h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Watches Affy spinning a plate.*

This is turning into a circus.

Caer, I have it but only in two colours, dark and light.


I can't believe I just spelled color with a u like it was perfectly normal.

We shall assimilate you yet...

Now how does one spell through?

*Finds what looks to be a strawberry milk type drink. Purchases it, sits back down, and begins drinking it.*

*...and something funny starts to happen to his skin...it's almost as if ...*

Sorry, for some reason I thought of Veruca Salt (the character, not the band)

*Starts itching all over and starts scratching*

Could someone tell me what this drink actually is please?

*Ears and nose turn a bright shade of pink*

I'll have the light please, Witty, my pale winter skin is definitely light.

I think Zomnker could do with the dark to cover the glow on his ears and face!

I'm not sure what it is, though I'm pretty sure there are cures for it.

*Notices a splotch of pink on his wrist. Quickly puts his hand into his pocket*

Although similar problems may resurface months after a solution is found....

/* Examines the empty container that GDZ discarded */

"Non-Scouring Cleanser. Strawberry Flavour"

Hey Witty, even your products spell things with a "u" now. Z, is there another spelling of "through"? You don't mean "thru", do you? That's not a spelling, it's a "lite spelling" that is the unfortunately creation of some marketing and sales department.

Oh dear I've seen so many USAians use "thru" on line that I thought it was the geninue USAian spelling.

Still I still think center and meter just look ugly..

*hids from flames*

"Thru" has become too pervasive, but it's still not acceptable in formal writing, the same is true of "lite" and a few other words.

/* Continues reading label */

"Great for cleaning drains, polishing automobiles, lubricating hinges, and as a delicious dessert topping!"

I do like a multi-purpose product.

I only use 'lite' and 'thru' and similar shortcuts when I'm writing a note to myself or Mr. Moniker. Otherwise, I try to use proper (American ) English.

*Tries to hide the opening thread title.*

I was a bit disturbed to discover that spilt Mc's milkshake dissolves tarmac. That was strawberry flavour too

*Hands have become pink and hair has turned light purple* Just wonderful! Any idea how long this effect lasts?

Until the tarmac is repaved, I suppose. But shouldn't you be more concerned with having turned pink?

*Looks at GDZ.*

Looks like a minor allergic reaction to me. I wouldn't worry too much, that sometimes happens with products imported from Alpha Centauri.

You mean it's not from Panama? I thought A.C. stood for Americana Central.

*looks at GDZ and tries, rather ineffectively, not to laugh*

well, your daughter will like it!

*proffers a tub of Raspberry Ripple ice cream*

Have some ice cream, Zomnker, it will make you feel better.

Yes, much better....UNLESS IT MAKES IT WORSE! BWA-HAHAHA....ha....ha....

Sorry. Lost control for a bit there. I've not shouted a potential ironic twist for over a year, and it was time for one to surface, I think.

Affy, I was thinking the same thing.

Caer, it's not from A.C. is it?