h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OIC what you mean.
I know how to involve myself with Arthur, we're very close.

So you don't fancy a bit of torture while you're here?

*wanders in, looking around, trying to see why men might be reluctant to spend more than 2 minutes here*

Nice handcuffs

*smiles to self*

Lots of fun

I think I understand: It's not the place per se that men don't like, it's this place combined with Mina's presence. I mean, the whips alone...then there's the leather...and I can see that tool hanging up there would be intimidating..

*wishes could stay longer, but time is flying, and last drinks will be called soon at the bar*

*exits with longing backward glance at some of the soft leather hand ties*

~sorry she missed Tashalls visit and hopes she comes back soon~

My presence?
Why would that put them off?

That tool isn't intimidating, it's very useful.

* A balding, sweaty, dandruff-ridden, garishly dressed, middle-age man come bursting into the room... *

Hey Everybody !!!

I'm ready and waiting to test your devices to there erotic limits !!!

They don't call me the 'Love Machine' for nothing !!!

Infact, do want to look at my machinery !!!

* A belt hits the floor... followed by some trousers not far behind... *

Er.....I'll inform Mistress Mina right away, Your...er....Sir!
*clatter of high heels running fast in the opposite direction

I was warned that you would find me.

~inspects his machinery~
Hmm, in working order, although I've seen more efficient equipment.

Are you top or bottom?

* Gerald leers approvingly at his new paramour... *

Cor Blimey they didn't say you were such a firecracker !!!

* He looks down at her leather gear... *

On other women that would look tacky... but other women wouldn't understand the fine art of tackiness anyway !!!

* drool, drool... *

Now lets get down to business, thats if your not a little tied up.

* winks & whispers... *

Although you could be !!!

BTW Top, Bottom ?

I'm game for anything !!!

...so do you fancy a game of mixed doubles to start ???

A switch?
Excellent.

*peeks into the dungeon, just checking something for later...*
*looks at Mad Gerald, and tries to work out why he looks so familiar*
*shrugs, and turns to go back up the stairs*

Switches? Hmmm...I prefer a 'cat-o-nine-tails' but an old fashion switch could be fun.

*having trailed Zmrzlina from the bar, notices scene in dungeon and pulls out her own small whip*

*regards other devices hanging from walls, looks down at her own*

*discards small whip and reaches for a longer one*

I've just got the hang of this, let me give it a practice run

*CRAACK!*

*satisfied, smiles*

Your're really getting the hang of it now.


(by switch I meant someone who would switch (ie swop) roles)

*regards at Mad Gerald, now handcuffed to large wheel device. Trousers still at ankle-level*

Hmmm - do you think we could make use of these ring-like things. Not exactly sure what you call them, but I am sure they apply the pleasure/pain pricinple in equal measures...

*wonders why Mad Gerald has broken out into a sweat*

*Zmrzlina trails a pearl-handled 'cat-o-nine-tails' across Mad Gerald's belly.*

Ohhh...the sweat adds sting to the bite.

~enters dungeon, starts sharpening some sort of medieval torture device~

Hello Arthur.
Quiet again I see.

I think I might move us to an altogether busier dungeon. What do you think?

*Wanders in...*

A customer!

The day is suddenly looking up.

*Looks slightly nervous.*

Erm, Hi, I was looking for Zmrzlina...

Oh.
~sulks a bit~

She was here a few days ago, but I haven't see her since.
Would you like some torture while you're here?

Sorry , I'll have to check with my Mistress before I let anyone else torture me. But you do look good .

*Hurries off to find his Mistress.*