I do have a question, though:
When you watch tennis on teevee, does your head still go back-and-forth like it does when you're really there?
... and was interested in the quirky and off-beat,
And in a non-sports story of the week, we have the following report out of Cleveland, Ohio : More than 2,700 people braved temperatures in the 50's (around 14 degrees Celsius, I think) and a 4 AM start time to take part in a nude photo shoot at a park outside the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum along Lake Erie.
... but he was the epitome of moral rectitude (or perhaps only common sense).
(I was home in bed, I was not there, I'm 50-some miles away, and I don't go nekkid in public !) (Much... almost never... not lately.)
He could be serious
The big news across the pond is, of course, the passing of ex-sportscaster, ex-actor and former President Ronald Reagan, plus the remembrance of D-Day plus 60 years,...
...playful
And on an extremely local note (Shazz is gonna shoot me if I don't finish this fast, I'm WAY over deadline) it is deer-hunting season so I am hoping for a generous portion of venison stew or even a couple of Bambi-burgers.
...philosophical
Sounds to me like the 55-passenger, state-of-the-art motor coach that transports the kids is gonna be golfing, I-surfing and rock-and-rolling - makes me wish I were 32 years younger and could hit a green in regulation without getting lost in the woods and wrapping an eight-iron around a tree.
...or practical.
Let's put it this way - I wore my brown-and-orange down NEAR Pittsburgh once and was saved only by the fact I was reading a baseball book (plus she didn't want me driving back here bleeding in her sister's van.)
He was verbally adventurous
Aeronautically sound. Aeronautically sound. Sounds like someone's got their Sub-Etha Sens-o-Matic and massive amounts of Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters to me.
... not afraid to take a stand
One thing I do know about is deer and bears and this is the time of year when both become active around here, in my little corner of the world. DO NOT attempt to feed a bear.
...
Congrats to Wimbledon winners Roger Federer and Maria Sharapova, and somebody should tell Maria that her cha-chas are on the internet. It doesn't look like she needs to wear a bra, except for modesty's sake. (I'd love to see the outfit Wimbledon wouldn't let Serena Williams wear.)
... and had Douglas Adams' fond disregard for deadlines.
Oh hi! I've only blown past deadline again after watching various sports the past weekend on the Sub-Ethereal Communication devices... but, comma, however, I have failed to record any details of said AmSports I purportedly viewed, read about, or saw replays of.
He was also generous with praise.
And thus, this correspondent will serve this over to The Post Team so they can make me look and sound like I know what I'm doing once again.
He liked a good meal,
So, once again, this is several a/ka random, heading toward the leftover turkey, ham, potatos, veggies and white choco bunnies that the ears have already been gnawed off, over and out.
... liked a good drink
Timing is everything. Cheryl Crow just ended, and so shall I. AmSports, part zoo, part circus, powered by petroleum and television, ya pays your money and this way to the egress. So this is several, a/k/a random, contemplating sunrises and sunsets, belfrys, confusers and ther wiring, and looking forward to when I can have a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.
... liked another good drink
No way I'm gonna spend over a week watching dog's butts and sleeping buried in the snow where the polar bears and wolves roam!!!! (Pass me another Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster, please ? Oh, thank you !)
... oh heck, just one more...
...and hand me another Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster, please... ah, thank yew, thank yew ver' much.
And he was a master of the parting shot.
And that would be a wrap for the weekly AmSports report. Questions and comments will be cheerfully ridiculed at leisure. Ours, not yours. Over and out.
...
and this would be random or seldom, or a/k/a something with two bathrobes and two towels in two different places, wondering when the Vogons are gonna show up, and at which place, over and out.
...
Any questions as to what I just wrote can be addressed to me, in care of 'I have no clue, USA.' and include a self-addressed, stamped envelope. No cheques, money orders or charge cards required. Over and outta here.
He maintained a firm grip amidst the craziness
In his last (apparently) column on the 'net, Thompson suggested a new sport called 'shotgun golf' where two men earned points. One tees up a golf ball, the other attempts to shoot the ball in flight. Two points for the golfer to getting an intact ball on the green... then the man with the gun gets the golf clubs on hole number two.
yet wasn't afraid to get into the spirit of things.
In other unrelated news, there seem to be coyote in the woods across the street from me, chasing deer around for their summer sport, and it's somewhat curious to hear a coyote howl in Ohio. There is a 'blue moon' (the second full moon of any calendar month) at the end of July, so I suspect I won't be the only one howling around these parts.
Sports journalism in the Post will never be quite the same. I miss you, friend. Rest in peace. 
