h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[A smallish starship shaped like a television remote control flies toward the planet. The starship has Type Delta-7 engines. For some reason, Delta-7 engines, when they enter an atmosphere, only work for the time it takes to land. Two minutes after that, if not turned off, they explode. This starship has an imaginative solution to that problem, which is that shortly after entering the atmospher, the top opens up and a balloon-like air sack, as of a blimp, opens up. The Delta-7 engines shut off, and the starship now effectively doubles as an airship.]

[It lands within reasonable walking distance of the planet, and a twentysomething young man named Elbert Anoway steps out and approaches the palace.]

[Elbert] Hello?

*watches Elbert approach, waiting until he gets within earshot*

Greetings young Elbert, I welcome you to this fair Kingdom. It is seldom indeed that we are blessed with a visitor who arrives in such a noteworthy fashion. Might I ask what it is that has brought you to this magical realm?

I think it was a smallish starship shaped like a television remote control.

But notice the present tense as opposed to the past tense, hence the reference was to motivation, which presumably is continuing, and not to transport, which presumably is not

Oh I see ... sorry ... carry on ...

Not at all, thank you for pointing it out...

[Elbert] A friend of mine -- YK -- he's planning contingencies for if he needs to go into hiding for some reason. Let's see if I can list the other places he's looking ... CHOPPERS HQ, the Land of Nowhere, Hyrule, CLI, Japan (with Janine's family -- her father's better at martial arts than she is!) ... and here. His plans for this place are to become disguised as an unassuming local guy who lives in a semi-obscure part of the kingdom.

*nods* I can see no reason why such an arrangement cannot be made, so long as your friend is willing to abide by the special rules that exist here and my sovereignty over these lands...

[Elbert] And what special rules would those be?

Well, the ones on the front page, of course, but specifically these:
-No trees may be felled or harmed in the Kingdom
-No drugs of any kind can exist
-Anything else I feel like adding from time to time...
And of course recognition of my position and power as King and High Priest to the Great Old Ones, not to mention that this Kingdom is a place of magic and joy

*Royal Butler Thruthelthrolth watches the proceedings with much interest*

[Elbert] That we can deal with. I'll bring the message along to him. And anyway, we don't want to attract /any/ attention.

Very good then...a name will have to be added to the list of subjects, but as noone ever reads the front page anyway there shouldn't be a problem...

[Elbert] Not yet, not yet.

Let me know.

*yells* Yo! Everybody! New guy in the kingdom! Check it out!

[Elbert] Well, I suppose that's all I need to know for now. Goodbye.

[He boards his ship, which incidentally is called the Falcon, and takes off. The ship leaves the planet, then the atmosphere, then the system, then the galactic quadrant.]