h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Since the title is "Down's Syndrome", I think you should give a description of the syndrome close to the start. How about a paragraph in the introduction telling us what it is. At the moment all you say is that it is a genetic disorder.

I suggest you write such a description rather than just moving the medical section nearer the start, as the medical section is too technical for an introduction.

I'm amazed that you don't mention in the description of the syndrome any of the mental differences between a Downs person and a "normal" person. You mention it obliquely elsewhere, saying something about them not having as high an IQ, but that's the only mention, I think.

Children with Down's are more alike other children than different -- I think this should be "like" rather than "alike". Alike means they are like each other.

Thanks Gnomon I'll get to those points next week sometime.

I originally had the article with the medical info first, and it made the whole thing so dry and dull to read. Having swapped it to the way it is now I feel it's much more readable. Plus talking to parents, the info that I do have first is the stuff that is of greater importance.

I'll put in some IQ ranges, but they're quite broad.

Thanks again for the input.

Is this ready to go, Beatrice?

I think so - I've made all the amendments that I can: some of the other comments are still the subject of research, so I can't really put in further explanation.

B

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Congrats! Good one, Beatrice.

Thank you all. And a big thank you to friends, family and associates without whom I wouldn't have written this

very well done, Beatrice

Well done, Beatrice

all round

Congratulations, Beatrice. A very good article.

Congratulations!

Well done