h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OH, yes. It could also be a woman coming to hell

Dragonfly-First of all, please don't assume that I'm not being as open minded as possible. I do *respect* Buddha, and Mother Nature, for one thing. However, I *do not* worship either of them. Believe me, I wouldn't have survived the last five years of my life without at least being open to considering the stories, commands, and texts of other religions. All I know is that, in today's "You Must Be So Politically Correct That You Have No Opinion About Any Other People In Any Way, Shape, Or Form" society (well, okay, it's not that bad yet, but just give me a decade or so), it's hard to have any sort of belief system without being accused of not being open minded. For instance, I merely restated a commandment and got jumped on for not respecting certain past figures. BTW, don't think that because I posted something in that list means I consider it a god of any religion. I mean, Cthulhu and the Implementors? They're good authors, but why would I worship literary figures created by H. P. Lovecraft and the Infocom Videogame designers?

Also, there are many people out there who think that Satan was created by God. Not with the intention of creating a tempter to destroy humans with, but as a high ranking angel. We're talking about an angel roughly the same level as Michael the ArchAngel. Or, he may have been one of the angels who hovered around God's throne, praising him nonstop. He could have hovered above the throne, looked down, and said to himself, "Well, I'm technically above God right now, so...maybe if I worked it out like this,...I think I can take 'im." Shortly afterwards Satan and his followers are kicked out of Heaven, and banished to Earth for his prison term. I forget how long it is that he's supposed to be trapped on Earth, but it's quite some time.

Next, also on the Satan issue, he isn't a Christian invention. He was there for the Jewish church, predating Christianity by quite some time. For instance, examine the book of Job, often considered to be one of the earliest books in a chronological text. It's here that we first see Satan in a view similar to the one that he has today: he's given the term "the accuser," for instance, and seems to play the role of a cosmic district attourney. Satan was there long before Jesus was put on the cross. Oh, and as for your statement on Pan: worshipping him is outlawed, regardless of whether or not he's painted red. I know you're getting tired of hearing this, but I'll turn you back to the first and second commandments.

Englander-First of all, I want to comment on your phrase about the camel and the needle's eye. A "needle's eye" has two possible translations. First of all, it means the little hole at the end of one of those sharp pieces of metal that you thread cloth with. Now, I'll admit that this would be technically impossible. However, it's very likely that the verse refers to the second definition for "needle's eye." You see, many scholars out there believe that this needle's eye refers to a special kind of gate that was reserved for getting a camel into a city after night had already fallen. You would pretty much have to remove all of the camel's baggage, and then get the camel onto its knees, then somehow convince it to crawl through this ridiculously short gate to the other side of the walls that were built to defend against an army. Suddenly, a rich person getting into heaven isn't impossible, it's just more like getting an eagle into a sparrow's nest. And then there's the fact that it ties into getting a rich person to give up their material possessions to follow Jesus, etc. Scholars a pretty divided on whether or not the text actually means that, but I think it's pretty possible.

Second, what's this about God being an embodiment of all that is good and bad in humanity? I've not seen the bad. What are you refering to? I've seen a lot of times where God punished someone, but that's not bad. It's discipline. You don't let children steal from someone, and then let them off by politely saying that it's a bad thing to do, and that they should definitely consider not doing it again.

Third, I don't see what you're saying about this Sunday Morning Programming, if you will. I usedto think like that. I used to think of all the things I could do if only my Sundays were free. But then, I started worshipping God and serving Him everday of the week, and not just on Sundays. After that, Sunday morning almost became a celebration for me. Sure I didn't like waking up for it, but I've found that I'm grumpy in the morning anyway, and it can actually get worse in the times when I let myself sleep in.

Back to Dragonfly. I just want to make another comment about your comment about my moral obligations (sorry for picking on you like this, I just want to say something.) My moral obligations were caused by the culmination of many events, but especially after seeing two miracles take place. I don't know if you'll scoff me, laugh at me, or what, but I know why I do what I do. After seeing what I've seen, and after hearing what I've heard, I've made it my goal to serve the only God who I've actually seen directly do anything good for me. Besides, after experiencing these two miracles, realizing how I sent His Son to die a gruesome and painful death, and a lot of serious thinking and consideration, I've come to accept Him, and all of His commands. Including, but not limited to, spreading His word, and not letting there be any compromising of His Law. It's easy to use the "One God, many names" routine, because that seems to be the solution that pleases the majority of people. But what is easy to do is not always the right thing to do, as I'm finding more and more in my life. I was never told that this job would be easy. I was only told that it would be wll worth my time in the end.

Sorry if I forgot to cover one of your points, but I was trying to do it all from memory. I really wish that they showed more than one posting while you replied...BTW, I think that I forgot most of your arguments, Englander, so I'll apologize to you the most.

HErrrmmmm.... I have been through some miracles too. But for me, they didn't have a straight Christian slant. Perhaps that's because I may have been "raised" as a Christian(but not strictly such), and later on did my own studying and searching.

Glad to hear you have studied and searched-- I didn't know that before I jumped to conclusions and became upset.... funny place to discuss this, eh!??

I need a RL Chocolate Milk.

Just as you have a reason to follow your God, I have a reason to follow mine. What matters most is that our spirituality(I don't consider myself relgious-- but spiritual) guides us to treating others well, and living by morals which aren't, I hope, too liberal. How we find that path makes little difference to me-- it's hard enough keeping morals and being kindhearted!!!

I see your point about political correctness, but deep down inside, I have always been a Gnostic. As a child, I imagined that heaven was whatever each individual wanted it to be...

All this talk makes me hungry, too... cheesecake!??

*serves cheescake and carrot cake*

You all are so ~passionate~! Over the years my own belief systems have undergone several major overhauls. Keep growing.

Now, on to a subject somewhat related. Yesterday I purchased the new DVD of Jesus Christ Superstar starring Glenn Carter as Jesus. I saw him perform the role on Broadway this past summer. Fabulous!

YAY!!!!

Hah, I like this. Been thinking about this since yesterday: A good life is, when you go into a shop, meet someone you know, and realy get down to the real basics of life and then notice, you forgot your shopping.... And then someone comes up with CHEESECAKE!

Affy, did you bring the legos?

Ahh, yes, the Legos. Hang on,...

*Affy pushes a button on his watch, and several droids rush in with tubs of legos*

I hope this'll do.

I've always wanted to see "Jesus Christ Superstar." That's something else by Andrew Loyd Webber, right? He's always been my favorite Broadway Musical writer.

The first time I saw JC Superstar, I thought it was a blasphemy. The second time I thought it had cool music.

Yup, Andrew Lloyd Webber was the composer and Tim Rice wrote the lyrics.

Rent the video, Affy. It's never as good as seeing a live production, but at least you'll get a feel for it. There's a 1973 version with Ted Neely and the 2000 version that just came out.

When I go to see a musical, I don't look to see if it's actually managed to get anything right. Which is why I thoroughly enjoyed Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. It only losely (sorry about the spelling; it's late, and I'm tired) followed the actual story, but it was fun. I've heard from some friends of mine that Jesus Christ Superstar is the same kind of thing. And I've come to trust the judgement of these friends. Without them, I never would've hatched my first scheme for global domination...ah, those were the days,...back when the world would've been mine if I could've just found enough tungsten...

*Affy has a strange, sentimental look in his eyes, recalling some scene that only those who know him IRL would be able to guess at. Since no one on h2g2 even knows where he lives or what his real name is, that would apply to no one around*

::raises eyebrow::

What does he mean with "global domination"? That doesn´t sound christian - erm - well, it sounds christian enough...

:;giggles::

Ah now, Englander, I merely said that I plotted global domination. I never expressley stated that I ever wished to carry through with my plans. And really, when you get down to it, what's the point of ruling the world? It's pretty much the same as being a retired, wealthy multi-billionaire who never has to pay taxes.

Just out of curiosity, what did you mean by "sounds Christian enough"? Were you refering to those early hypocrites who promoted peace and love by threatening to kill you if you didn't? If so, I think you're placing me in the wrong denomination.

BTW, just out of curiosity, is anyone other than WM aware of my other character on h2g2? You really have to know him to understand my interest in supervillainy.

NO, it just sounded like some of the Charismatics and Pentecosts I got to know 10 years ago. They were waiting for 2000 to come along, then they hoped for the removel of all the christians to heaven, and when the 1000 years were over They would be the children of God rejoicing in him etc, while "we" bad guys go smegging off to hell (hah! guess which book I´m just reading...)

Heh... Ummm... I dunno...!???

Ooohhh, KL is ~really, really~ bad. Truly the opposite of our hero, Affy.

Do I hear something ticking?

Ah, yes, definitely not my denomination. I've nothing against the Pentecosts, but I disagree with some of their beliefs. I'm also not a clock watcher. When the second coming comes, let it come. Until then, I've got fun to have on Earth.

As for something ticking, I do believe you may be right. Where's that sound coming from?

*Listens intently*